Episode 8: The Secret Unicorn Club
June 1, 1951
Honey had just finished bringing a train into Cheyenne. She was going to wait for her seguinte assignment at the station, when she saw a sign.
Honey: The secret unicorn club?
Gordon: That's right, and if you're not a unicorn you can't join.
Honey: Who would want to cadastrar-se your club anyway?
Jeff: Me.
Coffee Creme: Me too.
Honey: What for?
Jeff: He's offering us free things, like comida and alcohol.
Gordon: Too bad you're not a unicorn. Leave!
Honey: Fine, I'll leave. But I just want you to know that this is a dumb idea *walks away*
Passengers: *walking toward station*
Gordon: Any passengers that aren't a unicorn must go around this building to get to wherever it is they need to go.
Earth ponies: Fuck!! *walks around station*
Pegasi: *fly*
Meanwhile, Honey went to meet with Hawkeye, Red Rose, Percy, and Orion.
Percy: I can't believe Jeff joined that club.
Hawkeye: I can't believe Coffee Creme joined too. If only unicórnios are allowed, how is this railway going to make mais money?
Orion: What do you mean?
Honey: He means only unicórnios can go in the station.
Orion: Welp, we're screwed.
Pete: No, they're screwed.
Hawkeye: Uh, sir? How long have you been eavesdropping on us?
Pete: Long enough to hear that Gordon is fucking things up for our railroad.
Red Rose: Well, that's good enough.
Pete: Now listen, here's what we'll do
But before Pete could discuss his plan, Coffee Creme, and Jeff teleported near them. Coffee Creme looked sick.
Coffee Creme: Oh, that burger was horrible, and I thought nothing could be worse then McDonalds!
Jeff: Gordon is a terrible cook. He tried cooking hamburgers on a grill, and he did them too well.
Pete: I hope no one got hurt, even though Coffee Creme is sick, but I'm not sure if you can get hurt from being sick.
Honey: I don't think so sir.
Hawkeye: We gotta stop Gordon from being a asshole!
Jeff: So just like the last three times?
Hawkeye: Yeah, pretty much.
Pete: Ok, well here's the plan.
Five minutos later
Pete: What we need to do is hire a new unicorn, and get him to find out about what Gordon is up to.
Orion: Like a spy?
Pete: Yup.
Bartholomew: *teleports seguinte to Pete*
Pete: This is our new worker, Bartholomew Perfect the 55th. He's british, so don't make fun of him for that.
Coffee Creme: Uh, nopony makes fun of the british at all.
Pete: Ok then. Good luck *walks away*
Hawkeye: Hello Bartholo- lomr- mew
Bartholomew: *laughs* You don't have to call me por my full name. Bart will do nicely.
Hawkeye: Oh, hi Bart.
Bartholomew: Hello. I must say, it shall be interesting working on an Equestrian railway. In the United Kingdom we had nothing like what you've got. Your railways are mais modern.
Jeff: Thanks. But listen, you really gotta go to Gordon's secret unicorn club. We need to know about what we're dealing with here.
Bartholomew: Oh yes, of course. What do you need me to do?
At the station
Gordon: *sleeping*
Bartholomew: Hello.
Gordon: AH, Winston Churchill!! *sees Bartholomew* Oh. Uh, what do you want?
Bartholomew: I wanted to cadastrar-se your secret unicorn club.
Gordon: Oh yeah. Sure. Welcome.
Hawkeye: Ok, he's in.
Pete: Now get ready for the attack.
Hawkeye: Attack?
Red Rose: We're going to kill him?
Pete: NO!! Nopony is going to die!!
Gordon: Haha! Listen to that. The sound of arguing earth ponies.
Bartholomew: Yes, at least we unicórnios are civilized.
Gordon: True, true. *drinking beer*
Police pony: Hey!! What are you doing?
Gordon: Me?
Police: Yes you! It says no alcoholic beverages in the station!!
Gordon: Well I'm not in the station! I'm on the platform, sitting in a chair, with a grill!!
Police pony: You can't have any of that on the platform. You're underarrest *arrests Gordon*
Jeff: Haha!! Gordon got arrested!
Pete: Yeah, but I wanted to punish him! We gotta bust him out.
Gordon was in the Cheyenne Jailhouse.
Cellmate: Hey.
Gordon: Hi.
Cellmate: Hey.
Gordon: Hello!
Cellmate: Hey.
Gordon: Do you always say the same thing to a pónei, pônei 75 times in a row?
Police officer: Hey, shut the fuck up in there.
