Mare: *Pushing a shopping carrinho through a supermarket* Excuse me sir.
Store Worker: Yes ma'am?
Mare: What's the saltiest salt in your lineup of salt?
Store Worker: Salt Lake salt from Salt Lake City. May I make a suggestion?
Mare: Yes.
Store Worker: Have you ever been to Salt Lake City?
Mare: No.
Store Worker: Well you better get going now, because Tom Foolery's performing at the Horseshoe, the city's newest place for standup comedy routine.
Mare: How do you know Tom Foolery's going to be there?
Store Worker: Because. *Rips off his disguise, revealing himself to be Tom Foolery* He's me. *Gives the mare a ticket* Enjoy the show. *Runs through the back of the supermarket, and gets on a round stage*
The blue unicorn was surrounded por crowds of ponies cheering, awaiting a comedy routine.
Tom: *Looks around, seeing the thousands of ponies cheering for him* Good morning, and thank you for joining me!
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Look at this, we all left our house to get somewhere. Could you imagine if we got every single pónei, pônei on the planet to leave their house, then make it here all at the same time?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: It would be very easy if nopony got vaccinated.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: What do you think would happen if all of us were dead? Would we reappear 300 years later, and start over from the stone age?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: We could definitely improve on a few things that several ponies despise. Like the presidential election.
Crowd: *Clapping while laughing*
Tom: During my 1st show in St. Foalis, I said I don't vote because I don't trust anyone. Two months later, the capitol building in Washington DC was raided por angry protestors who were not happy with the Democrats fucking over the Republicans, and miscounting the votes.
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Instead of just standing there and shouting, they should have at least tried to kill Joe Biden. They missed a perfect opportunity.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: In my last show I also thought of a good way to improve the fairness of the presidential election. Instead of relying on misguided idiots to make the selection on who our leader should be, we take all the candidates into a special room.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And in that special room you let the candidates duke it out in....Sudden death!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Whoever kills the other candidates gets to become president, but it doesn't end there. In another special room, you have an obstacle course!
Crowd: *Cheering while clapping*
Tom: With spikes, dynamite, holes filled with crocodiles, balancing boards that mover por themselves, and dozens of other challenging obstacles that would make even the toughest drill sergeant cry to their mom in horror!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: All surrounded por fire.
Crowd: *Laughing, cheering, and clapping*
Tom: And only then, you will become president of the United States of Equestria. But after going through all that crap, I don't think you would want to be president anymore.
Crowd: *Clapping, whistling, and cheering*
2 B Continued
so here are a few theories i got for this show:
Theory #1: since Hasbro and DHX never even bothered to give Cozy Glow any semblance of a backstory, my theory is that she's actually a fully-grown adult pónei, pônei stuck inside a filly's body. she was born with a condition that never let her physically age after filly-hood.
Theory #2: while we do know Sunset used to be Celestia's topo, início student, i always thought there was something mais to it than just a teacher-student relationship. and since we never get to see if Sunset had parents at some point in time, my theory is that she's Celestia's adopted daughter. remember how worried Celestia was about Sunset at the end of the first EqG movie? yeah, something tells me they're mais than just teacher and ex-student.
Theory #3: at one point in time, King Sombra used to be a great and loved king, before he became corrupted por his desire for power that forced Celestia and Luna to banish him into the abyss.
Theory #1: since Hasbro and DHX never even bothered to give Cozy Glow any semblance of a backstory, my theory is that she's actually a fully-grown adult pónei, pônei stuck inside a filly's body. she was born with a condition that never let her physically age after filly-hood.
Theory #2: while we do know Sunset used to be Celestia's topo, início student, i always thought there was something mais to it than just a teacher-student relationship. and since we never get to see if Sunset had parents at some point in time, my theory is that she's Celestia's adopted daughter. remember how worried Celestia was about Sunset at the end of the first EqG movie? yeah, something tells me they're mais than just teacher and ex-student.
Theory #3: at one point in time, King Sombra used to be a great and loved king, before he became corrupted por his desire for power that forced Celestia and Luna to banish him into the abyss.