*****ʀᴀɴᴛ.*****
Before this begins, most of you know me here as COLA. Hi. A bit about me: 20 years old and only getting older, música lover, horror story fanatic, friendly person in general and overall, I'm nice to people. TOO nice to people. So allow me to get this off of my chest.
Now moving, I'm going to tell you about this disgraceful dick eating mongrel minded lack luster piece of shit of a human being that was supposed to be a "friend". We'll just call this cunt inflatable Jeff with one f. Jef.
Now see, me and Jef go way back, and when I mean way back I'm talking almost 8 years. And all 8 years I have been nothing but understanding and a helping hand to this person. Even after he's slandered my name. Instigated bullshit. Got me INVOLVED in bullshit. I've helped Jef through alot, whether it was with financial problems, needing a place to crash for a while, needing someone to talk to, hell, I've even taken his side when I knew deep down inside my gut that he was in the wrong. I've stuck up for him when he was being a stuck up little twat of a garbage bag. A down right prick, mais than any cactus could manage to be.
So now that we're done with a little backstory, now to the inconsiderate two-faced dick, munching, pissy toilet water gurgling, apex uva stain on the existence of the carpet of life.
So I come início after work at like, 6:45 A.M. because I work the night shift, not to mention that my pseudo-bitch boss always has a thing for stamping mais shifts on my bunda like I'm some inhuman robot who doesn't need sleep to refuel on his own life. Granted, my work ethic is above average and I like to get shit done, simple as that.
Back on track, I walk into my own damn place of living to find that it's TRASHED. Fucking. Trashed. So I go around looking for the criceto, hamster minded autistic Luigi looking fucktard known as Jef to sort out just what the hell went on when I was gone. Low and behold, no where to be found. Great. Just. Fucking. Great. No big deal tho right? After working an damn 16 hora shift, plus an extra hour, now I have to spend mais time cleaning up other people's fucking clothes and belongings before I can even GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP. And this took over thirty minutes. OVER. THIRTY. For the I don't know how many'th time! But luckily, por the grace of the hairs on a pigs asshole, today was an Off day. Great. Eeh, not so much.
Around two o'clock p.m., this lubed horse faced chicken dick nugget, Jef, decides to finally show up.
And the conversation went something like this.
-
Me: Dude, what the hell happened in here?! There was shit everywhere man
Jef: Uhh, nothin'.
What!? Nothing!? NOTHING!!? Fuck that!
-
Me: Dude, what you mean the entire damn house was crappy as all hell when I got here!
Jef: Oh, well I didn't do it.
-
BULL...SHIT! BULLSHIT!! touro TO THE FUCKING SHIT!!
-
Me: What do you mean you didn't do it? Dude you were the only person here! I was at work!
Jef: *shrugs at this*
Me: And ALL of my snack foods are gone! My Cheezits, my Granola bars. my trail mixes, my snickers, my nutella--
Jef: But you said I could have some!
-
There's a big fucking difference between some and ALL. BIG DIFFERENCE. And obviously his aborted fucking brain couldn't process that.
-
Me: SOME. I said SOME! I already TOLD you before I went to work that I was going to need that FOR work.
Jef: Bro, chill, it's not that serious.
Me: What the fuck do you mean it's not that serious!? It's MY stuff! You had your fucking own!
-
Now at this point of the conversation, I started getting pissed. Why? Because if I've made it clear on MULTIPLE OCCASIONS that your stuff is your stuff and my stuff is mine, and the fact that you're trying to treat the place that I live like it's a fucking junkyard? Are you serious!? Are you fucking kidding me?! But no, that's not what set me the fuck off.
This deep fried cluster of clustered douchebags decides to try to get in my face, in which I rightfully shoved his Jim Carry's crackpipe brother looking bunda some steps back.
-
Jeff: Bruh, are you really gonna try to do me like that? Over some junkfood and shit dude?
Me: YES. "Junkfood and shit" that I PAID FOR.
Jeff: Bro, you're being an asshole dude! This is your house anyways so why the fuck should I have to clean it up!?
Me: BECAUSE YOU LIVE HERE!
Jeff: Doesn't seem like it, after everything I've been doing. You're being an inconsiderate shit bag! Yeah, some friend you're suppose to be.
-
..What? Fucking QUE?! FUCKING NANI!? You've got to be damn kidding me! After making sure he had somewhere to FUCKING LIVE, even sometimes putting his needs before my goddamn own, putting up with all the bullshit and drama that revolves around him, gettingmultiple bail bonds in the past just to keep his mooching rodent mouthed shit faced bunda out of jail, THIS, is what I get!?
"Some friend you're supposed to be". Shenme? Kakiye? Really!?
There were a few mais exchanges of words that damn near led to a fist fight, but it all boiled down to me telling him to call whoever the fuck he needs to and getting the ever living FUCK out my place. I even gave him a fucking option for me to call a taxi for him if that meant him getting out faster. And now the ignorant parasite is gone over to some relative's place. Good fucking riddance.
This is why I don't like people half of the time, because I'm the one disappointed when they turn out to be dipshitted cunt stains on the fabric of my life. I've already got too many problems to deal with as it is, and now it's a few less. Moral of the story: Start being a complete asshole to people. Because the nicer you are, the mais you're going to get walked on. The better of a kind-hearted individual you try to be, the mais it'll be taken for weakness and granted.
And I don't usually wish bad on anybody, but I hope he gets fisted with a paper weight with needles at the ends of them. Fuck'em.
And that concludes my rant. And now I'm going to go grab a drink or two that might mover into three or a few, and maybe get pissy drunk until I crash.
