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posted by LocalArtistist
Do you work at Subway? Because you just gave me a footlong.
Hi, do you want to have my children? [No] OK, can we just practice then?
There will only be 7 planets left after I destroy Uranus.
You're like my little toe, because I'm going to bang you on every piece of furniture in my home.
I'm no weather man, but you can expect mais than a few inches tonight.
Forget that! Playing doctor is for kids! Let's play gynecologist.
oi babe, how about a pizza and a f**k? [No] What's wrong, don't you like pizza?
Do you work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore - my face should be among them.
oi baby, I think you just made my two por four into a four por eight.
I'll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle.
You are so selfish! You're going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night.
What's the speed of sex? [what?] 68. Because at 69 YOU have to turn around!
I'm an astronaut and my seguinte mission is to explore Uranus.
If I had AIDS, would you have sex with me? [No] Well, I don't, so let's go.
Excuse me, but do you give head to strangers? [No] Well then, allow me to introduce myself.
Miss, If you've lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?
(Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with my whole hand.
Hold out two fingers and say: "Why should a woman masturbate with these two fingers?" (I don't know.) "'Cause they're mine sweetheart."
Let's go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.
Do you wanna come to the Marines, or would your rather have a Marine come into you?
There are 265 bones in the human body. How would you like one more?
Why don't you come over here, sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?
oi baby, as long as I have a face, you'll have a place to sit.
Do you take Visa?
How do you like your eggs? Poached, scrambled or fertilized?
You smell... We should go take a chuveiro together.
Would you like a hotdog to go with those buns?
Are you a virgin? [No] Prove it!
You bring a whole new meaning to the word, "edible."
I don't know what you think of me, but I hope it's X-rated.
I'm a writer, you're a writer, how about we get naked together and put some poesia in motion?
"I have this magic watch that can actually talk to me. Seriously, it's saying something right now. It says that you're not wearing any underwear, is that true?." [No.] "Oh wait, my watch is an hora fast!
I like your hair, your eyes, your smile... I like every bone in your body... Especially mine!
Lets play "Titanic." When I say "Iceburg!" you do down.
Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under.
This is a condom. If we put it on, we can have sex.
Do you believe in free love? [No] Then how much do you cost?
Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open?
Hi, I'm gay. Do you think you can convert me?
If I'm a pain in your ass... We can just add mais lubricants.
[Walk into her chest] "If they weren't sooo large, it wouldn't have happened!"
What are you doing tonight? Besides me, of course?
Will you be my girlfrien? I left out the 'd' cause you'll get that later!
My name is Skittles... wanna taste my rainbow?
Are those pants on sale? Cause they're 100% off at my place!
I'm with the TSA and I need to perform a full body cavity search, for security reasons.
I only have 12 hours to live... please don't let me die a virgin.
I'm bigger and better than the Titantic - only 200 women went down on that vessel!
What is a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper.
With my IQ and your body, we could make a race of superchildren and conquer the earth!
posted by GDragon612
1) Look at see through glass and when someone is on the other side shout "OH MY GOD, I'M HIDEOUS!"
2) Call someone to tell them you can't talk right now.
3) Point at someone and shout "You're one of them!" Run and pretend to trip. Crawl away slowly.
4) Buy a donut and complain that there's a hole in it.
5) Put Mayonnaise in a bowl, freeze it, and tell your friend it's ice cream.
6) Put up a "Lost Dog" poster with a picture of a cat on it.
7) Walk up to someone, hand them a potato, look them in the eyes and deadpan 'with great power, comes great responsibility.' Walk away.
8) In a public toilet, pass...
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#5: Miss Puff

Oh dear lord...after her Demolition Doofus performance, she's turned into a monster. She tried to freaking murder Spongebob!

#4: The Bikini Bottomites

These people are from the town of evil. They ruined Spongebob's dream (The Sponge Who Could Fly), Patrick's dream (Sing a Song of Patrick), they treated Squidward like a monster (Giant Squidward), did horrible things to Squidward after Patrick read Spongebob's diary (Little Yellow Book), and many mais crimes.

#3: Spongebob Squarepants

Spongebob is officially the little yellow devil. He crippled Miss Puff (Demolition Doofus), got a Nudibranch...
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This artigo kind of has a story to go along with it. You see, a few years atrás I was going to make an artigo about my topo, início 15 favorito animated characters but all I ever did was the title, the images, and character quotes. So I never got to making the artigo and it just stayed in my rough draft box all this time, just shows how lazy I am. Along with that, recently I made a video about my topo, início 20 favorito fictional characters but youtube blocked it globally so no one could watch it so I just deleted it. Please comment but keep in mind this is just my opinion. Enjoy!

20.Aang and Zuko (Avatar:...
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 título Page
Title Page
The kingdom of God is inside you, and all around you, not in a mansion of wood and stone. dividido, dividir a piece of wood and God is there. Lift a stone and you will find God.

‘Angel or beast along with powerful forces. The Wild Ones appear,’ a young girl named Eve Black wrote in her notebook. She continued for awhile, finishing with ‘an army large enough to destroy the mass of the matriarch.
Her journal was full of a story she had been composição literária about The Wild Ones and The Legion of the Black. She hurried to school. She waved to a few friends and went to her first class- history. She sat down and...
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Crazy Things Girl's Do:
Girl's Weirdest Worst Habits

Changing into dozens of outfits before a big date:
Adorable - Annoying
"I completely understand wanting to look great for a date---just make sure you don't keep the guy waiting."

Ordering a tiny salada for dinner, then stealing fries off her boyfriend's plate:
Adorable - Annoying
"We can always order another serving...and sharing is good!"

Spending hours over analyzing one little facebook comment from her crush:
Adorable - Annoying
"Don't make a big deal out of it. It's just a Facebook!"

Giggling like a five-year-old every five minutes:
Adorable - Annoying...
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