Reign finale recap: 'Spiders in a Jar' 

’s season 3. What with the amount of time it took for the dearly beloved CW network to roll out this season’s 18 episodes and the sheer amount of obstacles that plagued our fierce queens, it felt like we might never get here. Do you remember where we started? Mary was dealing with the Condé fallout, Francis was grappling with news of his impending death, and Catherine was hanging out with her new BFF Queen Elizabeth, plotting to take Mary down. My how things have changed — mostly for the better. This last batch of episodes have been the season’s best, with Mary using her grief over Francis to propel her forward in her mission to bring peace and prosperity to Scotland. She certainly is a very different woman than she was at the start of the season; tougher, politically savvier, more murder-y. If Mary was just a teenager when we first met her, she has most certainly earned her adult badge by now.

Okay, I’m trying to be very professional here, in honor of the season finale, but I can’t hold it in any longer: YOU GUYS, SOMEONE GETS BEHEADED AND I AM NOT OVER IT. I will never get over it. I felt obliged to start this recap with Mary, since she is the true queen of my heart, but all I want to do is talk about that death and how I never thought

would actually go there and that I gasped out loud when it happened. GASPED. So, because I have no self-control, we’re starting this whole shebang in England.

Over in England, Lady Lola is scouring over the letter she received with instructions from Mary to aide in the assassination of Queen Elizabeth. She’s searching for any way out, but, alas, the letter is written in their secret code, and Mary’s orders are clear.

Lola secretly meets with Narcisse to hand off John to him. She says she needs a few more days before she can leave for Scotland. He seems somewhat suspicious, but dude, if there’s one time to be an uber-controlling husband who murders people to keep your wife around, it is now. Instead, he seems willing to accept that Lola needs to stay for “an event” and that her good-byes to both him and her son sound awfully final.

Soon after, Lola has a rendezvous with her new assassin friend to go over their plan, and then they are off. There’s barely any time to process the fact that Lola is taking up the huge task with no backup or any proof, really, before she’s there in the hallway, making extremely noticeable nods to the assassin and demonstrating just how horrible she is with stalling tactics. She’s so obvious, in fact, that even Dudley, who has proven time and again that he’s not the smartest guy on the block, almost immediately outs Lola’s plan. I mean, this is the dude who, after getting rid of one wife and making it out alive from public scandal, decides he’s had enough of waiting for Elizabeth and gets remarried after just a few months. You could’ve been king, guy!

Thanks to Dudley, though, the plot to murder Elizabeth is thwarted and both the assassin and Lola end up in prison. Things are not looking good for Mary’s last remaining lady-in-waiting. When Liz visits her friend in prison, Lola explains that there can only be one queen, and Lola chose Mary. For good measure, she tells Elizabeth that because she is a power-hungry monarch, Liz will always be alone. Both of them are crying, and Elizabeth, most fearsome monarch in all the land, actually looks very hurt by all this. But at no point does anyone talk about calling this execution off. Well, except for one lowly recapper yelling it from her couch. But no one listens to her.

This is really happening, people! Lola is led out to the executioner’s block as the crowd that contains both Elizabeth and Narcisse looks on. Narcisse makes one attempt to stab a few of the guards and free his wife, but it is useless. Liz gives the nod AND LOLA IS BEHEADED. Up until the very moment the executioner swung his ax, I didn’t believe it would actually happen. Lola is dead, and now Narcisse is locked up in English prison and mad as hell. Hide your rats, Lizzy!

There’s some unfortunate news out of France, as well. After what is to be assumed was days of horrible torture, the Red Knight prisoner Catherine and Leith captured, finally tells Leith the names of two king’s guardsmen who are working with the Red Knights. It’s perfect timing, because those very same guards are asking Catherine and Claude to come with them for protection. Leith swoops in and takes them both down with a bow and arrow. It is very leading man of him, and Catherine thanks him by giving him and Claude her blessing to marry. These two are so stinkin’ cute that everything has to work out for them, right? Well, not if Martel de Guise has anything to do with it.

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Fresh off a very simple yet sweet proposal, Leith heads back out into the field to stop the Red Knights once and for all. Martel de Guise sends some of his men to assist, but by assist he means “to stab.” Leith takes a big one to the gut and is left to bleed out in the snow. He calls out for Claude, while she is back at the castle deciding on a wedding dress none the wiser. Why,

, why? Leith certainly looks pretty dead, but I refuse to believe he’s really gone until we get some type of confirmation. I’ll never let go, Leith!

NEXT: Catherine may regret her tireless search for Charles

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