EPISODE 5:

Pinkie Pie: Five hundred and sixty-six, five hundred and sixty-seven, five hundred and sixty-eight... Phew! Look at that, Pound Cake! I am so close to breaking my personal cupcake-icing record!

Mrs. Cake: My goodness! I can't believe what I'm seeing here!

Pinkie Pie: Pretty impressive if I do say so.

Saten: (hung over on the couch) (angrily) STOP WITH THE NOISES!

Pinkie: Hey.. Just cause we celebrated earlier doesn't mean you drink ALL the wine.

Mrs Cake: Uhh.. Anyway. would you mind watching the counter while I pop to the supply room? We've just received a very special order, and the ingredients need to be perfect.

Pinkie Pie: Okie-dokie-lokie.

Mrs Cake: Thanks, dear!

Pinkie: (ends up leitura letter addressed to the Cakes) A BABY!?..

Saten: NO SHOUTING!!!

Pinkie: (quieter) Shining Armor and Princess Cadance are having a baby?! [squeals] This is the best news ever! I can't wait to tell Twilight!

Saten: Who the hell is Cadence?

Mrs. Cake: Oh, em, Pinkie, uh... [whispers] it's a topo, início secret surprise.

Mrs. Cake and abóbora Cake: [prolonged shushing][door closes]

Pinkie Pie: A topo, início secret surprise?! That means I have to keep the exciting news... [gulps] ...to myself!

Saten: (annoyed) oh god here comes that damn song.

(the MLP theme song plays).

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Later that dia Pinkie is seen having lunch with Saten and Derpy. The three have been hanging out a lot lately.

Pinkie: Even though I didn't technically make a Pinkie Promise to Mrs. Cake, I can't tell Twilight or anypony the big news! That would make me a... a... a big old surprise ruiner! Right?

Saten: But you DID tell someone.. You told "us".

Derpy: Yeah.

Pinkie: ... Oh god, your right.. See, I CAN'T keep a secret.

Gummy: [sucking on pacifier]

Pinkie: Did you take that from Pound Cake again? Don't you know it's wrong to steal from a baby?

Rarity (happens bye): What's all this about a baby?

Pinkie: What? Who? What? Who said something about a baby?!

Rarity: You did, Ms. Pie, just now. What were you talking about?

Pinkie: Umm... [sucking on pacifier]..

Rarity: What are you doi-

Pinkie: NOTHING!.. I'm doing nothing.. (runs off).

Derpy: (sighs) I better go after her.. (flies off).

Rarity: (alone with Saten) Soo...

Saten: You have any asprine?

Rarity: Think so.. Follow me. (leads him to her house).

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MEANWHILE:

Pinkie: Oh Derpy.. I don't know if I could do this?

Derpy: Well.. You can always do what I do when I have a problem.. (shows bag of Marijuana).

SOON AFTER:

Pinkie and Derpy are both high.

Pinkie: W- What where we doing again?

Derpy: Say.. This reminds me. (long pause).

Pinkie: Reminds you of what?

Derpy: ... Dude.. I totally forget.

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LATER:

Inside Twilight's castle, Saten came in as he's part of the group now. Saved the main six mais than once.

Saten: Hey, I'm here.

Twilight: Great.. Have you happened to see Pinkie on your way here?

Saten: Last I saw her.. She was with my cousin.

Rarity: You mean Derpy?

Saten: Yeah, her.. I'm sure Pinkie will arrive so-

Pinkie: (comes in).

Saten: There she is.

Pinkie: (still under the effects of the Marijuana) Duuude.

Twilight: What's with your eyes.

Pinkie: (stoned) Fine.. I'm fine, (stoned laugh).

Pinkie: (stoned) Sorry, I had trouble working my key to the castle.

Rarity: Darling, that's a leaf.

Pinkie: (stoned) Yes. Leaves are great ... Say.. What if.. Our whole universe.. Was just another leaf on God's tree... Mind blown!

Dash: ... Your high.

Pinkie: On life?.. Yes I am!

Dash: No, on weed.. I know the signs. Shame Saten.

Saten: Hey, it was Derpy, I had nothing to do with it.

AJ: He's right.. Derpy is kind of a stoner.

FLASHBACK:

AJ: Derpy, I need you to watch over AppleBloom.

Derpy: Sure.

(not long after).

AJ: oi Derpy I just thought I'd check on y- What the hell?

Derpy: (stoned and in fetal position, AppleBloom lookng at her weirdly) Gov'ment came & took my baby!

END FLASHBACK:

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LATER:

Everyone gathered around the table, Pinkie is no longer under the drug effects, so everything is normal.

Twilight: Great! Everypony's here. Now I don't have to wait any longer to tell you all the wonderful news! Somebody special is coming to visit Ponyville, and I need your help getting everything ready!

[main cast chattering, except Saten who's looking bored].

Twilight: It's...

Pinkie and Twilight both: Shining Armor and Princess Cadance!

Twilight: ... Yes, and they're coming—

Pinkie: Tomorrow!

Twilight: ... Yes, on the-

Pinkie: Friendship Express rather than the Crystal Empire train so as not to cause too much of a scene when they skip town to come visit? [squee]

Twilight: Uhh.. Yes.

Pinkie: Annnnnd?

Twilight: And, that's it.

Pinkie: Oh.

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: Uh, how did you know all that?

Pinkie: [nervous laugh] Uh... Pinkie Sense?

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: So, you said you needed our help with something?

Twilight: Follow me.

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arco iris, arco-íris Dash: Sweet posters! Is that Smash Fortune?

Twilight Sparkle: It sure is! When Shining Armor said he wanted to come to the castelo and visit, I started collecting things he liked when he was a potro, colt as a surprise!

Pinkie: Surprise?! [nervous laugh]

Twilight: I've been so excited that it's been hard to keep it to myself!

Pinkie: [slightly muffled] I have no idea what that's like!

Fluttershy: Aww, look at the cute little ant farm!

Spike: And check out all these old comic books!

Twilight: Be careful! They're mint-in-bag!

Spike: [accidently blows it on fire] [nervous whistling]

Saten: What's this?

Twilight: This is Brutus Force. Shining Armor used to carry him around like his baby!

Pinkie: Yeah! [nervous laugh] Really cute! [nervous laugh]

Rarity: It is a bit juvenile for castelo décor, but it is very sweet of you.

Fluttershy: I'm sure Shining Armor will amor it.

Twilight: Me, too. But there's a few mais things I'd like to add before he gets here, and I could really use a hoof collecting them. Applejack: Whatever you need, sugarcube, we'll help you get it.

Rest of main cast sans Twilight: [various agreements]

Twilight: Thanks, everybody! I just can't wait 'til they walk in and see everything!

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: Totally understandable. Watching sombody else be surprised with something is almost better than being the one who's getting the surprise!

Pinkie: But... eh... what if the surprise is something so incredibly exciting that a pónei, pônei can't keep it in any longer, and she has to tell the pónei, pônei standing seguinte to her what it is or she might explode?!

Fluttershy: I would say... no.