Gordon: What did I do?! I start a club, then get arrested for having things for the club, and now I'm getting in trouble for being bothered por another pony?!!?!?!?!?
Police: You were talking.
Gordon: He was talking too!!
Cellmate: Hey.
Police: Hello Bob.
Gordon: What the fuck?
Police: Watch your language loser!
Gordon: You just told me to shut the fuck up!
Police: No I didn't *walks away*
Gordon: I'm pretty sure you did!
Police: I never say anything cruel to anypony.
At the entrance of the jailhouse.
Pete: Excuse me. Is there anypony here named Gordon? I'd like to bail him out.
Police pony: That'll be Fourty dollars, and twelve bits.
Pete: *pays officer*
Gordon: *sees Pete*
Police pony: Ok Gordon. You can go now.
Gordon: Yes! Thank you *runs away*
Pete: Wait up! *chases Gordon*
Gordon, and Pete soon got back at the station
Gordon: Thank you for getting me out of there!
Pete: No problem, but you gotta do me a favor.
Gordon: What's that?
Pete: Get rid of your secret unicorn club. It sounds stupid.
Gordon: But it's great. We have drinks, cook outs, and-
Pete: You got arrested for it.
Gordon: All I wanted was some peace, and quiet!
Pete: Well all you had to do was simply ask.
Gordon: Simply asking makes my head hurt.
Pete: Well that's something you'll have to deal with. There are sometimes when you have to think of others. If you keep thinking about yourself, you're not just hurting everyone's feelings, but you're also hurting yourself.
Gordon: How so?
Pete: You're hurting yourself por getting rid of all the ponies you care about.
Gordon: And those are?
Pete: Screw it. Why do I even bother to be around you? *walks away*
Gordon: Now I know the feeling *walks away*
Gordon went to everypony
Gordon: I wanna apologize for being mean to you. Can you all forgive me?
Jeff: No.
Gordon: Holy shit! I just apologized!
Jeff: *laughs* Just joking with you Gordon. Of course we forgive you.
Hawkeye: You may be an asshole at times, but deep down, you're a good pony.
Coffee Creme: I still don't understand why you hate steam engines.
Gordon: I don't hate them, I just think diesels are better.
Hawkeye: Well, let me just say that these steam engines will never be replaced!
Ten years later
Hawkeye: *sees diesels* Great. Ten years ago, I said some things that would eventually become a lie.
The end
On the seguinte episode of ponies on the rails
Bartholomew conducts Hawkeye's train.
June 1, 1951
Honey had just finished bringing a train into Cheyenne. She was going to wait for her seguinte assignment at the station, when she saw a sign.
Honey: The secret unicorn club?
Gordon: That's right, and if you're not a unicorn you can't join.
Honey: Who would want to cadastrar-se your club anyway?
Jeff: Me.
Coffee Creme: Me too.
Honey: What for?
Jeff: He's offering us free things, like comida and alcohol.
Gordon: Too bad you're not a unicorn. Leave!
Honey: Fine, I'll leave. But I just want you to know that this is a dumb idea *walks away*
Passengers: *walking toward station*
Gordon: Any passengers that aren't a unicorn must go around this building to get to wherever it is they need to go.
Earth ponies: Fuck!! *walks around station*
Pegasi: *fly*
Meanwhile, Honey went to meet with Hawkeye, Red Rose, Percy, and Orion.
Percy: I can't believe Jeff joined that club.
Hawkeye: I can't believe Coffee Creme joined too. If only unicórnios are allowed, how is this railway going to make mais money?
Orion: What do you mean?
Honey: He means only unicórnios can go in the station.
Orion: Welp, we're screwed.
Pete: No, they're screwed.
Hawkeye: Uh, sir? How long have you been eavesdropping on us?
Pete: Long enough to hear that Gordon is fucking things up for our railroad.
Red Rose: Well, that's good enough.
Pete: Now listen, here's what we'll do
But before Pete could discuss his plan, Coffee Creme, and Jeff teleported near them. Coffee Creme looked sick.
Coffee Creme: Oh, that burger was horrible, and I thought nothing could be worse then McDonalds!
Jeff: Gordon is a terrible cook. He tried cooking hamburgers on a grill, and he did them too well.
Pete: I hope no one got hurt, even though Coffee Creme is sick, but I'm not sure if you can get hurt from being sick.
Honey: I don't think so sir.
Hawkeye: We gotta stop Gordon from being a asshole!
Jeff: So just like the last three times?
Hawkeye: Yeah, pretty much.
Pete: Ok, well here's the plan.
