alice cullen Club
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posted by AliceHaleCullen
10. Take her credit cards and shopping vouchers, hold them above your head and tell her to “jump for it”.

9. Tell her if she was just a few centimetres shorter she could legally be a midget.

8. Wear the trashiest possible clothing whenever you can.

7. Tie her up in a straightjacket. When she protests, tell her she needs to go back to the loony bin.

6. When you go into the sun with her, fall into a twitching heap on the ground and moan “I’m melting.”

5. Pelt her with cloves of garlic.

4. When she gets a vision, ask if her “spidey senses” are tingling.

3. Trip her up and ask if she saw it coming.

2. Ask her what you will be doing in five minutos every ten minutes.

And the Number One way to annoy Alice Cullen?

1. Email her dozens of application forms for the position of speaker on psychic hotlines.
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Carlisle: Hello Miss.Swan.

Bella: Oh hello...I didn't notice you there.

Carlisle: Oh that's okay.

Bella: Were you running?

Carlisle: Maybe. I thought I heard noises.

Bella: Sorry about that I just needed to go to the bathroom.

Carlisle:...

Bella: Yeah...sorry. I'll see you in morning.

Carlisle:...yes dear.

Bella: Good night. I hope you will get any sleep.

Carlisle: Well thank you. I don't know if I would get any sleep in cause I am vampire. You already know that. Right?

Bella: What? You're vampire too?!

Carlisle: Didn't Edward tell you? Oh no...

Bella: Haha that's okay I already know. I am just...
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