Rarity: The pónei, pônei who ruins a surprise for somepony else has to live with that guilt forever!

Pinkie: [nervous laugh] Gotta bounce! [pinball noises] [crash]

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: So, I know the bar is set pretty high, but does anybody else think Pinkie Pie was atuação weirder than usual?

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Twilight: Those look yummy, Pinkie! Let me help you! But we better cover them up so they don't get spoiled.

Pinkie: Why would they get spoiled? We're all gonna eat them super soon!

Saten: Oh, didn't anybody tell you? Shining Armor and Cadance are held up. They may not arrive 'til Saturday.

Pinkie: Whaaaaaaaaaat?! [hyperventilating] You mean... [breathes] I have... [breathes] to wait... [breathes] another whole day?! I don't know if I can!

Twilight: Pinkie Pie, do you have something you need to say? You seem like you've been keeping something in.

Pinkie: [inarticulate yell]

Fluttershy: We're here to listen.

Applejack: Well, go on then, sugarcube.

Rarity: We're not going to judge you, darling.

Spike: You'll feel so much better once you get it off your chest!

Pinkie Pie: [blowing up balloon]

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: Come on. [balloon pops]

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: Whatever it is, you can tell us! We're best friends!

Pinkie: Okay, okay, you win! [inhales] Shining Armor and Cadance are gonna have a—

Shining Armor: An awesome weekend with the best little sister in all of Equestria!

Cadance: [giggles] Hi, every pony..

Pinkie Pie: [exhales]

Cadence: (to Saten) What's your name?

Saten: Saten Twist.

Cadence: Hi.

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Twilight: Shining Armor, Cadance! You're early! I thought something had come up and you weren't gonna make it until Saturday?

Cadance: So did we. Turned out we weren't needed in Maretonia until seguinte week. And the summit we were supposed to attend today had to be rescheduled, so... we got here even sooner than planned!

Shining Armor: Surprise!

Cadance: It's wonderful to see you all again!

Fluttershy, arco iris, arco-íris Dash and Rarity: [chattering]

Applejack: Well, the pleasure's all ours, Princess.

Twilight: I'm so glad you're here! I have a big surprise for you!

Shining Armor: Oh, yeah?

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Later:

Saten: (runs up to Cadence when she's por herself) Hello again.

Cadence: Oh.. Hi

Saten: Say.. If our relationships ever fail here's something to think about. (gives her a small piece of paper).

Cadence: T.. This is just a phone number.

Saten: Yeah.. MY phone number.

Cadence: (uncomfortable) Oh.

Saten: Yeah.

Cadence: I'm.. I'm a little creeped out.

Saen: Good, I'm in your head, gooood.

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Shining Armor: [hushed] Lucky we came when we did, huh? I'm guessing you saw the scroll we sent to Mr. and Mrs. Cake?.. (Pinkie smiles and blushes). Hey, I'm impressed you've been able to keep our secret this long!

Pinkie: So you're gonna tell Twilight now?!

Shining Armor: [hushed] You're gonna have to wait just a little bit longer. We have something special planned.. Why you think we had Ditto send it to the cakes.. It took some convincing though.

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FLASHBACK:

Shining: Boss, can you send this letter to the cakes instead of Twilight.

Ditto: I don't send letters, that's YOUR job.

Shining: I can't let her see me wait yet.

Ditto: Fine, whatever.. (takes the letter).

Shining: Your probably wondering why.

Ditto: Actually. I'm wondering why your not WORKING wait now.. I don't pay you to stand around.

Shining: Well.. Me and Cadence are having baby.

Ditto: That's great, but please get to work-

Shining: And we don't want Twilight knowing.

Ditto: I DON'T CARE WAIT NOW!

Shining: She will still find out.. But not yet

Ditto: This is why I never promote you.

Shining: But we plan on giving Twilight a surprise party over it.

Ditto: Are you even listening to me?

Shining: Glad you understand Commander.. Have a good trip.

Ditto: (groans)

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Shining: It'll be worth it, I promise.

Pinkie: (under breath) It'd better be.

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LATER:

Everyone is seen eating lunch. Pinkie and Saten are seen at the same table, Saten eating burger, Pinkie eating a sandwich/

Saten: Can you get the pepper, please?

Pinkie: I don't know how much longer I can last.. I am gonna explode if I don't tell somebody.

Saten: It'll be fine. Now please pass the pepper!

Pinkie: Hang on. I don't feel like you're taking this dilemma seriously.

Saten: Fine sweetie. You have my undivided attention.

Pinkie: Okay, now, the Shining said I still can't tell anyone the surprise.

Saten: (sarcastically) No way!

Pinkie: Yeah, well, it's true. But I am killing myself over here!

Saten: (sarcastically) Well, we wouldn't want that!

Pinkie: No, see? Well, you absolutely would not. And furthermore, this is getting harder than ever before!

Saten: (sarcastically) You're kidding!

Pinkie: No, I am not.

Saten: (sarcastically) This is a nightmare. How will you ever make a decision?

Sheldon You see? I don't know. What should I do?

Saten: (angrily pounding table) PLEASE! PASS! THE PEPPER!

Pinkie: (passes it nervously).

Saten: Finally.. (takes the pepper and puts on his burger before he starts eating it).

SOON AFTER:

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: Where did Shining Armor and Cadance say they'd meet us?

Twilight: In the town square. I wish they'd waited to walk over with us, but they said they had something to take care of first!

Pinkie Pie: [through gritted teeth] They're gonna have a lot mais to take care of soon...

Twilight: What?

Pinkie: Nothiiiiiiing!

Twilight Sparkle: What's this? [gasps]

Rarity: What does it say?

Twilight: A scavenger hunt! Shining Armor used to set these up for me when I was a filly! At the end, there was always a big prize, like a new book, or several new books, or—

Pinkie: (uncharacteristically angry) We get the picture! You like books!

Applejack: So what's the first clue?

Pinkie: [reading quickly] "You've got a scroll, you're on a roll, why don't you take a peek where young ones spend their week? A piece of paper will continue this caper."

Twilight: I've got it! "Where the young ones spend their week."

Applejack: I'm not quite followin'.

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Twilight: It's the Ponyville Schoolhouse!

Pinkie: Good enough for me! Now where's the seguinte clue? [panting like a dog] [sniffing] [sneezes]

Featherweight: Extra, extra! Get your Ponyville news! Read it in the paper! Extra, extra! [continues repeating under]

Twilight: "A piece of paper will continue this caper." [gasps] It's in the potro Free Press!

Rarity: Ooh, look at that dress Mayor Mare is wearing in the social report! Why, it's stunning!

Saten: Uh, didn't you make that, Rarity?

Rarity: Yes, what is your point?

Pinkie: Focus, everybody!

Twilight: You know, there's really no time on these scavenger hunts, Pinkie.

Pinkie: Aha! There! [tapping paper]

Twilight: [reading] "Though this hall is rather small, in it you'll find files of all kinds. Take a look on the back of the birth certificate of Applejack."

