An idea popped into my head the other dia and its been playing like a little movie in my head ever since. I really need to know if its any good, or if the idea has already been used. Also I need conselhos for the characters and their names. I also appreciate constructive criticism and grammar and spelling. The names are temporary. I've never written a book that is completely in the present tense so please help me catch any tense mistakes! Um, oh yeah. It doesn't have a título yet so if you have any suggestions just let me know!
(: Thanks!
-Carly
The story is jumbled a bit. It is because the characters are experiencing tough times and can't think straight, so since they tell it, the story is a little jumpy.
Here is a a short visualização of the 1st chapter to an unnamed story in the making along with a summary of the book.
"Good morning," I hear the principal say as she does every day. Normally, I would politely respond to that with a "Thank you Mrs. Monrale, you too," but today I am pissed. How can she say that?! It was awful of her to say such a thing! It is most definitely not a good morning, I mutter to myself as she is all the way down the hallway now.
I pace around, taking a long route to my locker where, as always, the two cheerleaders on either side of my locker are cheerfully chatting. Normally I would say "Excuse me," but today I'm not normal. I can't bring myself to say WHY I'm so abnormal today. I'm not ready to get into that yet. Today is awful, life is just a dismay, people are always in your way, the principal is disgusting, the cheerleaders are horrid, and I am mad - mad at everyone and everything, everywhere.
That is a visualização of chapter one, in the the female protagonist, Josepheenah's point of view.
Here is a summary of the whole book:
Ever since Josepheenah said the words "I wish you'd just die, Eli," she has never stopped regretting them. Jo and Eli really got along until he decided to fall in amor with her. He loved the pool of brown in her eyes and the black mess of hair that she had always hated. Eli found her laugher to be música to his ears. Her voice was melodic and always on key. Jo always knew what to say to him, until she says the last words Eli ever heard her say. She took none of this seriously. But Eli would do anything Jo wanted. They were at her house at the time, so when Jo got up to get them a snack, he gave her what she asked for. Jo comes back to messages written on her mirror in blood, and balled up amor notes Eli never had the guts to give to her. Read the novel to get the story from both sides, and how everything turns out in the end.
Thanks for helping me out! x :)
(: Thanks!
-Carly
The story is jumbled a bit. It is because the characters are experiencing tough times and can't think straight, so since they tell it, the story is a little jumpy.
Here is a a short visualização of the 1st chapter to an unnamed story in the making along with a summary of the book.
"Good morning," I hear the principal say as she does every day. Normally, I would politely respond to that with a "Thank you Mrs. Monrale, you too," but today I am pissed. How can she say that?! It was awful of her to say such a thing! It is most definitely not a good morning, I mutter to myself as she is all the way down the hallway now.
I pace around, taking a long route to my locker where, as always, the two cheerleaders on either side of my locker are cheerfully chatting. Normally I would say "Excuse me," but today I'm not normal. I can't bring myself to say WHY I'm so abnormal today. I'm not ready to get into that yet. Today is awful, life is just a dismay, people are always in your way, the principal is disgusting, the cheerleaders are horrid, and I am mad - mad at everyone and everything, everywhere.
That is a visualização of chapter one, in the the female protagonist, Josepheenah's point of view.
Here is a summary of the whole book:
Ever since Josepheenah said the words "I wish you'd just die, Eli," she has never stopped regretting them. Jo and Eli really got along until he decided to fall in amor with her. He loved the pool of brown in her eyes and the black mess of hair that she had always hated. Eli found her laugher to be música to his ears. Her voice was melodic and always on key. Jo always knew what to say to him, until she says the last words Eli ever heard her say. She took none of this seriously. But Eli would do anything Jo wanted. They were at her house at the time, so when Jo got up to get them a snack, he gave her what she asked for. Jo comes back to messages written on her mirror in blood, and balled up amor notes Eli never had the guts to give to her. Read the novel to get the story from both sides, and how everything turns out in the end.
Thanks for helping me out! x :)
Life's like a rollercoaster,
Don't waste the ride.
Live it up all the way,
because today's your last day
What would you do?
Would you cry a little, scream a little, think it's all pretend.
Or go into silence until the very end...
Would you amor the ones you hate the most or be the person you hide?
