-Renesmee-
"Yes, Jacob, I'm fine," I say into the small black cellphone, putting extra stress on the word fine.
I've forced him out of the house for the day. It was almost as difficult as trying to pull my parents apart from one another. And that's saying something. Certainly mais difficult than trying to seperate Rosalie from her cosmetics box. Which she clearly doesn't need.
Anyway, I was trying to politely tell Jacob that if he didn't hang up already, I was coming over there and obliterating his phone.
Emmett had taken to calling MY baby "jelly bean", just because of what she'd looked like in the first sonogram. Which made me mad, which made Roalie mad, which made Emmett fear for his life.
I was hardly expecting it when I neared the topo, início of the staircase and was gripped with a constricting pain that made me gasp and sink to the softly carpeted floor, gripping the wooden banister tightly.
"Renesmee?" Jacob asaked me, sounding concerned.
"Ignore everything I've just told you," I ordered him.
"Yes, Jacob, I'm fine," I say into the small black cellphone, putting extra stress on the word fine.
I've forced him out of the house for the day. It was almost as difficult as trying to pull my parents apart from one another. And that's saying something. Certainly mais difficult than trying to seperate Rosalie from her cosmetics box. Which she clearly doesn't need.
Anyway, I was trying to politely tell Jacob that if he didn't hang up already, I was coming over there and obliterating his phone.
Emmett had taken to calling MY baby "jelly bean", just because of what she'd looked like in the first sonogram. Which made me mad, which made Roalie mad, which made Emmett fear for his life.
I was hardly expecting it when I neared the topo, início of the staircase and was gripped with a constricting pain that made me gasp and sink to the softly carpeted floor, gripping the wooden banister tightly.
"Renesmee?" Jacob asaked me, sounding concerned.
"Ignore everything I've just told you," I ordered him.
10. Beg him not to eat you.
9. Inform him that he seems to be the “depressed” Cullen.
8. Go up to him, look him in the eye and ask if he is hungry.
7. Spell his name with two “a”’s (Jaspar) and call him Jaspar Cullen. When he objects, saying his name is Jasper Hale, wave your hand at him and tell him all that blood must have gone to his brain.
6. Tell him only girls feel emotions. Then giggle and run away.
5. Dress up in a cape and fangs and leap out in front of him when he is least expecting it, proclaiming you have come to suck his blood.
4. Send out waves of lust and see how he reacts.
3. When he gets too close made your fingers into the sign of the cruz and cry, “The power of Christ compels you!”.
2. Splatter red paint all over his and Alice’s room and videotape his reaction.
And the Number One way to annoy Jasper Hale?
1. Whenever he says anything, snap to attention, shout “Sir, yes sir!” and salute, army style.
9. Inform him that he seems to be the “depressed” Cullen.
8. Go up to him, look him in the eye and ask if he is hungry.
7. Spell his name with two “a”’s (Jaspar) and call him Jaspar Cullen. When he objects, saying his name is Jasper Hale, wave your hand at him and tell him all that blood must have gone to his brain.
6. Tell him only girls feel emotions. Then giggle and run away.
5. Dress up in a cape and fangs and leap out in front of him when he is least expecting it, proclaiming you have come to suck his blood.
4. Send out waves of lust and see how he reacts.
3. When he gets too close made your fingers into the sign of the cruz and cry, “The power of Christ compels you!”.
2. Splatter red paint all over his and Alice’s room and videotape his reaction.
And the Number One way to annoy Jasper Hale?
1. Whenever he says anything, snap to attention, shout “Sir, yes sir!” and salute, army style.