Twilight: Does anybody know where the birth certificates are kept?

Pinkie: Ooh! I do, I do! Go down that hall, then you take a left, then a right, then another right, then a slight left, and it's the third door from the right!

Fluttershy: Wow, Pinkie. I never knew you knew so much about town hall.

Pinkie: There's a lot of things I know! That you don't know I know!

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Fluttershy: Oh, you're so cute.

Fluttershy and Twilight: [giggling]

Twilight: [reading] "This seguinte place is where you can buy a mesa, tabela or chair, or some comfy beds to rest little heads"? [zip] [beat]

Pinkie: Ugh, really? None of you? [groan] It's obviously the furniture store! Go in, go in, go in!

Twilight: I don't know...

Pinkie: Daagh, fine! [rumbling and commotion] [crash]

Rainbow: Wow, you're scary good at this, Pinkie Pie.

Pinkie: [reading quickly] "It seems we've saved the best for last. We hope that you have had a blast. Now it's time to take a break where you can get a slice of cake!"

Main cast sans Pinkie Pie: Sugarcube Corner!

Pinkie: [scoffs] That was an easy one.

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Shining Armor: Surprise! Twily, did you like the scavenger hunt?

Twilight: It was perfect! Just like old times, except even better because this time I got to share it with my best friends! There's just one thing missing, isn't there?

Shining Armor: What's that?

Twilight: Mmmm, the book prize at the end!

Shining Armor: [laughs] There's still a prize, but it's a little different this time.

Twilight: Oh. I don't understand.

Pinkie: [giggles quietly]

Cadance: All the places we sent you today had something in common.

Twilight: Hmmm... First we went to the schoolhouse...

Pinkie: [trembling]

Twilight: And then we read the potro Free Press... After that we found Applejack's birth certificate... And then the last clue was under a crib.

Pound and abóbora Cake: [giggling]

Twilight Sparkle: Hmmm... School... foal... birth certificate... and crib... [gasps] Can it be? Are you two...?!

Cadance and Shining Armor: We're having a baby!

Pinkie: A baby, Twilight! It's a baby! Woo-hoo!

Twilight: You mean... I'm going to be an aunt?! This is the best prize ever!

Cadance and Shining Armor: [laughing]

Twilight: Oh, I amor you guys! And I can't wait to meet your little foal!

Shining Armor: Neither can we. [chattering]

Pinkie: I did it, I did it, I did it, I did it! [squee] [pop] Go, Pinkie. [chattering]

Cadance: [giggles] You did it, Pinkie Pie! You kept it a surprise! Thank you! Was it much trouble?

Pinkie: Piece of cake! [squee].

LATER:

While they were partying their was a knock on the door, and Dash opened it.

Dash: (gasps) Ditto!.. (hugs him).

Ditto: Hey.. Looking for Shining.

Shining Armor: Hey.. Come to cadastrar-se the party?

Ditto: Not wait this minute.. You could of told me you were gonna be away, I looked everywhere for you.

Cadence: We left you a note.

Ditto: You did?

Cadence: Yeah.. Told Spike to send it.

Spike: (sneaks away nervously).

Twi: You sure you can't stay for the party Ditto?

Ditto: I'm not really in the mood.

Cadence: How?.. I actually got Luna to accept being your girlfriend.

Ditto: I did.. Said we're both still kinda outcasts.. But she's keeping busy so really tired.

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EPISODE 6:

Saten and Spike: Starlight Glimmer?

Twilight: I was sure I saw her, boys. But when I looked again, she was gone! I'm just worried what she could be up

Spike: Nothing good, I bet. I heard she wasn't very happy the last time you saw.

Saten: (sarcastically) You don't say.

Twilight: Look, forcing everybody in her village to have the same cutie mark wasn't right. We had to do something!

Saten: I have faith she'll redeem.

Twilight: (annoyed) No you didn't.. You just thought she was hot.

Saten: ... Still do. But that's not the only reason.

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Twilight: Maybe I was just mais stressed about that speech than I thought.

Spike: Yeah. That sounds better than Starlight Glimmer coming back with an evil plot for revenge.

Twilight: Well, when you say it like that, it does sound kinda silly.

Spike: (sudden fear), Or it's totally true!

Starlight: (dramatically sitting in Fluttershy's seat) Welcome home, Twilight!

Saten (eexcitedly): oi Starligh-

You ruined my town Twilight!.. In fact. I was waiting for you!

Twilight: Waiting for m-.. What are you talking about, Starlight!?

Starlight: [laughs] I'd tell you, but I don't want to ruin the surprise!

Saten: Ooo I like serprises where is i-

Starlight: SHUT UP SATEN!.. You ALSO ruined my town!... In fact.. I am glad your here. (her horn begins to glow) Your LOVE, this!.. (sucks Twilight, Spike and Saten all though a portal).

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Saten: Cloudsdale? Starlight doesn't even have wings! Why would she come here?

Twi: I don't know Twist, Spike, but it looked like she could fly with just magic! Keep your eyes open. We don't know what she has planned.

[whoosh]

Spike: Isn't that arco iris, arco-íris Dash?

Twi: Did arco iris, arco-íris Dash look really young to you? And I didn't see a cutie mark. You don't thin-.. Saten put her down!

Saten: (hugging filly arco iris, arco-íris Dash) She's adorable!

Filly Dash: I NEED AN ADULT!

Saten: I AM an adult.

Twi: (pulls Filly Dash away, and lets her fly off frightenedly) We don't have time for this.

Saten: (groans) Whatever.

Spike: Uh, anyway... Seems we traveled back in time to when arco iris, arco-íris Dash raced the bullies who made fun of Fluttershy and performed her first sonic rainboom.

Twi: But only estrela Swirl the Bearded could do something like that, and even his spell just went back a week! How could Starlight do mais than the greatest wizard in Equestria?

[paper rustling]

Spike: With this.

Twi: (gasps) estrela Swirl's spell! Oh, no!

Spike: Come on, let's go!

Twi: Go where?

Spike: To watch the race. I don't wanna miss the rainboom! Whoa!

Twi: (sighs) Come on Saten, we better follow him.

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Starlight Glimmer: (appears during race, and stops Dash, ruining the coarse of time).. Huh... That was surprisingly easy, I still have time for my to do list.

TO DO LIST: 4PM to 7PM, write hate letters to Nicole Arbour.

Twi: (appears, with clear anger on her face) What did you do?!

Starlight: (chuckles) Your about to find out, darling.

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Spike: Uh, Twilight? Where's your castle?

Twilight: The map pulled us back, but whatever Starlight did in the past changed things here!

Spike: But why? And how did we get here? Where's here?

Twilight: mais like when.

Saten: (annoyed) Please Twilight, that's such a douche time-traveler thing to say.

Twilight: Whatever.. Point is, Starlight altered estrela Swirl's spell, then somehow used it on the map to travel into the past and change something!

Saten: It's obvious what it i-

Twilight: Saten, please.. Anyway. Once she did, the map pulled us back to the present!

Spike: So we're back where— I mean, when we started?

