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Riku114 said …
Bad Memory?

Cons: A lot of things mainly obvious

Pro: I can still be surprised at the end of an animê Ive already watched twice over Posted faz 18 horas
Riku114 said …
.... to be entirely honest I dunno how braced Ill be for Smokey's inevitable death in like.... 5-15 years from now :v

Like Im alright not taking her with me since shes considerably old and well integrated into the current flock cause the mover up north could be dangerous for her and cos my mom can take care of them well, but I dunno. She was a major part of the good things of my childhood that I dunno. Posted faz 1 dia
Riku114 said …
For all of you that dont really understand how old parrotss live, even cockatiels, one of the shortest living parrots, Smokey, potentially one of the oldest that I got in the summer of 3rd-4th grade ((was probably a little under a ano old))

I got her when I was about 8. Shes currently about 10 years old, maybe a bit older. She will live anywhere from until Im.... 23 up to 38.

Lucy, who hatched July 2017, is a little over one ano and will live until Im 42 if cared for right. Posted faz 1 dia
Riku114 commented…
Maybe even longer for both of them. faz 1 dia
Riku114 said …
Honestly, I am ever thankful for it, but the whole "wounded, cold person who can be helped and fixed to be soft" is a huge trap and like.... 90% of the time it doesnt really go out to the end. A small but notable amount of the population are like "Id amor a traumatized partner" or "Oh Id amor a yandere" or what not, but its honestly not a good idea

My boyfriend was honest to god crazy for taking the chance with me after half the things I did and staying after I did other things. Posted faz 1 dia
Riku114 commented…
Quite honestly if I wasnt stubborn on getting better, it could have easily turned into a long term abusive relationship faster than I could have held myself back. Yeah I have an amazing relationship with him now that we worked through all of that, but seriously... not something you should put your bets on. faz 1 dia
Riku114 commented…
Its honestly kinda gross how romanticized the "cold and cruel traumatized" character is. faz 1 dia
Rihanna312 commented…
This is so true! faz 1 dia
Riku114 said …
Okay so its likely that I actually do have genuine multiple personalities and in this session, for the first time in years and possibly to my memory, I actually roughly experienced a general vague memory that had almost all of the emotion behind it

And while that sounds horrible, its legit what Ive been kind of wanting because its the only thing I have been unable to work on in my mental health cause I resist so naturally against it myself that even in this session Posted faz 2 dias
Riku114 commented…
I had to very forcefully make sure I didnt dissociate or let myself escape it faz 2 dias
Riku114 commented…
It took him not letting me dodge it and escape it and a very forceful but balanced amount of me forcing myself without letting myself get distracted and escape por focusing too much on forcing myself faz 2 dias
TheLefteris24 commented…
Very interesting. I see now what you mean por him doing a good work !!!! faz 2 dias
Riku114 said …
Man its been so long since I so quickly and suddenly cut off emotion. Posted faz 3 dias
2ntyOnePilots commented…
Relatable. Good luck ‘big sis- Riku’. Hope that gets fixed up for you soon. faz 2 dias
Riku114 said …
Well Imma get fucked in the bunda por a 60% weighted final. Posted faz 3 dias
Riku114 commented…
Which wouldnt be a huge deal if either A) I didnt get a C+ on the last midterm because of one stupid calculation error (cause I would have otherwise gotten an A) and B ) If I wasnt learning from fucking textbook because my professor has an accent you cant fucking understand faz 3 dias
Riku114 commented…
What a fucking dia ruiner. faz 3 dias
Riku114 commented…
^ faz 3 dias
Riku114 said …
IM SAD

I CANT cadastrar-se THE "Mental HEalth in Award Winning Movies" FIRST ano SEMINAR BECAUSE IM TOO AHEAD IN UNITS AND CAUSE I HAVE TOO MANY CLASSES

I JUST WANT TO DISCUSS AND TALK TO PEOPLE ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH AND WATCH filmes REVOLVING IT :VVVV Posted faz 4 dias
Riku114 said …
NOTE TO SELF CALL COUNSELING AND FIGURE OUT HOW LATE I CAN cancelar IN CASE MY MIDTERM GETS PUSHED BACK AGAIN.

ALSO FIGURE OUT PASSING PERIOD.

Thank you, this as been a reminder from Riku who wants to go back to sleeping after her classes got canceled at 7 AM and couldnt go back to sleep out of both joy and her brain not letting her since there were things to do because of it. Posted faz 4 dias
Riku114 said …
Honestly Yandere Dev is miserable and I stopped being a supporter cause I kinda gave up on the fact his project would be completed but honestly I might go back to supporting him more. Or at least giving his thing a segundo chance. I kinda felt bad before but at least hes aware and working on things. Posted faz 4 dias
Riku114 said …
Ugh. When you are here trying to keep a decent sleep schedule and your roommate wont get off the phone on a school night at 1:30 AM after you asked nicely at 1:00 AM and just passive aggressively asked again. Posted faz 5 dias
JetBlack__ commented…
Why not use ear plugs? faz 5 dias
Riku114 commented…
Cos I couldnt sleep with earplugs faz 5 dias
Riku114 said …
I could honestly live with only birds and my boyfriend and I would be happpppy. Posted faz 5 dias
Riku114 commented…
I want my flock back ;-; faz 5 dias
Riku114 said …
ALSO THE LIKE BURNT / CHAFED / DAMAGED SKIN FROM USING CRUTCHES WITH A TANK topo, início BURNS SO BAD WHEN I PUT LOTION ON jesus CHRIST I FEEL LIKE ITS ON fogo Posted faz 5 dias
Riku114 said …
*heavy conversation and analysis about the cooperate religion of BTS*

*sends a aleatório bird video three segundos after* Posted faz 5 dias
Riku114 commented…
That actually happened and is the best summary of me faz 5 dias
Riku114 said …
I swear to god my mom gave me a coração attack XD

She abruptly started calling me which isnt TOO odd and I was like "Im busy, what is it?" and she just said "Lucy" XD

So I quickly dropped everythign and answered it and it was just Lucy hanging out with her and being a really good bird XD Posted faz 6 dias
Riku114 said …
I honestly dont understand how people can just sit and piss their life away online.

