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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Arthur Grossman
Arthur Grossman
At Canterlot Highway Patrol headquarters, an officer named Arthur Grossman was showing everypony a new watch he bought.

Arthur: I got a coupon that allowed me to get 30% off. This watch is made out of 24 karat gold.
CHP Ponies: Whoa. Cool.
Jon: Where did you get a watch like that?
Arthur: At this store across the rua from the train station. I amor this thing.
Frank: You better be careful out there on your motorcycle. We wouldn't want to see you hitting the pavement, and ruining that lovely watch.
Arthur: I'll be fine.
Sargent Getraer: *Arrives* Okay everypony, sit down, and be quiet.

When everyone sat down, the sarge made his announcement.

Sargent Getraer: I was told por Princess Celestia that she's using one of her royal guards as an informant. He's joined a group of seven ponies that are making plans to hijack five cars. We need to be alert, and make sure we catch those car thieves. The cars on the list are a Corvette Z06. A 2016 Ford mustang Shelby GT350. An SRT Viper, a Dodge Ram, and a Volkswagen Beetle Rally car. They're all brand new, and high performance vehicles. That's it, so happy hunting.
Jesse: *Arrives late*
Sargent Getraer: Ah, Jesse Neighbor. You're too late, you just missed the meeting.
Jebediah: *Arrives*
Sargent Getraer: Jebediah Turner, you're late as well.
Jebediah: Sorry sarge.
Sargent Getraer: *Looks at the other officers* You can all go now. Jesse, and Jebediah are going to stay here for a while.
CHP Officers: *Leave the room*
Jesse & Jebediah: *Staring at Sargent Getraer*
Sargent Getraer: Now why were you late?
Jebediah: I had to help a mare change a flat tire on her car.
Jesse: I was in the middle of composição literária a ticket for someone speeding.
Sargent Getraer: Alright, well seguinte time, try to get to the meetings before they start. We can't waste any time waiting for you. Now get back to work.
Jebediah: Will do sarge. *Leaves*
Jesse: Sure thing *Leaves*

Meanwhile, in an abandoned warehouse, Gordon was talking to his friends. He wears a neck brace, because he has problems with his neck.

Gordon: *Turns a song on: link * Okay everypony, gather around! We're gonna discuss the plan on stealing those cars.
Master Sword: *Walks over and sits down with every bad pony* What is it?
Gordon: I found out there was an informant, and so far, I got Tom, and Howard to get rid of him. So here's what we're gonna do. Our first car that we'll steal will be the Corvette. It's further away from Celestia's castle, so none of her royal guards will be able to catch us.
Master Sword: Seems simple.
Gordon: Of course it does. Leaf Pile!!
Leaf: Yes sir.
Gordon: You're stealing the Corvette. Get ready.
Leaf: I'm on it.
Gordon: *Goes to his car* I'll give you a ride over there.
Leaf Pile: *Sits in the passenger seat*
Gordon: *Drives the car*

2 B Continued
 Jesse Neighbor
Jesse Neighbor
 Jebediah Turner
Jebediah Turner
 Gordon
Gordon
 Leaf Pile
Leaf Pile
 Gordon's car
Gordon's car
added by tinkerbell66799
Source: Original Owners (NOT ME!!)
added by LavenderLily
Source: To their rightful owners
added by tinkerbell66799
Source: Original Owners... NOT ME
posted by Canada24
Two weeks after we last left off.

Today was the day, Ditto was suppose to come.

"I still can't believe we have to do this" Dash groaned, her nose still bandaged and she hovered over them.

"Hey, it's not our call, it's Celestia's" Twilight told the young Pegasus.

"Fine" Dash groaned.

"Lets just hope he dosen't try anything" She added.

Everyone agreed.

Eventually Celestia flew down in her carriage, carrying Ditto in it as well.

"Ahh, there you are" Twilight said.

Celestia noded and got out of the carriage, and took Ditto out of it also, who looked not at all pleased about being here.

Twilight and the others...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
Dan and Shadow house in Ponyville
Shadow : YOU HAVE SOMETHING!
Dan : YES... yes shut up... I need to think... *grab book* this book say that in our familly was pónei, pônei named "Jack the Puppet master"
Shadow : and you want to heal yourself with puppets?
Dan : pfff no... that guy had strange power of controlling puppets without strings...
Shadow : laaame... NEXT!
Dan : Is just gonna be my "help in battle" with my inside me...
Shadow : your evil you?
Dan : yep... one pónei, pônei from our familly had same situation but he beat his bad side and it was end... we need to go to the Canterlot Garden...
Canterlot Garden...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Con, and Ms. Bonjour were on topo, início of the train while Fenix was in his car calling the police.

