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posted by alice1919119
This 15 ano old girl used to maintain a common diary with her 13 ano old best friend in which they wrote how they felt about each other and their friendship. When she discovered that her friend who had been a patient of clinical depression had tried to kill herself, she wrote this in the diary and it brought her best friend to tears...
The names have been changed as per author's request...


November 13

Dear Amira,

K so... without going on about any trivial stuff this time, you should know that I've mais than you'd expect to say about stuff I usually don't go on about on phone or in person...

When I heard about your suicide attempt from Jaya and the others, it took some time (visibly an understatement) to process. To be extremely honest, I was hurt... When I finally got everything in my head, I felt extremely hurt...

You most probably didn't tell me because you thought I'd cry, be pissed, be worried to death, or you won't be able to face me anymore, but let me tell you, not telling me was only worse...

Right now, I could go on about how it must be tough on you or try to provide you with solace but I want to be completely honest with you.

Talk to me when you're feeling that way dumbo!! That's exactly what I'm there for! When you called me up and said that the reason you managed to restrain yourself from such an attempt earlier was the feeling that you won't get to talk to me if you died, IT MADE ME HAPPY!! It made me soo happy that I could cry you know! I COULD LITERALLY CRY!

When all this came out the way it wasn't supposed to, I wanted to just.. slap some sense into you... I wanted to slap you soo hard! But then, I realized that the one at fault is me... I am the one who should be slapped, for mais reasons that I'd like to count... I have failed as a best friend - completely failed... Let alone prevention, I couldn't even see through you...

Well now, for goodness' sake, don't go on blaming yourself for this way of thinking of mine! Listen to all my venting! That's the least I expect of you... Of course well, you CAN blame yourself, if you want me to feel worse that is.

Think about it... put yourself in my shoes... Well, ik.. easier said than done...i'm feeling worse than one could imagine right now..

I mean... Miss Amira Sharma! How could you!! You stupid dumbo!! How could you let a stupid bunch of lazy neurons take control over you!! The you I know!!

I don't know shit about this clinical depression crap K? I'm a bloody idiotic dumbass! But seriously dude, I COULD help you tell off those lowlife neurons that Amira Sharma isn't as weak as you useless crappy cells think she is! only if you want me to, that is... You might think that you're weak... But you're not... And if you deny, I'd totally give in to the opinion that my friendship has been useless all along...

K... You might feel like you should die and the world is better off without you, but for once, for goodness' sake, look around... Your mom was sitting seguinte to you crying when you woke up, wasn't she?

You have plenty of things to live for!! Want me to name 3? k!
1. friends & Family
2. One Direction
3. Me...

Damn!I don't remember when was the last time I felt so pissed!

I don't always say it, but dude, you're a BLESSING in my life! I have no idea where I would've been without you around! I wonder if I'd have ever come to know what friendship means if it weren't for you...

Every word I've ever written in this darned diary was straight from my heart!! I wouldn't waste my precious time I could've spent sleeping or watching animê in making that 'Secret Base'* for just some trivial friend...

I don't think I'd understand one BFF post on FB from the ones that we feel are relatable as of now if I hadn't met you!

Don't we always go on about how we're proud of this bond, which is totally different from those girly duos who claim to be best friends and flaunt their pics on social sites just to end up as strangers after a few years...

Okay... I finally feel like I'll HAVE to name a few things you can be proud of... So, here goes...
- your nature
- your face
- your figure
- your voice
- your hair
- your... wait... almost everything ever...
(complimenting you is STILL a drag... I'm sorry XD)

Damn! okay.. After this, I wouldn't mind if you reached the Ayush** level of conceit, I guess...

I wouldn't try to make an effort to keep under control the height of your flight either... Just start flying.

"Being down to earth is great, but being under the earth is nothing close to being good..."

I know stuff is easier said than done... But still, I'll help you start moving forward, step por step, maybe... I'll help you start looking up at yourself dude... You're totally mais amazing than you think you are... You're worth mais than you think you are... (Not every girl gets a reverse harem you know? XD)

A lot of people amor you Amira!! And I'm one of them... God doesn't send a lot of pieces like you down here...

Just smile already!

Didn't you say you won't let me be por myself even if I wanted to? I hope you keep your word...

If you ever feel that way again, CALL ME! And if por any, i.e. 1 in a 1000 chance, I don't pick up, read this diary... or the Secret Base! You can even come over. Or listen to 1D... OR WATCH ANIME!!

Now I wanna sound kinda selfish here, so.. You must know, without you around, I'd be mais lonely that I'd like to imagine... I don't have as many friends as you think I do... :P

I want to keep talking to you about 1D and ANIME!! Forever!!

I want to see our children marrying each other!! XD

Oh come on.. You're just 13... At least consider this... It won't be fun dying off a virgin! XP At least, live a life that satisfies you before dying Amira Sharma!!

(K.. I feel like an old sage all of a sudden...)

FOR THE SAKE OF ME AND MY FUTURE CHILDREN! DONT' DIE!!!
(I'm completely serious here...)

amor ya!


* Secret Base is probably a scrapbook that the author gave Amira as a gift.
** Ayush is someone, probably, the author's brother, who the duo has entitled as completely conceited.

That was it... Please share your thoughts in the comments...
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posted by ShadowFan05
Well, I haven't been on here for 7 months and I still remember my password. lol You guys don't have to worry anymore. I'm still here. Oh my gosh, A bunch of stuff has changed since then. The reason why I haven't been on here for seven months is because:

1. I have a youtube channel now.
2. Because of school.
3. I've been playing Five Nights at Freddy's. ( I've gotten into that now.)
4. I've been busy with my cousin and family.
5. The holidays.
6. Deviant ART has stolen my time to be on here.
7. I have a Steam account.
and 8. My computer has been an idiot lately.

I hope to get mais active on here and get mais pictures up.
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I have made a new-ish series a mês atrás called toxic and admirable fanfic reviews, where i review fanfics! I have many many fãs and many think I am funny! So if you want comedy based bad and good fanfiction reviews, go on Fanfiction.net club and check em out! ^__^

I review the best and the worst in each one, and I amor the support I get from my fans! I also have a youtube channel named jared potts if you're interested. I made a topo, início 10 kirby boss fights video, at 700+ views, so check that out too!

Thanks guys, and as always, Keep it SHADY! :D
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