(Saten is heard groaning)

Twilight: Not exactly. Everything's different. Look. The map doesn't even make sense anymore! The Crystal Empire takes up half of Equestria!

Spike: Plus there's the whole missing castelo thing.

Twilight: Right! This is too big to handle on our own.

Spike: You think?

Twilight: We need to find our friends and get help!

Spike: I'm gettin' a bad feeling about this, Twilight.

Twilight: I know, Spike, but this is Ponyville. How bad could things be?

Spike: Is that Sugarcube Corner?

Twilight: I don't understand.

Spike: [gasps] (runs to Rarity's house, knocking on her door) RARITY!?

Twilight: I don't think she's here, Spike. I'm not sure anything we know is the same. But I know one place that could never change!

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SKIPS TO APPLEJACK'S FARM:

Twilight: Applejack?!

Applejack: What can I do for you?

Twilight: It's so good to see you! We couldn't find Pinkie or Rarity or Fluttershy or arco iris, arco-íris Dash, but I just knew you'd still be here!

Applejack: Of course I am. This is my home. But who in tarnation is Pinkie Bow and Flutterdash? Or you for that matter?

Twilight: You... don't know who I am?

Saten: Coarse she dosen't dummy.. Starlight changed it so you don't know each other.

Twilight: Oh, right.

Applejack: Honestly, the only name I recognize is Rarity, but she left for Manehattan years ago.

Spike: (excited) Probably to become a world-famous fashion designer, I bet.

Applejack: Not that I know of. Last I heard, she went to help with the cause like everypony else.

Twilight: The cause?

Applejack: The war against King Sombra and the Crystal Empire?

Twilight, Saten and Spike: What?!

Applejack: Where have you three been?

Spike: Actually, it's whe-

Saten: (angrily) Don't say it!

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Applejack: Well, I'll admit. I've lived in these parts my whole life and I've never seen this before.

Spike: There's also supposed to be a castelo that goes with it.

Applejack: But I still don't see what this has to do with you and I bein' friends.

Twilight: Another pónei, pônei named Starlight Glimmer used this map to travel through time and change things in the past. For some reason, the map's here but everything else is different!

Applejack: Different how?

Saten: Well, for one thing, where we come from, there's no war with King Sombra.

Twilight: Yeah.. Maybe you could tell us how the war started, then we can figure out when everything changed!

Applejack: That's easy enough. [sighs] When the Crystal Empire returned, it brought King Sombra back with it.. And it didn't take long for him to force every one of his subjects to fight for him against Equestria.. And even with Princess Celestia leadin' the charge, it still takes every last pónei, pônei in Equestria doin' their part, workin' dia and night, to keep up the fight.. First place to go was Fillydefia.

Saten: WHAT!?

Twilight: I just can't believe it! We stopped King Sombra! You and me and all of our friends!

Applejack: But we aren't friends.

Twilight: Wel-

Saten: Forget that Twilight!.. There's mais important questions.

AppleJack: Like?

Saten: (shaking AppleJack) WAS DERPY STILL IN FILLYDEFIA!?

AppleJack: Who's Derpy?

Saten: (enraged) THAT WASN'T THE QUESTION!

Twilight: Saten calm dow-

Saten: DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!.. DERPY MAY BE DEAD!

Twilight: (hugs him) Saten, it's okay, we're going to set things right.

Applejack: [sighs] I hope you do.

Saten: Yeah.. If you don't.. Well.. You won't exactly be so pretty anymore.

Twilight: ... You think I'm pretty?

Saten: Well.. (looks away) that wasn't the point.

Twilight: (giggles)

Spike: So... how are we gonna set things right?

Twilight: I don't know! The only thing we know for sure is that Starlight stopped the rainboom.

Spike: And that the map's still here.

Twilight: [gasps] Spike, that's it! The map is connected to the árvore of Harmony! It must sense that something isn't right! That's why it's still here! I'll just use Starlight's version of the spell and go back a little earlier and stop her before she even knows we're there!

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Fluttershy: All servants of queen Chrysalis found in these woods must be... destroyed!

Twilight: Wait! We're not changelings! Me and Saten are ponies! (points at Spike) And he's a dragon!

Pinkie: A likely story! Do something dragonish!

Spike: [belches]

Pinkie: [wheezes] That works..

Fluttershy: The servants of Chrysalis will do ANYTHING to save their evil skins!

Zecora: Stop! If they are changelings we'll soon see. Though I think they're not what they appear to be.

Saten: (groans) Oh god, not HER again.

Twilight: (shushes him)

Saten: (groans annoyedly)

Twilight: Zecora! Please, you have to listen.

Zecora: (ignores her) Beneath this salve, no changeling hides, for it reveals the truth inside.

Pinkie: What does it mean?

Zecora: The meaning is far worse, I see, for it is we who should not be.

Twilight: I think I can explain.

Zecora: I'm sure you can, but let's not talk here. Chrysalis and her army will soon draw near!

Saten: You mean that giant bug lady, who was strangely kinda hot?

Twilight: Is that any girl that you DON'T find hot!?

Saten: ... Granny Smith, maybe

Zecora: Uhhh, anyway.. The changelings took over not long ago. Though I'll wager in your world that isn't so.

Twilight: Chrysalis and her army tried to take over Canterlot, but my friends and I stopped her.

Zecora: Those friends as you know them are not here.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: The changelings attacked Ponyville! We barely escaped with our lives!

Zecora: The only changeling attack I see is the one that come here looking for me!

Applejack: (dramatically approaches) It's taken quite a while to find you, Zecora. [laughs and reveals to not be REAL AppleJck, but instead the Queen].

queen Chrysalis: [laughs] What a lovely village you've chosen to stage your little resistance. It looks absolutely delicious! [slurps]

Saten: You say the WEIRDEST things..

Chrysalis: Oh, come now, Zecora. You're vastly outnumbered.[changeling wings humming, Dash and Rarity turn into changelings, sense they also are just disguises].

Saten: I kinda like this.. We can so them a large light, and then the war would be over.

Pinkie: We already tried that, their smarter then that sadly.

queen Chrysalis: I know you don't want your charges hurt. Come quietly to the dungeons of Canterlot and I promise to leave the others

Pinkie: Why would she ever trust you?!

Twilight: Even if there's a chance Chrysalis will honor her word, shouldn't you try?

Zecora: [hushed] Race to the map while we hold off their attack. Stop Starlight and put the whole world back on track!

queen Chrysalis: Time to make a decision, Zecora!

Zecora: Even if what you are saying were true, we'd never surrender to a creature like you! (the battle begins as Saten Twilight and Spike run to the portal).

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Twilight: I don't know what happened that led you to make your village without cutie marks, and I'm sorry my friends and I had to take it away.

Starlight: (angrily) You want to know what happened to me?! I'll show you!

SOON AFTER:

Starlight: Because of his cutie mark! He got his, and I didn't! He moved on, and I didn't! I stayed here and never made another friend because I was too afraid another cutie mark would take them away, too!

Twilight: That's ridiculous. A cutie mark can't take your friends away.

