Twilight Funnies

So tihs is a story I haven't added to in 2 months! I've had this big writers block for this story :( But I'm back now! No need to worry!
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Bella POV

I threw my last bag into the tronco, porta-malas of Emmett's car and put myself in the passenger side. "Okay."

He put the car in gear and pulled out of my driveway. "You ready to go kick some ass?"

"More like blow up." I grined. "You did tell Dad we were comming through the outside gate right?"

"Of course." He goffed. "Like they would let us through with all your giant armas and bombs if we didn't."

"Good." I nodded....

Inspired from the mtv show Moving In.
Warning reted - M.

Hay, my name Is Bella cisne I'm - 19. I have a boyfriend, Edward Cullen(19). I amor him but ther Is one problem. I amor a boy named Jacob Black(18) too. so I asked my parents for help. My mother Renee and father Charlie. ***knock on the door*** *oww, he's here* open door and sees Edward. *hello, love* he kisses me softly. *come In* we walked to the living room. ***knock on the door*** *just a second* I opened the door and saw Jacob. *hay beautiful* he hug me and we walked to Edward. *what Is he doing here* Edward said angry. *no, what are...

!!!!!!!!!WARNING!!!!! ONLY FOR ADULTS!!!!!!
Hello, guys. It's been a while, since I posted for the last time. I'm sorry. I had one of the worst sessions in the university. Now I'm free, so I think, I'll end this story soon.


I was hesitant for a moment, and then I covered her lips with mine with a passionate kiss. I moved my hands down her back and felt some cloth, covering her skin. I turned Bella to her back, never breaking the kiss and my hands with one mover tore that lacy thing on Bella.
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“I will always be there for you,” murmured Edward. With this he sealed my fate. A fate of enveloping darkness, overwhelming sadness and heart-breaking loneliness. This dia was what I have been dreading for ever since we became friends. In a place of such sorrow and solitude you couldn’t help but find someone to lean on. Nobody was better in that respect than my best friend Edward. The only person I have opened up to and knew all my secrets. I was seven and he was eight just one ano older than me but seem to have an incredible knowledge for his age. He was an orphan just like me and …...

oi ;)I wrote a parody I think you laughed heartily, I'm sorry for mistakes...
Bella lying on the floor and the kidney, they were at Carlisle and Edward. well I heard what they are talking, but I was not interested, I thought, how to draw the attention of sino Edvos that they face suvalgyčiau D as Edward thought Bella and only he could read the thoughts of others but what to think. I suddenly had an idea "and has Dzaspis ketchup" as long as they were all concentrated James combustion. insert hand to match his pockets and was looking for ketchup. and what did I just deteriorate: gandonu pack,...