1) I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
2) Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
3) Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
4) Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
5) Are You Andy or Barney?
6) I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer
7) You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
8) I pay your salary!
9) Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
10) Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
11) I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
12) When the Officer says "Gee Son....Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"
13) What? You need a license to drive?
14) Wow, no wonder your wife sleeps around, with your breath!
15) Is your power a penis substitute?
16) Yes, I know my driving is not 100%, but you have to agree that it is still pretty good for someone who is completely drunk
17) Can you come back in 5 minutes? I'm in the middle of a telephone conversation.
18) Oops...I thought you were a prostitute.
19) Do I have any fruits or vegetables? I don't know. Is cocaine a frutas or vegetable?
20) A hundred dollar fine? Well, I think George Washington can change your mind
21) Did you pull me over because of the drugs under the seat, the body in the trunk, or the burned out tail-light?
22) Whoops, that's the fake one... here ya go, this is the one.
23) Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence
24) Is it true that guys become cops because they can't work at McDonald's ?
25) Thanks Officer, that last cop only gave me a warning, too
26) My gun fell off my lap and got lodged on the gas pedal
27) Hey, is that a 9mm ? That's nothing compared to this .44 magnum!
28) Do you have any idea how much of a hurry I'm in?
29) You're lucky this car needs a tune-up or you'd have never caught me
30) In California we drive like that all the time, what's the problem?
31) If you'd try the stuff I just had, you wouldn't be so damn uptight
32) Aren't there real crooks somewhere you should be catching?
33) Well, those two other guys didn't stop for that school bus either
34) Yes, I saw your lights on, but I thought you going to get a doughnut
35) Just had to try out that new siren, didn't you?
36) Do you have any idea who you're talking to?
37) There's no way I was going 85. I had the cruise set at 80.
38) What's wrong, Ossifer? I swear to drunk I'm not God! And really, there is no blood in my alchohol
39) That uniform makes your bunda look really big.
40) You don't happen to have any cerveja in your car?
41) I was going to be cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
42) So what if I was speeding? Whatcha gonna do about it Mr. Hotshot?
43) I'm not as think as you stoned I am.
44) Officer: "Do you know how fast you were going"
Driver "No I'm too stoned to remember"
45) Its tobacco, honest
46) Hey, i bet i can grab that gun before you finish composição literária my ticket!
47) Officer: Sir, have you been drinking?
>Driver: No, I haven't had any cunts tonight drinkstable.
2) Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
3) Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
4) Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
5) Are You Andy or Barney?
6) I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer
7) You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?
8) I pay your salary!
9) Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
10) Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
11) I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
12) When the Officer says "Gee Son....Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"
13) What? You need a license to drive?
14) Wow, no wonder your wife sleeps around, with your breath!
15) Is your power a penis substitute?
16) Yes, I know my driving is not 100%, but you have to agree that it is still pretty good for someone who is completely drunk
17) Can you come back in 5 minutes? I'm in the middle of a telephone conversation.
18) Oops...I thought you were a prostitute.
19) Do I have any fruits or vegetables? I don't know. Is cocaine a frutas or vegetable?
20) A hundred dollar fine? Well, I think George Washington can change your mind
21) Did you pull me over because of the drugs under the seat, the body in the trunk, or the burned out tail-light?
22) Whoops, that's the fake one... here ya go, this is the one.
23) Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence
24) Is it true that guys become cops because they can't work at McDonald's ?
25) Thanks Officer, that last cop only gave me a warning, too
26) My gun fell off my lap and got lodged on the gas pedal
27) Hey, is that a 9mm ? That's nothing compared to this .44 magnum!
28) Do you have any idea how much of a hurry I'm in?
29) You're lucky this car needs a tune-up or you'd have never caught me
30) In California we drive like that all the time, what's the problem?
31) If you'd try the stuff I just had, you wouldn't be so damn uptight
32) Aren't there real crooks somewhere you should be catching?
33) Well, those two other guys didn't stop for that school bus either
34) Yes, I saw your lights on, but I thought you going to get a doughnut
35) Just had to try out that new siren, didn't you?
36) Do you have any idea who you're talking to?
37) There's no way I was going 85. I had the cruise set at 80.
38) What's wrong, Ossifer? I swear to drunk I'm not God! And really, there is no blood in my alchohol
39) That uniform makes your bunda look really big.
40) You don't happen to have any cerveja in your car?
41) I was going to be cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
42) So what if I was speeding? Whatcha gonna do about it Mr. Hotshot?
43) I'm not as think as you stoned I am.
44) Officer: "Do you know how fast you were going"
Driver "No I'm too stoned to remember"
45) Its tobacco, honest
46) Hey, i bet i can grab that gun before you finish composição literária my ticket!
47) Officer: Sir, have you been drinking?
>Driver: No, I haven't had any cunts tonight drinkstable.
Whoa, time out. Football is on.
Sorry. I was just picturing you naked.
Is there any way we can do this via e-mail?
Don't you have some laundry to do or something?
You are so cute when you get mad.
You're just upset because your bottom is beginning to spread.
Wait a minuto - I get it. What time of the mês is it?
You sure you don't want to consult the great Oprah on this one?
Looks like someone had an extra bowl of cadela, puta flakes this morning!
Who are you kidding? We both know that thing ain't loaded.
Sorry. I was just picturing you naked.
Is there any way we can do this via e-mail?
Don't you have some laundry to do or something?
You are so cute when you get mad.
You're just upset because your bottom is beginning to spread.
Wait a minuto - I get it. What time of the mês is it?
You sure you don't want to consult the great Oprah on this one?
Looks like someone had an extra bowl of cadela, puta flakes this morning!
Who are you kidding? We both know that thing ain't loaded.
☆go in his room and sabotoge it make it a daily thing
☆Show his gf embarrasing pics of him
☆Go into his room at night and say crazy things in his ear make it a daily thing
☆At jantar time quietly throw comida but dont get caught
Bonus if its a chicken bone and it hits him in the head
☆Beat him up to make him say the weirdest stuff like my bunda is fat or i stuff twinkies in my bunda make it a daily thing
☆Ask dumb qs like how in da world did u get a toupeira dat big make it a daily thing
☆Make him do ur chores por lying on him saying stuff like Jason said that he was going to kick my bunda or something like that
☆Tell him to give you a piggy back down stairs make it a daily thing
☆Sit in front of ur brother and talk on the phone act like you heard somthing suprising then do a spit take
☆Sit there and talk about nothing he carez about
By
Tayloraddict-1
Become a fã today
☆Show his gf embarrasing pics of him
☆Go into his room at night and say crazy things in his ear make it a daily thing
☆At jantar time quietly throw comida but dont get caught
Bonus if its a chicken bone and it hits him in the head
☆Beat him up to make him say the weirdest stuff like my bunda is fat or i stuff twinkies in my bunda make it a daily thing
☆Ask dumb qs like how in da world did u get a toupeira dat big make it a daily thing
☆Make him do ur chores por lying on him saying stuff like Jason said that he was going to kick my bunda or something like that
☆Tell him to give you a piggy back down stairs make it a daily thing
☆Sit in front of ur brother and talk on the phone act like you heard somthing suprising then do a spit take
☆Sit there and talk about nothing he carez about
By
Tayloraddict-1
Become a fã today
This is very funny I told some of my friends and they laughed.
Kids, don't try this at início XD
Oh, and anything in between these things ** Is and action.
Oh and on mais thing, I live in NYC, so any references that's why.
1. Shoot me now.
2. *Jumps of Brooklyn Bridge*
3. *Sinks with the Titanic*
4. *Runs away with Prince Charming*
5. *House lands on self in Oz*
6. *Wicked witch turns self into frog*
7. *Frog gets run over*
8. *Frog gets carried away be halk*
9. *Bangs head on mural so hard, knock self into the seguinte room*
10. *Flies into the sun*
11. *Falls off the face of the earth*
12. *Jumps off cliff*
13. *Goes skydiving and forgets parachute*
14 *Dives into tubarão tank*
15. *Glinda the good witch of the north send self home*
16. *Jumps into swamp full of hungry alligators*
17. Newspaper headline - "Magic trick gone wrong: teen disappears!"
18. *Swims in piranha infested waters*
19. *Runs away to Narnia*
20. *Canoes down a waterfall*
Kids, don't try this at início XD
Oh, and anything in between these things ** Is and action.
Oh and on mais thing, I live in NYC, so any references that's why.
1. Shoot me now.
2. *Jumps of Brooklyn Bridge*
3. *Sinks with the Titanic*
4. *Runs away with Prince Charming*
5. *House lands on self in Oz*
6. *Wicked witch turns self into frog*
7. *Frog gets run over*
8. *Frog gets carried away be halk*
9. *Bangs head on mural so hard, knock self into the seguinte room*
10. *Flies into the sun*
11. *Falls off the face of the earth*
12. *Jumps off cliff*
13. *Goes skydiving and forgets parachute*
14 *Dives into tubarão tank*
15. *Glinda the good witch of the north send self home*
16. *Jumps into swamp full of hungry alligators*
17. Newspaper headline - "Magic trick gone wrong: teen disappears!"
18. *Swims in piranha infested waters*
19. *Runs away to Narnia*
20. *Canoes down a waterfall*
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
A fleet of Rebel ships were close to the planet of Sullust. Inside one of the Mon Calamari ships, pilots were preparing their X-Wings. Other ships were carrying Y-Wings, and A-Wings.
Wedge: *Gives a high five to a Y-Wing* We're gonna do just fine.
Y-Wing Pilot: I copy red leader.
They both chuckled, and looked at a pilot in green.
Y-Wing Pilot: Must be one of the pilots for the new A-Wing.
Green-7: Hey. Ready to go?
Wedge: Yeah, you let me know how those A-Wings are. I might try one myself.
Green-7: Will do....