Starlight: Not everybody's lucky enough to get her cutie mark at the same time as her friends!

Saten: Well.. Maybe she doesn't understand, but I do.

Twilight: Saten, plea-

Saten: (shushes Twilight, and approaches the tearful Starlight, who's cuddled in a cute little ball).. My cutie mark was an accident. I never wanted it.

Starlight: Yes.. I suppose I do remember you telling me that.

Twilight: Say what?

Saten: We became friends at one point.

Twilight: Oh.

Starlight: I thought Sunburst and I were the same. But we turned out different, and it tore our friendship apart!

Saten: Could be worse. Look at my início life.

Starlight: I.. Guess.

Twilight: And besides.. Just Make new friends! And if something that you can't control happens that changes things, work through it together! That's what friendship is! And it's not just my friendships that are important to Equestria! Everybody's are! When yours ended, it led us here. But just imagine all the others that are out there waiting for you if you just give them a chance!

Starlight: But how?

Twilight: Well Saten certainly seems to care about you, start there.

Starlight: True (stands up and hugs Saten).

Saten: (tries not to blush from the affection, proving he still has that crush on her).

Twilight: (giggles at this) Let's get back.

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EPISODE 7:

Starlight Glimmer, newly accepted student to Princess Twilight Sparkle, tries finding her way around the large castelo of Friendship. Upon finding Twilight in the castelo library, Starlight thanks Twilight for letting her stay at the castelo after everything she's done in the past. Twilight tries to help Starlight feel welcome, and as Starlight's teacher, she tries to figure out what her first friendship lessonshould be, having made extensive lists of possibilities.

Starlight: Right. Uh.. Is Saten here?

Twilight: He said he's on his way.. First he said he and Derpy had to do something.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

MEANWHILE:

Derpy: I.. I don't know about this Saten.. This place is giving me the creeps.

Saten: Relax, it'll be fine.. (knocks on the door to a old, rusty looking, trailer).

Trevor Phillips: (opens his door) Hello?

Saten: (holds contact) Hi, do you mind signing this contact to legalize wee-

Trevor: (suddenly punches Saten square in the nose, knocking him off the steps and onto the ground) I make a SHIT load of money selling that stuff! Last thing I can handle is legalism, NOW FUCK OFF!

Saten: (holding his nose as Derpy helps him up) You could of just said no!

Trevor: What's the fun in that?

Saten: Your a dick.

Trevor: WHAT!?.. (pulls out gun) SAY THAT AGAI- (Suddenly there's an explosion from inside the trailer).

Trevor: DAMN IT MICHAEL! I TOLD YOU NOT TO SMOKE IN HERE!

Michael: (off view) Eh, shut up!

Saten: Who's your friend?

Trevor: Why are you still here!? FUCK OFF!

Saten: (angrily) You fuck off.

Derpy: (nervously grabs leaves) Cousin, the guy has a gun.

Saten: Yeah, well I bet it's not real (gets nearly shot) LEAVING! (he and Derpy run off).

Trevor: (sighs and goes back inside his house) Stupid pónei, pônei references.. I hate this fuckin writer!

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Derpy: Well... That was scary.

Saten: Yeah.. But we still need a lift.. Lets ask her.

Carly Jade: (walking by) Who me?

Saten: Yeah.. Mind giving us a lift to the air port?

Carly: Sure kid, just let me put my "lawn trimmings" in the trunk.. (puts a suspicious looking body bag into the tronco, porta-malas of her car).

Derpy: Saten.. I -I think that was a body.

Saten: Yeah, I thought so two, but than she said it was lawn trimmings, gotta learn to listen Derpy.

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THE seguinte DAY:

CRYSYAL EMPIRE:

Saten: Me?

Twilight: Yes.. Starlight really seems to like you, so you can be the one to help Starlight find her old friend, Sunburst.

Saten: ... Can I bring Derpy?

Twilight: (giggles) of coarse you can.. But Spike is going two, I don't have any jobs for him.

Saten: Fine, fine.

Twilight: Then it's settled! Shining Armor and I will head straight to the castle, and you two can head straight to Sunburst's!

Spike: Aye-aye, Princess!

Starlight: [nervously] Uh-huh.

Twilight: (to Shining) Alright, big brother, let's go see this amazing baby pony!

Shining Armor: [snoring] Ahhh... the baby...

Saten: It's too bad that Carly girl didn't come.

Derby: She seemed kinda messed up in the head.

Saten: So?

Derby: We already have someone for that role.

FLASHBACK:

Master Sword: oi Derpy, happy birthday.. Here's your present.

Derpy: Is that a head!?

Master Sword: (holding dead pónei, pônei head) Yep, he shouldn't of touched my stuff!

END FLASHBACK:

Starlight: Are you sure guys sure about this..

Saten: oi we're here for you.

Spike: Me tw-

Saten: (angrily) SHUT UP SPIKE!.. (calmly to Starlight) See, we're all friends here.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Derpy: (sees large statue of Spike) Is that Spike?

Spike: Oh, yep, it sure is!.. Now according to the ma-

Saten: Starlight: (purposely distracting him) Why is there a statue of you in the Crystal Empire?

Crystal pónei, pônei 1: Because Spike the Valente and Glorious saved all of us from King Sombra!

Crystal pónei, pônei 2: And then again during the Equestria Games!

Saten and Derpy: Shouldn't we keep mov-

Starlight: Really?

Crystal pónei, pônei 3: Really! [to Spike] Big fan.

Starlight: Um, when were you going to tell me about this?

Spike: Nah, it's no big deal.

Crystal Ponies: It most certainly is!

Starlight: That's it! We're not going anywhere until I get the whole story! (uses her magic to put Spike in a chair).

Spike: (in head) I think I'd rather die.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Shining Armor: Before we go in, I should probably tell you. Seeing the baby might be a bit of a shock.

Twilight: Come on, big brother. I've met bebês before. I expect meeting this one won't be any different.

Flurry Heart: (reveals to be an baby ailcorn, witch shocks the main six).

Twilight Sparkle: Of course, I could be wrong.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Twilight: (shocked) The baby is an alicorn!?

Ditto: (there with Luna, cause there actually a couple now) Seems that way.

Rarity: But... But... But I thought Alicorn wings had to be earned por accomplishing some great, princess-worthy deed!?

Applejack: Yeah. How can you just be born with 'em?

Celestia: The birth of an Alicorn is something Equestria has never seen!

Luna: Yes, it is beyond even our understanding.

Fluttershy: [hushed] That's not very reassuring.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Pinkie Pie: (typical Pinkie Pie excitement) Wow! A unicorn, and a Pegasus! So she could be a super-strong flyer and have crazy baby magic!

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: Well, I know all about super-strong flying!

Twilight: (sudden joy) And I can help keep tabs on her magic!

Flurry Heart: [sneezes, witch causes her to blow a hole though the roof]

Celestia: (nervous) It appears her magic is mais powerful than that of a newborn unicorn!

Ditto: (looks outside) Yes, but crowds have already started to gather.

