aleatório Club
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--I really don't like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired.
--I used to come here all the time with my ex.
--I never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldn't hurt to consider it.
--Could you excuse me? My cat gets lonely if he doesn't hear my voice on the answering machine every hour.
---I really feel that I've grown in the past few years. Used to be I wouldn't have given someone like you a segundo look.
--And I won that trophy in the inter-fraternity belching contest.
--It's been tough, but I've come to accept that most people I encontro, data just won't be as smart as I am.
lol
added by Usui--takumi
added by wantadog
added by Usui--takumi
Source: cute
added by Dont-Look-Back
added by ChocoLuvr101
Source: Tumblr
added by smileypop9
added by Elizabeth-14
added by soraroxasxion
added by TDI_Izzy
Source: google
posted by PftFan99
Once I was leitura online... It said that people with brown eyes are.. are.. ZOMBIES! I got really scared so I turned to my friend but SHE had brown eyes. " Ahhhh! ZOMBIEEE!!!" I ran outside. I looked back and she had followed me. "AHHH!" I turned around and WALKED into a pizza comprar like nothing had happened. I was at the counter ordering the pizza when I heard the door open and a low voice saying," PIIZZZAAA!!!" I turned around and yelled," AAAHHH ZOMBIE IN DA HOUSSEE! EVERYONE HIDE YO KID! HIDE YO WIFE! HIDE YO HUSBAND AND GET OUTTA HERE!" I sat down and ate pizza. Om nom nom. She came up to me and said," PIZZZAAA" I turned and looked at her and yelled," AHHH ZOMBIE DONT STEAL MY PIZZA." I grabbed my pizza and ran out the door. I saw a hobo and threw it on its head. She came outside and said," HOOOOBOOO" and ran after it. I said," FINALLY FREE!" I jumped in the lake and said," yaayy!1! LAke! Make me a sammich!"
A lot of people use the word believe in their songs, but believe me, im going to be using believe a lot mais than you can believe!! XD lol jk comments reccommended. (i texted all this on my phone and saved it as a draft one time after school, so...) ^^'

~~~Believe~~~

A world where only you can,
Break the fear.
No chance to save the world then,
So jump the pier.
Makes everyone feel better...
Makes everyone feel better...

Tame the evil that's inside,
Let the night make you feel alive,
For there is only one for you,
Your time is finally overdue...
It's overdue...!

CH: Desperation hits a nerve,
When no one hears...
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posted by brooki
Do you ever hate it when its 11:30 on a school night and you cant go to sleep?


Do you ever hate the guy who invented clocks cause it seems to go faster than its supposed to?


Do you ever hate everything around you?


Do you ever hate big-deal award shows that come on late so that you end up being wide awake at 12, 1 o'clock in the morning?


Do you ever hate waking up too dagum early for school?





sorry. im just really mad right now. i hate all of these things. at the moment.
posted by patrisha727
More is coming.....




The word "Nazi" is actually an abbreviation. The party's full name was the Nazionalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterpartel.

Pinocchio is Italian for "pine eyes."

The word "queue" is the only word in the English language that is still pronounced the same way when the last four letters are removed.

The word "toast," meaning a proposal of health, originated in Rome, where an actual bit of spiced, burned pão was dropped into wine to improve the drink's flavor, absorb its sediment, and thus make it mais healthful.

The word "bookkeeper" is the only word in the English language...
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posted by wild-bby
Below I have written a aleatório diary entry of a young couple.

Her Diary

Saturday night I thought he was atuação wierd. We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with my friends all dia long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment. Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed but kept quiet and absent. I asked him what was wrong and he said nothing. I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry. On the way início I told...
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posted by Jackimo17
Whats green and looks like a lettuce? (A lettuce)
Whats green and looks like a alface but is not a lettuce? (A picture of a lettuce)
Whats green, looks like a alface but is not a alface and not a picture of a lettuce? (A picture of a picture of a lettuce)

Why did the naughty little boy attack the teacher? (Because that’s what naughty little boys do)

Why did the boy wash his hands? (Because they were dirty)
Why didn’t the boy wash his hands? (Because they were clean)
Why didn’t the naughty little boy wash his hands? (Because they were dirty and he wanted to give his sister rabies)

Why did...
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added by tanyya
video
big
bouncing
inflatable
green
ball
youtube
nigahiga
funny
short
hilarious
added by frylock243
Source: Me :)
added by Bella_Dhampir
Source: Tumblr People (their names are on the pic, usually)
added by hetalianstella