Fenix: That's right. They're on topo, início of a train, and one of them is an agent of the C.I.E. Please, you've got to help him.
Police: Ok, we'll send some units to try, and stop whoever is killing your friend.

On the train.

Ms. Bonjour: *kicks Con*
Con: *Nearly falls off*
Ms. Bonjour: Au Revoir Mr. Mane.
Con: *Climbs back on*
Ms. Bonjour: Grrr. *Hits Con*
Con: *Punches Ms. Bonjour*
Ms. Bonjour: *lays on roof*
Con: *Kicks Ms. Bonjour*
Ms. Bonjour: Signal!
Con: *gets hit por signal*
Ms. Bonjour: Hahahaha!
Con: *Falls...
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Welcome back, everypony. The last we saw our heroes, they were receiving recognition from the four princesses of Equestria. We then turned to deep within the Everfree Forest, where King Sombra lay dormant. Red Rose, who aided in the killing of King Cobra, brought the news to her fallen fiancee. queen Chrysalis has allied with King Sombra, and we cadastrar-se them making their way through the forest.

King Sombra: How many do you have in your army, Chrysalis?

Queen Chrysalis: (cackling) Thousands, not including the ones currently hidden within Canterlot and the Chrystal Empire.

King Sombra: Excellent! How...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
Dan : but... but... but... JADE!
Jade : hell yea...
Shadow : wait a second... but... you was in Africa
Jade : I heard that guys kicking your bunda soo...
Shadow : oh well...
Dan : but... how... where... WHAAAT!
Jade : no time to lose lets GO!
Yes its her, best double agent in the world, If she wants to kick our corp. asses... she gonna DO IT... but she with us now...
Dan : you right!
Everypony start running to the small hallway and they jump into truck
Jade : GO GO GO!
Driver : *move truck*
The truck goes to the city then to the black alley
Dan : Jade... where w-
Jade : *put gun to Dan Head* shut up! now...
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My Little Pony, My Little Pony,
What is friendship all about?
My Little Pony, My Little Pony,
Friendship is magic!
My Little Pony,
I used to wonder what friendship could be,
My Little Pony,
until you all shared it's magic with me!
When I was young I was too busy to make any friends, some silliness did not seem worth the effort it expands,
but my little ponies. you opened up my eyes,
and now the truth's crystal clear, as splendid as summer skies,
and it's such a wonderful surprise,
My Little Pony,
I used to wonder what friendship could be,
My Little Pony,
until you all shared it's magic with me!
When danger...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Sunset Shimmer's car, stolen por Braeburn
Sunset Shimmer's car, stolen by Braeburn
Braeburn was out of the tournament, and was very angry.

Sergi: *parks car*
Braeburn: *walks toward Sergi's car*
Apyr: We got company
Braeburn: *carrying baseball bat*
Sergi: Well, we're outta here *floors it*
Braeburn: Oh no you don't!! *runs to car* Give me your car!!
Sunset Shimmer: No, get lost!
Braeburn: *hits Sunset Shimmer with bat*
Sunset Shimmer: *Knocked Out*
Braeburn: *steals car*

Sergi was driving toward the highway out of Canterlot

Braeburn: *gets behind Sergi*
Apyr: Are you kidding me?
Sergi: What's the matter?
Apyr: Braeburn is following us!
Braeburn: GET BACK HERE!!
Police: *sees car chase*...
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posted by NeonInfernoLord
Funny how a town filled with so much joy could befall to such a deadly game…

It was total darkness in…wherever she was. Her eyes adjusted somewhat to it but as far as she knew she was in a hole. She tried to mover but she realized her entire lower body was encased inside of something. It was so snug until the point that she couldn't even feel her lower body.

"H-hello!? Rarity!? Scootaloo!?" Sweetie Belle screamed out but couldn't make anything out in the vacant abyss. She let out little whimpers as another voice rang from her side.

"S-sweetie Belle, I'm right here!" The voice of Scootaloo rang...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
A lot of people think Moonraker is the worst Bond film, but what about Nightmare Moonraker?