Five minutos later
Pete: What we need to do is hire a new unicorn, and get him to find out about what Gordon is up to.
Orion: Like a spy?
Pete: Yup.
Bartholomew: *teleports seguinte to Pete*
Pete: This is our new worker, Bartholomew Perfect the 55th. He's british, so don't make fun of him for that.
Coffee Creme: Uh, nopony makes fun of the british at all.
Pete: Ok then. Good luck *walks away*
Hawkeye: Hello Bartholo- lomr- mew
Bartholomew: *laughs* You don't have to call me por my full name. Bart will do nicely.
Hawkeye: Oh, hi Bart.
Bartholomew: Hello. I must say, it shall be interesting working on an Equestrian railway. In the United Kingdom we had nothing like what you've got. Your railways are mais modern.
Jeff: Thanks. But listen, you really gotta go to Gordon's secret unicorn club. We need to know about what we're dealing with here.
Bartholomew: Oh yes, of course. What do you need me to do?
At the station
Gordon: *sleeping*
Bartholomew: Hello.
Gordon: AH, Winston Churchill!! *sees Bartholomew* Oh. Uh, what do you want?
Bartholomew: I wanted to cadastrar-se your secret unicorn club.
Gordon: Oh yeah. Sure. Welcome.
Hawkeye: Ok, he's in.
Pete: Now get ready for the attack.
Hawkeye: Attack?
Red Rose: We're going to kill him?
Pete: NO!! Nopony is going to die!!
Gordon: Haha! Listen to that. The sound of arguing earth ponies.
Bartholomew: Yes, at least we unicórnios are civilized.
Gordon: True, true. *drinking beer*
Police pony: Hey!! What are you doing?
Gordon: Me?
Police: Yes you! It says no alcoholic beverages in the station!!
Gordon: Well I'm not in the station! I'm on the platform, sitting in a chair, with a grill!!
Police pony: You can't have any of that on the platform. You're underarrest *arrests Gordon*
Jeff: Haha!! Gordon got arrested!
Pete: Yeah, but I wanted to punish him! We gotta bust him out.
Gordon was in the Cheyenne Jailhouse.
Cellmate: Hey.
Gordon: Hi.
Cellmate: Hey.
Gordon: Hello!
Cellmate: Hey.
Gordon: Do you always say the same thing to a pónei, pônei 75 times in a row?
Police officer: Hey, shut the fuck up in there.
Gordon: What did I do?! I start a club, then get arrested for having things for the club, and now I'm getting in trouble for being bothered por another pony?!!?!?!?!?
Police: You were talking.
Gordon: He was talking too!!
Cellmate: Hey.
Police: Hello Bob.
Gordon: What the fuck?
Police: Watch your language loser!
Gordon: You just told me to shut the fuck up!
Police: No I didn't *walks away*
Gordon: I'm pretty sure you did!
Police: I never say anything cruel to anypony.
At the entrance of the jailhouse.
Pete: Excuse me. Is there anypony here named Gordon? I'd like to bail him out.
Police pony: That'll be Fourty dollars, and twelve bits.
Pete: *pays officer*
Gordon: *sees Pete*
Police pony: Ok Gordon. You can go now.
Gordon: Yes! Thank you *runs away*
Pete: Wait up! *chases Gordon*
Gordon, and Pete soon got back at the station
Gordon: Thank you for getting me out of there!
Pete: No problem, but you gotta do me a favor.
Gordon: What's that?
Pete: Get rid of your secret unicorn club. It sounds stupid.
Gordon: But it's great. We have drinks, cook outs, and-
Pete: You got arrested for it.
Gordon: All I wanted was some peace, and quiet!
Pete: Well all you had to do was simply ask.
Gordon: Simply asking makes my head hurt.
Pete: Well that's something you'll have to deal with. There are sometimes when you have to think of others. If you keep thinking about yourself, you're not just hurting everyone's feelings, but you're also hurting yourself.
Gordon: How so?
Pete: You're hurting yourself por getting rid of all the ponies you care about.
Gordon: And those are?
Pete: Screw it. Why do I even bother to be around you? *walks away*
Gordon: Now I know the feeling *walks away*
Gordon went to everypony
Gordon: I wanna apologize for being mean to you. Can you all forgive me?
Jeff: No.
Gordon: Holy shit! I just apologized!
Jeff: *laughs* Just joking with you Gordon. Of course we forgive you.
Hawkeye: You may be an asshole at times, but deep down, you're a good pony.
Coffee Creme: I still don't understand why you hate steam engines.
Gordon: I don't hate them, I just think diesels are better.
