HAHA I love how you put the III in there, that's awesome :D

Um...okay favorite quote. I have so many it's hard to decide. I guess my favorite quote would be Dwight's perfect crime...

"What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier. It's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son, and he's the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadaro. She's been waiting for me all these years, she's never taken another lover. I don't care, I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier."

I'll post more later though.

I love that 2nd one. He also asked about Masturbation as well LOL. Dwight is epic.

I also like "learn your rules, you better learn your rules, if you don't you'll be eaten in your sleep..."

XD

That means you'll be something's dinner in your sleep if you do not learn your rules apparently...lol.

Oh, what about this one?

Dwight: I want to have a child for business reasons and I want you to be the mother. If you agree say nothing; if you disagree, say anything.
Angela: *completely quiet*
Dwight: Very well. Let's meet at 7:30 at our old meeting spot and bang it out. Later...
Angela: What if the kid is a girl?
Dwight: Irrelevant question, the contract states that the child shall be male.

I would be silent too. lol

Another is...

"Pam is constantly throwing up because of the pregnancy. If she eats something the fetus doesn't like she is screwed. It's amazing. A three ounce fetus is calling the shots. It's so bad ass."

LMAO
"Fact: You are drinking grape soda. You never drink grape soda.
Fact: You are talking to Jim. You never talk to Jim." and this

"When you become close to someone, you develop a kind of sixth sense. You can read their moods like a book.And now, the title of Michael's book is...'Something Weird is going On....colon...What Did Jan Say? The Michael Scott Story... by Michael Scott. With Dwight Schrute.'"

Oh I love this one too.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH­HH

Classic. XD Poor Dwight.

"In the wild, there is no healthcare. In the wild, healthcare is: 'Ow, I hurt my leg. A lion eats me; I'm dead.' Well, I'm not dead. I'm the lion. YOU'RE dead." xD

Lmao

"I can think like Michael. Alright, I'm deep below the ocean's surface in a submarine. A torpedo is coming right at me...No! Damn it! That's just my own imagination."

"I deserved that promotion, not Jim. It makes me want to put him in a triangle chokehold, and force him down to the ground and just keep pressing and pressing and then flip him over and put him in a hammerlock! And he's gasping! He's panicking. Every last breath! And the crowd is going crazy. And boom! I emerge victorious! Ah-ha! Eighteen thousand dollars and a chance at the title! Whewhaa!"

"Phyllis' Wedding" Dwight and Jim are walking into the church and it is so crowded it is annoying Dwight and he says to Jim "Who are all of these people? There are too many people on this earth... we need a new plague!"... that comment made me laugh for the rest of the episode because he is just so, well, Dwight!

I also love when he is talking to Michael's "second head" on his Halloween costume while trying to help him decide who to fire (second season). He is dressed as one of the Star Wars characters but can't remember which, and Michael is making his other head talk back to Dwight or something and Dwight who is looking freaky in his costume, leans over and yells at the fake head "Quiet You!" It's just the way he says it... I say it to my dog any time she barks :)