Pinkie Pie: [inhales randomly appeared balloon] This Crystalling is gonna be some party! [balloon pops]

Cadance: Do you think we should call it off?

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: Um, we've all faced a lot worse than baby magic.

Rarity: I can't imagine cancelling such a beautiful and important ceremony over something so potentially adorable!

Applejack, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie and arco iris, arco-íris Dash: [general agreement]

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Celestia: ... In light of the little one's abilities, this Crystalling might be mais important than ever. [to Cadance] Perhaps you should address your subjects and remind them of that.

Princess Cadance: Yes ma'am (kisses Flurry coração before she leaves).

Shining Armor: [snoring]

Ditto: Shining Armor! Do you have everything you need for the ceremony?

Shining Armor: [tired] Huh?... Oh, no! I still have to interview the honor guards, choose the purity crystal, and pick a crystaller!

Twilight: Alright, take it easy. Pinkie can stay here with me and keep an eye on the

Applejack: And we'll all help you with everythin' Armor: [snores] ...baby...

Rarity: That is, if you can stay awake long enough to tell us how?

Ditto: Well, you better hurry.

Rarity: (giggles) Yes sir.

Ditto: (to Luna) Come on dear, we should check probably help Cadence.

Luna: Good idea.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

meanwhile inside Sunburst's house, Starlight and Sunburst continue atuação awkward around each other, being intentionally vague and exaggerating about what they've been doing since parting ways. Spike looks through Twilight's list in procurar of a solution.

Derpy: (in the other room, trying to light joint without anyone knowing).

Spike: oi Derpy.

Derpy: (hides the joint) NOTHING!

Spike: What?

Derpy: Nothing, I was doing nothing.

SPright: Riight.. You have any ideas about estrela and Sun.

Derpy: I think shippers are gonna go CRAZY!

Spike: I'm serious.

Derpy: So am I.. Saten and Trixie are gonna be jealous that shippers don't know about them.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Princess Cadance: [tired, amplified] Dearest citizens, I am sure you are all just as thrilled and ready for this Crystalling as myself and Shining Armor. [crowd cheering]

Shining Armor: [panicked breathing] I'm not ready!

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: Take it easy! Just pick whoever looks the most like honor guard material.

Shining Armor: Right... right. (throws capacete over aleatório guard)

Royal guards: [whimpering]

Shining Armor: I'm sorry.. Fatherhood is way mais stressful than I ever thought.

Fluttershy: I can only imagine.

Rarity: Now, I know choosing the crystal of purity is a very important decision. So I have gone through the trouble of arranging them in order from incredibly pure to outrageously pure.

Fluttershy: Um, Rarity, don't they all sort of look the same?

Rarity: Oh, well, to the untrained eye, perhaps. What do you think, Shining Armor?

Shining Armor: [incoherent stammering] I don't know!

Rarity: [hushed] I hope Twilight and Pinkie are having better luck with the baby.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Twilight Sparkle: Pinkie, hold her still!

Pinkie Pie: I'm tryiiiiiiing!

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Saten (bangs in Maddy Twist) (confused): Mother!?.. I.. You.. How can?.. (shouts) WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!?

Maddy: Trixie Lulamoon was doing an performance at the town I was staying it.. She's certainly grown into an attractive young woman hasn't she?

Saten: Well... Yes, but what dose tha-

Maddy: I told Trixie that I wanted to apologize to you.. And I do.

Saten: Well... It might take some time.

Maddy: I understand.. But if you still have my number, call me if you change your mind ever.. (flies off cause she's pegasus).

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: (flies in soon after) oi Saten. Is it true there's another Dash in the place in that place you and Derpy went to?

Saten: Sure.. But.. Everyone down there is NUTS.. She'll probably be the same.

Dash: Oh.. Too bad.. I was gonna show her the wonder bolts.

Saten: What are the wonder bolts.

Dash: ... Wow.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

After Shining Armor finishes the Crystalling preparations and Cadance finishes addressing the public, Twilight and Pinkie Pie arrive with the baby to begin the ceremony. However, once the baby is separated from Pinkie, she starts to cry. Her booming wail causes the Crystal coração to shatter into pieces.

Applejack: I'm guessin' that's gonna make it harder to do the Crystalling.

Twilight: It's worse than that. Without the Heart, the Crystal Empire's about to be buried under a mountain of ice and snow!

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Saten: (checking on them) Are you friggin kidding me!?

Rarity: So... not only can we not take part in a fabulous ancient ceremony, but we're also about to be Frozen - Uma Aventura Congelante solid!

Ditto: Yes.. Apparently without the Crystal Heart's magical protection, the entire city's about to become a winter wasteland!

Applejack: But what about when King Sombra ruled the Crystal Empire and the Crystal coração was missin'? The city wasn't covered in snow then!

Twilight: The coração wasn't missing. It was still in the castle. King Sombra had just hidden it.

Celestia: I'm afraid Ditto and Twilight correct, the storm clouds are already forming. [lightning cracks].

arco iris, arco-íris Dash: I can totally fly up there and bust those puppies! No problem!

Celestia: I wouldn't advise it dearie.. Those storm clouds are not like the ones you know.

Luna: This far north, the weather has a will of its own, and now it will only grow stronger, enveloping everything in its path.

Cadance: Including the Crystal Empire!

Twilight: And us along with it!

Ditto: (sarcastically) Typical.

Spike There's gotta be somethin'...

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Sunburst: I know Princess Twilight is keen on the two of us rekindling our friendship, but... it's been so long. I don't see how anything on that list is going to help.

Starlight Glimmer: I know, right? It's not like there's some spell that would magically compel us to pick up where we left off.

Sunburst: Well, actually, there's several. Mist Mane's Material Amity, Rockhoof's Rapport, Flash Prance's Fellow... ship... [ahem] But I-I get the feeling the princess isn't looking for a spell.

Starlight Glimmer: [chuckle] Definitely not.

Spike: Got it! [reading] "And if all else fails, ask them to share an embarrassing moment from their past, maybe even something they regret!"

Derpy: Uh, I don't see how that would help.

Starlight Glimmer: Uh, yeah! We should just get out of your mane. It's pretty obvious this isn't going how Twilight hoped, and I'm sure you have plenty of important work to do...

Sunburst: What? Oh! Right, yes, heh-heh! Uh, no rest for the wizardly.

Derpy: No need.. Saten is there.. Told me he wanted to check on our friends.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

LATER THAT EVENING:

Ditto: So.. How's Scootaloo?

Dash: Oh, she's fine.. She got her cutie mark.

Ditto: I know. She mentioned it in her weekly letters, wish i could of been there.

Dash: Yeah, her parents said the same.. They might be visiting soon.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Twilight: That spell was the only thing we found in the whole biblioteca that was even close to what we needed!

Cadance: Do you think you can remember the spell?

Twilight Sparkle: I only read it through once!

Rarity: Well, if anybody can exactly remember something she read for the first time two minutos ago, it's you, Twilight.

Twilight: I'll try. But I'm not sure how long it'll take.

Saten: (looks outside) Is quickly an option?

Cadance: I'll help if I can, but we should evacuate the city just in case!.. Chief Ditto, you need to lead everybody to the train station before the tracks freeze over!

Ditto: I will. But between you and Twilight, I'm sure you'll remember the spell.

Twilight: I only hope this spell is the one we need.

Saten: Wait a minute.. Starlight's friend Sunburst.. He's a big important wizard or something.. We should bring him here. Maybe he'll know what to do if the spell fails.

Ditto: Well hurry!

Saten: Yes sir! (flies off).

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Ditto: (to crowd) Listen.. You all need to leave!

Mustache Crystal Pony: Did I mention this was a Royal Crystalling? When the crystaller holds the young one aloft, all of the Empire will share their joy and light, and the Crystal coração will beat stronger than it ever has befor-

Ditto: Yeah, yeah, I know how it goes. But you can't st-

Stubborn Pony: It really is a moving ceremony!

Ditto: I DON'T CAR-

Stubborn pónei, pônei 2: Maybe you changelings don't understand the the importance of this.

Ditto: Change... Look, EVERYONE makes mistakes!.. Can we just FORGET about that!

Stubborn pónei, pônei 2: Whatever.. Changeling.

Ditto: (growls angrily) YOU SHUT YO-

Shining: (holds Ditto back) Listen to me.. Cadence is evacuating the area! You don't have a choice.

The pony's STILL don't leave.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Saten: (bursts in) Starlight! We need your friend sunburst.

Sunburst: Why?

Saten: You haven't looked outside, have you?

Sunburst: (looks out the window) Snow? That's... not right. The Crystal Heart-

Saten: It's gone!.. The baby.. It's an Alicorn.

Sunburst: Really?

Starlight: Really! And her magic is a little berserk, and well, sounds like she broke the heart.

Saten: Yes.. But Twilight thinks she can fix it and I thought YOU could help!

Sunburst: Me?

Saten: Starlight says you're an important wizard in the Crystal Empire! It just makes sense!

Sunburst: Right... right... right right right. You know, I'd like to help, I-I really would. I-I just have so much, um, important wizard work to do around here.

Starlight Glimmer: Sunburst, I know you're busy, but did you hear what he said?

Sunburst: Oh, I heard him alright, but like I said, when you're an important wizard, the work just piles up.

Starlight Glimmer: But Sunburst!

Sunburst: [sighs] Look, Starlight, I want to help. I do. But I can't. I wish I could, bu-

Starlight Glimmer: What do you mean?!

Sunburst: Fixing an ancient relic? I-I can't even come close to doing something like that!

Saten: But I thought you were an important wizard!

Sunburst: Well, you were wrong, okay?! I'm not an important wizard! I'm not even a wizard at all!

Saten: Oh... Well your just big fuckin liar aren't yo-

Starlight: (light blocks his mouth and shushes him).

Sunburst: I know it's hard for you guys to understand, but not ALL of us end up achieving greatness.

Starlight Glimmer: What!? Why wouldn't I understand that?

Sunburst: You're the protégé of the Princess of Friendship! I don't think she picks just anybody for that!

Spike: Technically, she's mais of a student than a protégé.

Derpy: (punches Spike's elbow) That's not helping!

Sunburst: Whatever. I'm sorry I'm not the big important wizard you were expecting.

Starlight Glimmer: Sunburst, I don't care if you're a wizard or not. I'm just surprised. You always knew so much about magic. I mean, look at all these books!

Sunburst: Yeah, well, leitura about magic is one thing, but you don't know what it was like at magic school! To know so much and not be able to do any of it!

Starlight Glimmer: ... Well, you don't know what it was like to be left behind! And then getting so amargo, amarga that you steal the cutie marks from an entire village and then get defeated por Twilight and her friends, so you travel through time to get back at them, but they beat you again and teach you about friendship, but you're so terrified ponies will find out what you did that you can't make any FRIENDS!

(awkward pause).

Sunburst: Did you really travel through time?

Spike: See? I told you he'd be impressed.

Sunburst: I'm sorry we lost touch. Maybe if I had reached out, you could have helped me at magic school, and I could have helped you to...

Starlight Glimmer: Not become totally evil?.. [sighs] Let's just say I know what it's like to have something you're not exactly proud of.

Sunburst: When you showed up thinking I was some big wizard... I'm sorry. I should have told you the truth.

Starlight Glimmer: It's fine. At least we worked it all out. I think Twilight would be proud of us.

Spike: Well, if you ever want to tell her about it, we should probably leave now!

Saten: [gasps] I forgot to tell you! They're evacuating the city! You need to get to the train station, unless you've got a spell here that will drive back the Frozen - Uma Aventura Congelante North and fix the Crystal coração so the baby can have her Crystalling?

Sunburst: Crystalling...! Of course!

-------------------------------------------------------------------

EPISODE 8:

Glaze: Here's your stuff (hands over a bag of weed).

Saten: Thanks Mrs WoodenToaster, wanna smoke it with me?

Glaze: No thanks, I don't smoke that stuff anymore.. This isn't high school.

Saten: Maybe not to YOU.

Glaze: Whatever.. Usual price.. $280.

Saten: Sure, here (hands her the money).

Glaze: Thank yo-.. This is 2 dollars!

Saten: I'm a little low on cash, okay.

Glaze: Low on cash!?.. What, did you spend it all cerveja again?

Saten: No.. I realized.. If there's the risk of becoming my father.. It's probably time to stop drinking.

Glaze: Ahh... Some could say that dia came and went after you gave yourself that drunken haircut.. But still, long time coming.. But anyway.. I'm sorry, but you know how it goes.. No weed, till I get my money.

Saten: Oh come on.. Can't it just be free.. For old times sake.

Glaze: Old times?.. You haven't seen me for 9 years, and now I lost my cantar job cause off you appearing out of the blue.. I'm a little on edge Saten.

Saten: It's okay.. I'll just rob it out of somebody.. I'm a real professional at it.

aleatório pónei, pônei walks by.

Saten: (menicingly raises fist at the pony) GIVE ME YOUR MO-

Pony: AHHH (punches Saten, breaking his nose, before running off).

Saten; (screams in agony).

Glaze: (Sarcastically) Yes. your a REAL export.

Saten: Oh shut up.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

LATER THAT EVENING:

maçã, apple Bloom: Wow... Did we really only ever do things just to get our cutie marks?

Sweetie Belle: I don't know. Maybe?

Scootaloo: Aw, come on! We did lots of stuff that didn't have anything to do with getting a cutie mark.

Sweetie Belle: Of course we did!

maçã, apple Bloom: Absolutely!

(awkward silence).

Sweetie Belle: Huh. So now that we don't have to do stuff to get our cutie marks, what is it that the Cutie Mark Crusaders actually do?

maçã, apple Bloom: We do exactly what we got our cutie marks in! Cutie Mark Crusaders: Helping other ponies!

Scootaloo: Ponies without cutie marks!

