10 Ways to Annoy Emmett Cullen
10. Tell him he looks like a creepy stalker rapist.
9. Inform him, as politely as possible, that he has grizzly in his teeth.
8. Ask who wears the pants in his relationship.
7. Try to stab him through the coração with a stake.
6. Tell him brawn is out, scrawn is in.
5. Inquires as to how he feels to be the least-liked Cullen male.
4. When he is around, wonder aloud what Rosalie calls him in bed.
3. Ask if he is overcompensating for something with that Jeep.
2. Ask if he is overcompensating for something with those muscles.
And the Number One way to annoy Emmett Cullen?
1. When he denies the above two claims, respond with “That’s not what Rosalie saaaaaid!”
10. Tell him he looks like a creepy stalker rapist.
9. Inform him, as politely as possible, that he has grizzly in his teeth.
8. Ask who wears the pants in his relationship.
7. Try to stab him through the coração with a stake.
6. Tell him brawn is out, scrawn is in.
5. Inquires as to how he feels to be the least-liked Cullen male.
4. When he is around, wonder aloud what Rosalie calls him in bed.
3. Ask if he is overcompensating for something with that Jeep.
2. Ask if he is overcompensating for something with those muscles.
And the Number One way to annoy Emmett Cullen?
1. When he denies the above two claims, respond with “That’s not what Rosalie saaaaaid!”
10 Ways to Annoy Bella Swan
10. Ask about Mike.
9. Ask about Eric.
8. Ask about Jacob.
7. Ask about Edward.
6. After asking about all these boys, inquire as to how much she is paying them, and where in the White Pages she looked for fake fan-boys.
5. When she complains about not being a vampire, throw glitter on her and claim she sparkles just like a vampire in the sun.
4. Ask if the thought of Edward biting her makes her… happy.
3. Say that since Edward is technically dead, she is into necrophilia. Tell her that is sick and wrong, and she should stop with her weird fetishes.
2. Tell her we all know about the real reason she married Edward – the honeymoon.
And the Number One way to annoy Bella Swan?
1. Tell her that you and Jacob imprinted on each other, and are getting married. Tell her you are pregnant, and will be with him forever. Videotape the reaction.
10. Ask about Mike.
9. Ask about Eric.
8. Ask about Jacob.
7. Ask about Edward.
6. After asking about all these boys, inquire as to how much she is paying them, and where in the White Pages she looked for fake fan-boys.
5. When she complains about not being a vampire, throw glitter on her and claim she sparkles just like a vampire in the sun.
4. Ask if the thought of Edward biting her makes her… happy.
3. Say that since Edward is technically dead, she is into necrophilia. Tell her that is sick and wrong, and she should stop with her weird fetishes.
2. Tell her we all know about the real reason she married Edward – the honeymoon.
And the Number One way to annoy Bella Swan?
1. Tell her that you and Jacob imprinted on each other, and are getting married. Tell her you are pregnant, and will be with him forever. Videotape the reaction.