We begin in western europe, as an airplane with ponies that are learning to skydive is flying 30,000 feet above the air

Russian pony: I have never done this before. Have you?
Con: No.
Russian pony: Oh you from United States of Equestria?
Con: Yeah. So is this pónei, pônei
Luna: Hi.
Russian pony: Hello *casts a spell*
Con: What are you doing?
Russian pony: *turns luna evil*
Nightmare moon: *grabs parachutes*
Con: What did you do?
Russian pony: I turned Luna evil!
Con: You sick asshole *hits russian*
Russian pony:...
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Hello. I have been hearing from a lot of bronies that Princess Celestia is a troll. There are a lot of reasons to mark that, so I will show you them.

Reason one: In The Ticket Master, she gave Twilight Sparkle only two tickets when she already knew that she has 5 friends. Twilight Sparkle was stressing out for nothing in the end.

Reason two: When Twilight Sparkle was talking to Princess Celestia about when she banished Luna to the moon, Celestia tried to change the subject, saying, ''Go make some friends!''. This redirected her attention.

Reason three: In the episode Bird In A Hoof, Mrs. Cake...
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*This story shall be divided into two parts, both of them bearing a similar aspect to the segundo story of cinderela II: Dreams Come True. I hope that you will all enjoy this. I apologize for it being too long.*

It was a great sunny dia in Ponyville. Everyone was doing their usual business, whether it be doing work, talking to others, or just relaxing their dia away. As we get to the schoolhouse, we see the little colts and fillies come running out of the door. But why? Because school was out for the summer! Everyone there was very happy to leave so they could hang out with each other mais often....
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
In case you are wondering, ani is korean for no.

Three old blind stallions were walking alongside a rua to a club. They were all walking with canes making sure they weren't going to hit anything. They kept walking until they saw a pónei, pônei get in a red sports car. Yes, the stallions were old, but they weren't blind. As the pónei, pônei was getting in his sports car the stallions shot him. Then they got in a old hearse, and drove away. "One agent down two to go." the driver said. "Who are we killing next?" the laranja stallion asked. "Our seguinte target is a yellow Alicorn that lives right here." The driver...
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Stormy: That's enough Discord!!
Discord: nothing is enough for me!
Score: (picks up Nikki and takes her behind some bushes) I'm so sorry Nikki, *sniff* hang on there! (Goes back to fight)
Stormy: Your never gonna get away with this!
Discord: I already got away with this! BWAHAHAHAHA!!
Score: Well? What are you waiting for? Stab me if you can.
Discord: Very Well, (picks up Score) ready?
Score: Rea-
Stormy: WAIT!!!!
Score: Stormy?! What are you doing?!?
Stormy: Listen Discord, you are-
Discord: So powerful? So Handsome? So evil?
Stormy: uhhh..no
Discord: Then what am I?
Score: Don't listen to her! Stab me!...
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posted by savana89
"rain bow dash!!!"
"hu pinky? what is it?"
"your sister is back"
"WHAT BUT HOW!!!!"
"i dont know shes coming-(passes out on grond)
"hello dashy my little sister WHO PUT A CURS ON ME AND BAND ME WITH YOUR friends but i forgive you now"
"uh.....i missed you?"
"aw i missed you to do you need any help dashy"
"ya can you um(looks aroud) can you clear all the clouds for me?"
"oh yes dashy(flys away)"
"i need to tell that egg head"
LATER
"SPIKE,take a leter"
"ok"
"D-"
"ill do it"
"ok"
"dear princesses, my sister is back you must come save us befor it happens from rain bow"
"hmm that was sort"
"whatever"
"oh dear sister whats going on ARE YOU SENDING A LETTER TO THE PRINESSES!!!"
"no no not at all(spikes sends the leter) its a letter to my... docter"
"ok dashy ill be back!"
Back with the story......

Pixel: So what u- Ow!
Score: What happen?
Pixel: A stupid TW scratched me...
Score: *gasp* Are you okay?
Pixel: Yea....but it's bleeding..
Score: Don't worry, I know somepony who can help
Pixel: Really? Who?
Score: AZURA!!!
Azura: yes?
Score: Do you have any bandages?
Azura: yes, I do. Do you need some?
Score: Yep

After Azura put some bandages on Pixel, Score explained everything that was happening, and asked him if he wanted to join, he said he was. Later, Score introduced her friends to Pixel.

Brawny: Welcome to the herd brother
Pixel: *laughs*
Stormy: okay, now what?
Cotton Swirls:...
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor