The walls are illuminated por one small candle. Xander lies on his back staring at the ceiling above him. The shadows of both him and his novel crazed companion Josh dance upon the walls. The room is silent for a moment until Xander sighs heavily and turns to his side.

    “What’s wrong, Xan?” Josh questions, only glancing away from his book for a dividido, dividir moment.

    “She knows, Josh,” Xander replied pointedly.

Josh groaned in annoyance and practically threw his book aside.

    “Look, you really need to elaborate on what you...

Me, Myself, and I

By Rita Skeeter

Exclusive interview with notorious Death Eater Bellatrix Lestrange

"Here I am, sitting in the private dungeon of the notorious Bellatrix Lestrange, most feared follower of the Dark Lord, and having a completely normal interview. Read on to see if there’s mais to Bellatrix than just madness and a nasty reputation!"

RS: Hello!

BL: *growls*

RS: Do you mind if I use a quick-quotes quill?

BL: What’s that?

*fingers wand handle threateningly*

RS: Oh, nothing, erm, moving on…Can I call you Bella?

BL: No.

RS: Can I see your Dark Mark?

BL: *glares threateningly* How DARE...

Hey! This is ginnyweaslefan!:)(Melody is my real name) and this is my character for the Death Eater RP. Check the artigo out and tell me if I need to be mais descriptive.

My name is Kiana(It's actually my real friend's name [but we call her Kiki] and she would NEVER be in Slytherin) Marie McMahon. I am 17 years old and I'm proud to call myself a Sytherin. I come from a noble pureblood family and am the daughter of Adam and Marie McMahon,who were also in Slytherin. Unfortanetly they passed away. They just got very sick one day. It happened when I was 11. I became a death eater at about the age...

Still Lenzetta’s POV:
    The seguinte evening was probably the worst since the night of my parents deaths. We held one of notorious meetings which involved of course locating Harry Potter and a little bit of plans to overthrow the ministry. Those topics were fine to speak of, I’ve given some noteworthy suggestions of my own that the Dark Lord seemed pleased with, but the ending of the meeting was what made me feel ill.
    “Ladies, gentlemen,” he said right as people were going to get up from their seats. “For those of you who do not know, we have...

Kidnap the Potter boy!
Make him come and fight!
Take away his wand,
And then torture him tonight!

You know that we all can’t wait
For the Potter boy to meet his fate
If he won’t come to battle
We will capture and murder his mates!

Wait! I know of a plan that’s fun
To catch this stupid chosen one!
Let’s all help the Dark Lord to rise
So Harry will meet his demise!

Kidnap the Potter boy!
Skin him like a fox!
Lock him up in Azkaban
Then see if he talks!

Then Mr. Voldy, our Dark Lord
Will take things in his hands of course!
He’ll be so pleased about Potter’s slain!
And all the power we will gain!

Weeeee!!!...

Credit: sparknotes.com. They have this thing every week called the "Think Tank", and this was the problem from a few weeks ago. Can you guys help our Lord solve the problem? Or will he crucio you into oblivion for not being able to? How word-savvy are you fellow Death Eaters??

Everybody's favorito Dark Lord is dressed in his finest white zoot suit (picture Joseph Gordon Levitt, but with vastly mais figurative blood on his hands, or Sue Sylvester, with vastly mais figurative blood on hers) and can't wait to meet up with—well, no one, because he has no friends. But nonetheless, he's breathless...

Credit: mugglenet.com

1. Make him take a shower.

2. Make him use shampoo in aforementioned shower.

3. Make him use clarifying shampoo.

4. Apparate seguinte to him, hand him a tube of super-strong facial cleanser, then quickly Disapparate before he realizes what happened.

5. Enchant this cleanser to follow him around until he uses it.

6. ...enchant the cleanser to follow him around anyway.

7. Tell him you roubou his teddy bear.

8. Tell him you won't give it back until he agrees to wash his hair.

9. When he washes his hair, tell him you were just kidding and said teddy urso has already been destroyed.

10. Sneak...

Voldemort didn't really have much experience with amor letters. Okay, he had no experience with them, having never really believed in amor until he'd laid eyes on Dolores Umbridge.

"Hmmm", he muttered to himself, "You make me feel like I'm being Crucio-ed", he scribbled the lines down on a piece of parchment then crossed the out. What if she didn't like violence or crucio?

"Maybe I should just ask her out", he thought.

After several hours of planning his seguinte move, he conjured up a bouquet of roses. He knew women liked roses. What he didn't know was that women usually preferred their rosas to...

Credit: mugglenet.com

Greetings, new follower:

If you are leitura this letter then you have doubtless been accepted into the select band of professional wizards known as the Death Eaters. If por some unprecedented chance you are leitura this and you have not been accepted into the Death Eaters then I suggest you put down this letter and leave now, or the consequences for you will be as terrible as my lifelong study into the Dark Arts can make them.

Please find enclosed a short introductory guide to Death Eating, which you must memorize and then eat, to prevent security leaks. (Due to an unfortunate...

Name: Katherina Nastacia Smirnov (Also sometimes spelled Smirnoff). Goes por "Kate". If you're mad at her, use her full name, :P

Kate joined the Death Eaters when Voldemort was first in power, and is one of the few female Death Eaters. She is an extremely skilled and accomplished witch, with excellent dueling skills.
Kate is Russian, and started out her schooling at Durmstrang, but transferred to Hogwarts during her third year. She told people it was because she wanted a better education, but it was really because she'd gotten kicked out of Durmstrang. On purpose. She hated it there, and she...

“What’s the matter Potter? Afraid to fight me? You shouldn’t be since you do every damn dia we see each other!” Snape yelled angrily at his enemy.
    “Oh that’s it Sev!” And with that, James lunged at Snape, tackling him to the floor. Hitting and punching went on for about seven minutos before a spell was shot at Jame’s back, disabling his mobility. Snape stared up at James in shock and finally pushed the Frozen - Uma Aventura Congelante teenager off of him. He looked to the direction in which the spell came, stunned to see Bellatrix Black’s wand smoking at it’s tip.
    “Why...

About a ano or two had passed and Lenzetta was moved from Arkim Orphanage to Greene’s Asylum for the criminally insane. The nurses and councilors at the orphanage just couldn’t handle Lenzetta anymore, plus she was never even looked at for adoption.     One harsh January night Lenzetta lye motionless in her bed. She never responded to nurses, she barely ate, and seldom slept. Two nurses came to take her jantar tray, which was still full, and frowned as they left her room.
    “Poor girl,” one nurse said sadly. “After all these years, I hope...

    Wormtail sighed as he sprayed detergent on the Dark Lords second-best black robe, (which, coincidentally, looked almost exactly like his best black robe. And his third, fourth, fifth, and sixth best black robes as well). He found it rather depressing that even after all he had done, handing over the Potters, and helping the Dark Lord regain his body, that the Dark Lord STILL made him do his laundry and fetch his lattes. At least it wasn’t as bad this time, since Bellatrix wasn’t-
“Hahahahaha!”, came a loud cackle behind him. He buried his face in his hands, which...

Credit: link. I didn't write it myself.

"I like taking pointless facebook surveys as much as the seguinte person. But, since they’re mostly about kissing, I started to wonder how someone completely incapable of feeling amor might handle such things. So I just had to tag my good pal Lord Voldemort in my most recent survey. Here's what he had to say:

Was your last kiss standing up, sitting down, or lying down?
The only kiss I believe in is the Dementor's kiss, and as I have very little soul remaining in my withered husk of a body, one would have little effect on me.

Whose cama were you on last?
Nagini's,...

Voldemort first laid eyes on Dolores Umbridge when he was at the ministry one day, impersonating the head of the Auror office. He figured it would be a great opportunity to not only stop them from their nation-wide manhunts for his Death Eaters, he could also Imperius them and hopefully kill a few. His stomach tingled with excitement.

As Cornelius lorota, fudge walked by, engrossed in conversation with some lady, Voldemort debated and decided against Imperiusing him to do something stupid in front of everybody. He would have plenty of time to embarrass that idiot Minister when he finally rose to full...

Full Name: Leah Winthrop Colchester. Just call her Leah or Col.

Leah joined the Death Eaters about two years after his first reign of power. Her parents were… "funders of his campaign", you might say, but not direct members. Having an impatient mind, she decided to cadastrar-se them directly, instead of following in her parents' footsteps. They were not happy with their only child's decision but agreed to send her to Hogwarts, where she was sorted into Slytherin with hopes of joining the Dark Lord.

Leah's biggest flaw is holding grudges. If someone did something to her, she'll never forget it. If they...