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posted by randomgirl3000
How you can tell if someone is lying:

1) Look the person straight in the eyes

•As in poker, your eyes foca, selo the deal. It shows vulnerability. If looking at the eyes for a while and the person looks away, you know he/ she is lying.
2) Eyes are situated to the right

•Demonstrates that the person is “creating” an event to cover up what he/she has done. The person is thinking on the spot so it is a good time to counter attack the lie with a kick!
3) Changing the topic right away

•If the person is trying to drag the conversation or keeps diverting the topic towards something totally different, try and knock’em down por repetitively bringing the topic back up. The person will have nowhere to run and hide.4) Temperature

•During the explanation part of the situation, if the person takes off their jaqueta or shirt, granted it’s not a very hot day, the individual is very nervous. The person is using all his/her brain power to think of something, which releases a lot of por products: heat. Another thing to notice is sweat. If the individual forehead is sweating, it’s a huge indication that he’s lying.
5)The longer the explanation, the bigger the lie.

•This is very true in many cases. This is what we call “bs”. Just pretend the person is cantar and ignore all the “bs” he/she says. Don’t take the explanation seriously and mover on.
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posted by iluvsmj
I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse!

Roses are red violets are blue, God made me pretty, what the hell happen to you?

Right now I'm sitting here looking at you trying to see things from your point of view but I can't get my head that far up my ass.

A pretty girl can kiss a guy* a bird can kiss a butterfly* the rising sun can kiss the grass* but you my friend!! yes you!! YOU CAN kiss MY ASS*******

If you didn't have feet you wouldn't wear shoes.....then why do you wear a bra??!

mirrors don't talk but lucky for you %n they don't laugh

Poof be gone, your breath is too strong, I...
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added by Quirnechia
1) Follow complete strangers around for 10 minutes, then speak into your colarinho, colar and say, "Harrold, we have a situation. Subject 367 is unresponsive. Code 163!"

2) When you get onto the elevator, laugh hysterically for 5 seconds, then glare at the other passengers as if they are crazy.

3)Run up the "down" escalators, shrieking hysterically, and when you reach the top, fall silent and glare at other shoppers as if they are crazy.

4) Approach a stranger in any Wal-Mart and hand them a espátula and say, with authority, "The future of the Earth depends on it." Abruptly turn around and walk away....
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