Would you pretend that you're ok but really scream inside?
Would you try and keep the sun from setting as your last dia ends?
Knowing you'll never see it rise...
Tomorrow I'll be somewhere else you say as you close your eyes.
what can I do?
I'm self-centered, self-induldged, self-absorbed, hateful, short-tepered, implusive, in a complete state of denial, confused and lonely, yet I don't try to think.
a creature of the night
a princess of darkness
I long for light
colors
but all is midnight
and my only companions are the moon and the darkness
thought it comforts me when no one can
I wish to be out of darkness for once
to be clear, understood, unquestioned, and loved.
but who am I to ask for this?
who am I to want this?
is that what makes me human?
why?
all I want to know is why?
Step, creak, step, creak! the floor boards speak to me as I slowly tremble on its hard, splintery wood. Each step feels so daring. I feel danger crawling up my dangling spine. Thump, thump, my coração tries to refuse to my wishes of moving forward. Nothing has happened so far.
I carefully make my way towards the forbidden wooden chair. Creeeeeeek! goes the assento as I lower my self to its level and sit on it. SHHHHHHHH!
“What was that?” I whisper to my self with my eyes wide open. I slowly start to climb the fence to view the streets of emptiness and quietness. My coração starts to beat even louder. Thump, thump. I slowly turn my anxious head to look. But it was only a car passing por my house.
I carefully make my way towards the forbidden wooden chair. Creeeeeeek! goes the assento as I lower my self to its level and sit on it. SHHHHHHHH!
“What was that?” I whisper to my self with my eyes wide open. I slowly start to climb the fence to view the streets of emptiness and quietness. My coração starts to beat even louder. Thump, thump. I slowly turn my anxious head to look. But it was only a car passing por my house.
amor you forever is about a girl who lives in a town, and has a few friends, she is every teachers "Perfect Student". A new boy and his sister mover to town, and they fall in love. her father doesnt approve of the boy. the girl and boy plan to run away 2gether with his sister and her boyfriend. but her father makes her mover towns. she is forced 2 go 2 a all girls school, she is lost and alone, so she turns 2 suicide. the boy and his sister find her and they take her out of school and run away 2gether and promise to amor each other forever. but her father finds out and shoots the boy, the girl is in pain and so is his sister so they run away from their lives and live new ones, under false identities, until her father finds her and kills both of them. (btw the father is crazy)
ok so now i need ur opinions. is it 2 borin, or does it have a chance...
please tell me your true opinions.
ok so now i need ur opinions. is it 2 borin, or does it have a chance...
please tell me your true opinions.
i cant take any more
of these drugs.
the poison,
attacking at my veins,
fogo spreading through,
cant breathe.
but i need these,
and i must feel this
in order to get better.
no matter what it takes,
i have to get over you.
and even if this is
the most irrational way
to get over you,
i still intend on doing this.
i dont care how many needles
i must pierce through my arms,
how many seizures i must suffer through,
whatever it takes.
im going to do my best
to forget you even exist.
i dont care how much cocaine i snuff,
how many pills i take,
how many cuts
slice through my skin,
or even if i end up
killing myself in the process.
i would be so lucky.
so,whatever it takes
to get over you
is the extreme
im going to have to
accomplish.
i dont care if i live,
i dont care if i die,
i dont care if all of this
is even real or not.
im just going to do
whatever it takes
to get you out of my mind.
even if i die...
of these drugs.
the poison,
attacking at my veins,
fogo spreading through,
cant breathe.
but i need these,
and i must feel this
in order to get better.
no matter what it takes,
i have to get over you.
and even if this is
the most irrational way
to get over you,
i still intend on doing this.
i dont care how many needles
i must pierce through my arms,
how many seizures i must suffer through,
whatever it takes.
im going to do my best
to forget you even exist.
i dont care how much cocaine i snuff,
how many pills i take,
how many cuts
slice through my skin,
or even if i end up
killing myself in the process.
i would be so lucky.
so,whatever it takes
to get over you
is the extreme
im going to have to
accomplish.
i dont care if i live,
i dont care if i die,
i dont care if all of this
is even real or not.
im just going to do
whatever it takes
to get you out of my mind.
even if i die...