Before this begins, most of you know me here as COLA. Hi. A bit about me: 20 years old and only getting older, música lover, horror story fanatic, friendly person in general and overall, I'm nice to people. TOO nice to people. So allow me to get this off of my chest.
Now moving, I'm going to tell you about this disgraceful dick eating mongrel minded lack luster piece of shit of a human being that was supposed to be a "friend". We'll just call this cunt inflatable Jeff with one f. Jef.
Now see, me and Jef go way back, and when I mean way back I'm talking almost 8 years. And all 8 years I have been nothing but understanding and a helping hand to this person. Even after he's slandered my name. Instigated bullshit. Got me INVOLVED in bullshit. I've helped Jef through alot, whether it was with financial problems, needing a place to crash for a while, needing someone to talk to, hell, I've even taken his side when I knew deep down inside my gut that he was in the wrong. I've stuck up for him when he was being a stuck up little twat of a garbage bag. A down right prick, mais than any cactus could manage to be.
So now that we're done with a little backstory, now to the inconsiderate two-faced dick, munching, pissy toilet water gurgling, apex uva stain on the existence of the carpet of life.
So I come início after work at like, 6:45 A.M. because I work the night shift, not to mention that my pseudo-bitch boss always has a thing for stamping mais shifts on my bunda like I'm some inhuman robot who doesn't need sleep to refuel on his own life. Granted, my work ethic is above average and I like to get shit done, simple as that.
Back on track, I walk into my own damn place of living to find that it's TRASHED. Fucking. Trashed. So I go around looking for the criceto, hamster minded autistic Luigi looking fucktard known as Jef to sort out just what the hell went on when I was gone. Low and behold, no where to be found. Great. Just. Fucking. Great. No big deal tho right? After working an damn 16 hora shift, plus an extra hour, now I have to spend mais time cleaning up other people's fucking clothes and belongings before I can even GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP. And this took over thirty minutes. OVER. THIRTY. For the I don't know how many'th time! But luckily, por the grace of the hairs on a pigs asshole, today was an Off day. Great. Eeh, not so much.
Around two o'clock p.m., this lubed horse faced chicken dick nugget, Jef, decides to finally show up.
And the conversation went something like this.
-
Me: Dude, what the hell happened in here?! There was shit everywhere man
Jef: Uhh, nothin'.
What!? Nothing!? NOTHING!!? Fuck that!
-
Me: Dude, what you mean the entire damn house was crappy as all hell when I got here!
Jef: Oh, well I didn't do it.
-
BULL...SHIT! BULLSHIT!! touro TO THE FUCKING SHIT!!
-
Me: What do you mean you didn't do it? Dude you were the only person here! I was at work!
Jef: *shrugs at this*
Me: And ALL of my snack foods are gone! My Cheezits, my Granola bars. my trail mixes, my snickers, my nutella--
Jef: But you said I could have some!
-
There's a big fucking difference between some and ALL. BIG DIFFERENCE. And obviously his aborted fucking brain couldn't process that.
-
Me: SOME. I said SOME! I already TOLD you before I went to work that I was going to need that FOR work.
Jef: Bro, chill, it's not that serious.
Me: What the fuck do you mean it's not that serious!? It's MY stuff! You had your fucking own!
-
Now at this point of the conversation, I started getting pissed. Why? Because if I've made it clear on MULTIPLE OCCASIONS that your stuff is your stuff and my stuff is mine, and the fact that you're trying to treat the place that I live like it's a fucking junkyard? Are you serious!? Are you fucking kidding me?! But no, that's not what set me the fuck off.
This deep fried cluster of clustered douchebags decides to try to get in my face, in which I rightfully shoved his Jim Carry's crackpipe brother looking bunda some steps back.
-
Jeff: Bruh, are you really gonna try to do me like that? Over some junkfood and shit dude?
Me: YES. "Junkfood and shit" that I PAID FOR.
Jeff: Bro, you're being an asshole dude! This is your house anyways so why the fuck should I have to clean it up!?
Me: BECAUSE YOU LIVE HERE!
Jeff: Doesn't seem like it, after everything I've been doing. You're being an inconsiderate shit bag! Yeah, some friend you're suppose to be.
-
..What? Fucking QUE?! FUCKING NANI!? You've got to be damn kidding me! After making sure he had somewhere to FUCKING LIVE, even sometimes putting his needs before my goddamn own, putting up with all the bullshit and drama that revolves around him, gettingmultiple bail bonds in the past just to keep his mooching rodent mouthed shit faced bunda out of jail, THIS, is what I get!?
"Some friend you're supposed to be". Shenme? Kakiye? Really!?
There were a few mais exchanges of words that damn near led to a fist fight, but it all boiled down to me telling him to call whoever the fuck he needs to and getting the ever living FUCK out my place. I even gave him a fucking option for me to call a taxi for him if that meant him getting out faster. And now the ignorant parasite is gone over to some relative's place. Good fucking riddance.
This is why I don't like people half of the time, because I'm the one disappointed when they turn out to be dipshitted cunt stains on the fabric of my life. I've already got too many problems to deal with as it is, and now it's a few less. Moral of the story: Start being a complete asshole to people. Because the nicer you are, the mais you're going to get walked on. The better of a kind-hearted individual you try to be, the mais it'll be taken for weakness and granted.
And I don't usually wish bad on anybody, but I hope he gets fisted with a paper weight with needles at the ends of them. Fuck'em.
And that concludes my rant. And now I'm going to go grab a drink or two that might mover into three or a few, and maybe get pissy drunk until I crash.