Sweetie Belle: Or ponies who've forgotten their special purpose!

maçã, apple Bloom: Exactly... I think I know someone.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Saten: No.. Screw Cutie Marks!

AppleBloom: Oh come on, surely you'd like to know what your REAL talent could be?

Saten: No.. I hope I NEVER get my cutie mark!.. I'm glad Starlight roubou it.. It ruined my entire life.

Sweetie Belle: It was just the wrong mark.. Don't give up faith.

Saten: I can't lose faith, if I never HAD it to begin with.. Think of it that way kiddo.. Now, do anyone of you have $278 dollars?

Crusaders: No.

Saten: (annoyed) Damn it! Why is this so hard!.. (flies off).

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Sweetie Belle: But are you sure you feel content?

Big McIntosh: Eeyup.

Scootaloo: Not even a tinge of dissatisfaction?

Big McIntosh: Nnnope.


maçã, apple Bloom: Not even the slightest naggin' sensation that you don't really know what your purpose is in life or why you have a big maçã, apple as a cutie mark?

Big McIntosh: (annoyed] Nnnope.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

LATER THAT SAME EVENING:

maçã, apple Bloom: This is gonna be a lot harder than I thought.

Sweetie Belle: Who knew there were so few ponies worried about their cutie marks?

Scootaloo: Kinda makes you wonder why we made such a big deal out of it for so long. (they both glare at her) ... What?

maçã, apple Bloom: The point is, helpin' ponies with cutie mark problems is what makes us special.

Sweetie Belle: But if we can't find anypony with a problem... Even Saten, who dosen't even have one.

Scootaloo: ...Maybe we're not special.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Bulk Biceps: Yeah! I know exactly what you mean. You can't find a cutie mark problem. I have a cutie mark problem. It's so confusing, and I feel like the solution is staring me right in the muzzle.

Sweetie Belle: So... what's your cutie mark problem?

Bulk Biceps: My cutie mark is a dumbbell, but I've lifted every haltere in Ponyville!

Scootaloo: [nervously] Have you tried lifting other things?

Bulk Biceps: You mean, not dumbbells?

Sweetie Belle: Yeah!

Bulk Biceps: I hadn't thought of that. You guys are awesome! [crunch]

Bulk Biceps: But... what happens when I run out of other stuff?

Sweetie Belle: ...I guess you could teach other ponies to lift things?

maçã, apple Bloom: Yeah!

Bulk Biceps: Yeah! Wow, you three really have a knack for this! (leaves)

Sweetie Belle: ... That was easy!

maçã, apple Bloom: Maybe too easy.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

INSIDE A CONVENIENT STORE:

Crusaders: Are you sure your contend with your cutie mark?

Derpy: For the last time, yes.. Now if you don't mind, I promised Saten I'll get him the money he owes Glaze.. (puts on Dia das bruxas mask, and fires a small revolver into the air, hinting that this may not of been her first time ever doing this, cause she's very professional acting). NOBODY MOVE!.. (to cashier) OPEN THE CASH REGISTER!

Scootaloo: What the hell is wrong with Saten's family!?

AppleBloom: I wish I knew.

Derpy: COME ON! COME ON! I DON'T HAVE ALL FUCKING DAY!

The crusaders sneak out, Derpy flying out soon after, with the bag of money.

Derpy: (cutely) Bye girls.

Scootalooo: Well.. Guess it's back to the árvore house.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

Derpy: oi cousin.. I got the money.

Saten: Really, ho-.. You robbed another store didn't you?

Derpy: ... Maybe.

Saten: Derpy.. This isn't Fillydefia, you can't go around robbin-

Derpy: Maybe YOU can't.. But unlike you, I've been robbing sense I was a little girl, remember?

Saten: Yes, you and Glaze corrupted me.

Derpy: (laughs) Oh please.. When I found you. You were pathetic.. I made you tougher.

Saten: Yes.. But Derpy you also made me into a drunken pot head.

Derpy: Well, in our family (drinks Volka).

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FLASHBACK:

Filly Glaze (her and Trixie being his` ONLY friends of the time): I'm sorry about your mom putting you into adoption and all.

Filly Saten: Ahh, can't say I'm too serprised.. But at least I met my first cousin Derpy for the first time.

Filly Glaze: Oh yes, Derpy.. I owe her money actually.. (goes to bank, but it's closed) NO! NO! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?

Filly Saten: It's okay, we can just check back tomorrow.

Filly Glaze: ... (sighs) Guess your right.

Filly Saten starts heading back, but from behind him Glaze pick up a trash can and breaks the bank window, triggering the alarm, shocking Saten.

Filly Glaze: (calmly walks in)

Filly Saten: WHAT ARE YOU DOING, WE GOTTA GET OUT HERE!?

Filly Glaze: Relax.. Derpy and I do this all the time.. Average response time is nine minutes.. (approaches security camera, waving to it without even wearing a mask, before covering it with whip cream to block the screen).

Filly Saten: YOUR INSANE!

Filly Glaze: Yes I am, now help me with there safe.

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PRESENT TIME - SEVERAL DAYS LATER:

Saten: Here's your money.

Glaze: (takes the bag) Thank you old friend.. Do you know any available jobs?.. You owe me, Twist

Saten: Oh come on, I said I was sorry.

Glaze: Sometimes, sorry isn't enough.

Saten: Fair enough.. But funny how it goes.. As fillies you were the one always getting ME in trouble.

Glaze: True.. But after being arrested that one time, last year.. Guess I matured.

Saten: Hey, I got arrested all the time, it's no big deal.. But whatever.. (flirtingly) Your still hotter now.

Glaze: (blushes) Your sweet.

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maçã, apple Bloom: ... Who'd thought it'd be so hard to find somethin' for us all to do together?

Scootaloo: Well, I know this might sound crazy, but what if we didn't?

maçã, apple Bloom: Didn't what?

Scootaloo: Do things together. Well, do everything together.

maçã, apple Bloom: But we're the Cutie Mark Crusaders!

Scootaloo: And we always will be! But I really wanna bungee jump! The speed, the height, the fall!

Sweetie Belle: And I know you two aren't interested, but I wanna try : Isn't there something you've always wanted to do on your own?

maçã, apple Bloom: I don't know... I guess I figured we'd always do stuff together. But bungee jumping sounds just as scary as crochet sounds borin'.

Scootaloo: That's okay. Sweetie Belle and I can do the things we like, and you can do whatever you like!

Sweetie Belle: Just as soon as you figure out what it is.

maçã, apple Bloom: I guess...

Scootaloo: Great! Then we can meet back here and talk all about what we've done!

maçã, apple Bloom: But I don't know what it'll be.

Sweetie Belle: You'll find something!

Scootaloo: Something awesome!

maçã, apple Bloom: [sighs] Well... I guess now I have to.

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Derpy: Thanks for another date.

Master Sword: Yes.. And I'm here to make it night your never forget.. (shoots dead pónei, pônei for no apparent reason).

Derpy: ... Oh my.

Master Sword: (proudly) Yeah.. (puts the gun away, and moves on, as if nothing happened).