Hawkeye: Well, let me just say that these steam engines will never be replaced!
Ten years later
Hawkeye: *sees diesels* Great. Ten years ago, I said some things that would eventually become a lie.
The end
On the seguinte episode of ponies on the rails
Bartholomew conducts Hawkeye's train.
Well.. I'll say Sword was right about it being sad again.
But that would lead too him say
"I told you so"
And I'll say
"Don't have too rub it in"
And he'll say
"Yes I do"
And than he'll pour coffee onto me.
And I'll say
"Dick"
And he'll say
"Thank you"
either way.. I'm enjoying the funny episode while I can. Before I have too start crying again.
This show is doing anything it can too depress us. Like it's the shows job.. Too kick us in the balls and say "Life sucks, deal with it"
The show is an asshole.
But that would lead too him say
"I told you so"
And I'll say
"Don't have too rub it in"
And he'll say
"Yes I do"
And than he'll pour coffee onto me.
And I'll say
"Dick"
And he'll say
"Thank you"
either way.. I'm enjoying the funny episode while I can. Before I have too start crying again.
This show is doing anything it can too depress us. Like it's the shows job.. Too kick us in the balls and say "Life sucks, deal with it"
The show is an asshole.
So.. Here's another review..
The strory Nina reads is weird.. Especially the way she reads it.
I'd say I understand it now. But.. I don't.
This so is so confusing.
But hey. It's like THE ACCOUNTANT. I had no idea what exactly happened, just watched for the gun fights, and was happy.
This show has kind of animation.. All animê have that sort of odd animation, where people look like pictures, not normal people at times.
But hey.. Good episodes I guess.. The hitman seems dead. Guess now Johan actually has too "do stuff", witch must suck for him xD
The strory Nina reads is weird.. Especially the way she reads it.
I'd say I understand it now. But.. I don't.
This so is so confusing.
But hey. It's like THE ACCOUNTANT. I had no idea what exactly happened, just watched for the gun fights, and was happy.
This show has kind of animation.. All animê have that sort of odd animation, where people look like pictures, not normal people at times.
But hey.. Good episodes I guess.. The hitman seems dead. Guess now Johan actually has too "do stuff", witch must suck for him xD
I think I seen episode 9 before.
Well, at least the scene where Todd discovers the truth of his rock opera.
It's funnier now that I know what he's actually talking about.
Aaron paul's voice is so funny when having a character like Todd trying to actually "think".
And the fact it WASN'T revenge, is too funny.
I amor you Todd..
Anyway.. The show is certainly a lot deeper now.
Sometimes it's a good thing.. But sometimes it's a depressing thing.. Mixes between those things.
We're almost done season 1 anyway, seguinte week cadastrar-se me for the conclusion of season 1..
Well, at least the scene where Todd discovers the truth of his rock opera.
It's funnier now that I know what he's actually talking about.
Aaron paul's voice is so funny when having a character like Todd trying to actually "think".
And the fact it WASN'T revenge, is too funny.
I amor you Todd..
Anyway.. The show is certainly a lot deeper now.
Sometimes it's a good thing.. But sometimes it's a depressing thing.. Mixes between those things.
We're almost done season 1 anyway, seguinte week cadastrar-se me for the conclusion of season 1..
#1: KORN:
When you think about, it, a name like Korn dosen't really make you think of flores and sunshine xD.
And the songs prove this.
I amor them (obviously). But these songs are cantar about murder, possible necrophilia, sex addictions, rape, lying, just about EVERY bad thing there is..
#2: DISTURBED:
The name probably says it all xD.
#3: EMINEM:
If these songs really ARE of his life, it certainly makes us realize, OUR problems (chores, going to work in the morning), aren't SHIT!
#4: rosa, -de-rosa FLOYD:
These songs are a lot darker then people might think..
#5: SLIPKNOT:
With a album called "all hope is lost" how much happiness would one be expecting!?
When you think about, it, a name like Korn dosen't really make you think of flores and sunshine xD.
And the songs prove this.
I amor them (obviously). But these songs are cantar about murder, possible necrophilia, sex addictions, rape, lying, just about EVERY bad thing there is..
#2: DISTURBED:
The name probably says it all xD.
#3: EMINEM:
If these songs really ARE of his life, it certainly makes us realize, OUR problems (chores, going to work in the morning), aren't SHIT!
#4: rosa, -de-rosa FLOYD:
These songs are a lot darker then people might think..
#5: SLIPKNOT:
With a album called "all hope is lost" how much happiness would one be expecting!?