Id be mais producitve if my piss bunda brain would function and actually get motivated but the lack of physical movement is making me honest to god unmotivated mentally and thus cant focus or really enjoy anything >.> Posted faz 6 dias
Riku114 said …
Honestly kinda hate my leg right now. I have a three dia weekend Im spending being a hermit in my house cause I cant go out anywhere and socialize or so anything. Im literally just sitting on my bunda watching anime, watching youtube, and occasionally doing some homework or whatever. No real video games to play since Im still doing Hakuoki and not interested in any others. No real socialization cause Im a cripple. Posted faz 6 dias
Riku114 commented…
Without class or band or anything I just lowkey kinda realize how shit as boring life is. I need something to be passionate over or something to learn from or something / someone interesting but Im just fukcing sitting here doing the same thign over and over again. Like wtf faz 6 dias
Riku114 commented…
If Im just gonna sit and waste these seguinte few days can I at least not be involved in it and just fastfoward? I get a bit weird when I realize how monotonous life is and I dont particularly like it faz 6 dias
Riku114 said …
Krul might make my waifu list XD Posted faz 7 dias
Riku114 said …
IM SO SHOOK. WHY ARE MY FIRST BATCH OF ROOKIES DOING SENIOR SPEECHES?! ARENT THEY STILL LIKE FRESHMEN

WHY DID THEY GROW UP ALREADY?!?! Posted faz 7 dias
Riku114 said …
I request a bird vídeos in my club's video section if anyone has any. Posted faz 7 dias
Riku114 commented…
"a bird videos" faz 7 dias
JetBlack__ commented…
Sure faz 7 dias
Riku114 said …
So Im trying to analyze BPD, OSDD-1B, and DID to see if what I do and experience is mais fitting to one of the three or just seeing them in the context of eachother and its honestly really interesting. I dunno if Ill post it on "Just Shut Up" or as an artigo but wow.

I could honest to god write a thesis paper on this with how interestingly similar the three - especially BPD and OSDD - are on an outward level. Posted faz 8 dias
Riku114 said …
#TripleHealRainDishPelipper Posted faz 8 dias
TheLefteris24 commented…
#SpamProtectAndHealUntilThereIsn'tAnyMorePP !!!! faz 7 dias
Riku114 said …
>Sugar Daddy Riku Posted faz 8 dias
Riku114 said …
Lets play the game of "Is this the dissociated part of is that the dissociated part" Posted faz 9 dias
Riku114 commented…
I honestly need my flock back. faz 9 dias
Riku114 said …
Apologies about the Satou Matsuzaka gif spam XD The wiki feature wasnt working Posted faz 10 dias
TheLefteris24 commented…
No need to apologize over adorable Waifu Gif spams. You did well !!!! faz 9 dias
Riku114 said …
FUCK IM SO DISAPPOINTED. HAPPY SUGAR LIFE WAS SO CLOSE TO THE CLASSICAL SHAKESPEAREAN TRAGEDY ENDING WITH THE WHOLE CAST COMING TOGETHER AT THE END AND DYING ALL TOGETHER IN ONE PLACE BUT THEN THEY YEETED OUT OF THE PLAN AND IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BEAUTIFUL Posted faz 10 dias
Riku114 said …
EEEE. ITS ALMOST THURSDAY. Posted faz 11 dias
Riku114 commented…
I amor therapy so much when I have bad weeks on mental health XD faz 11 dias
Riku114 commented…
Ive kinda been pulling myself through the way I usually do and kind of using band and the trumpet as a crutch a bit. Cause honestly they give off such a nice healthy environment and air. Its soft and I feel so much mais relaxed around them. Like when the topic of mental health comes up its always sympathetic, empathetic, and just "Oh its good to care for yourself" and all and the world just needs so much mais of that. faz 11 dias
Riku114 commented…
Im very grateful. faz 11 dias
Riku114 said …
Im still honestly kinda amargo, amarga I was disarmed going to college. I like to have at least one faca on me at all times for just general use or for emergency use or just as a bit of a "dont fuck with me" if Im alone at night. Posted faz 11 dias
Riku114 said …
GOD. Happy Sugar Life thus far is GREAT. Like the stylistic choices to display emotion and mental snaps are really great and as someone who has had very... lets say vindictive / aggressive mental snaps, I feel it is really good representation XD

Also I really like Sato as a Yandere. Better than Yuno I believe. Posted faz 11 dias
Riku114 commented…
Holy shit is it amazing. All the characters are mentally fucked and the animê goes about its own ways of addesssing it faz 11 dias
Riku114 commented…
And displaying it and I fucking amor it but like faz 11 dias
Riku114 commented…
I need to go to sleep XD But Im fucking hooked god help me faz 11 dias
Riku114 said …
Debating between adding mais to characters or watching Happy Sugar Life. I decided that one since it interested me the most even though I am slightly concerned of certain things not workign well with me but... Ya know #Yolo Posted faz 11 dias
Riku114 said …
Pretty much had a one-on-one sectional practice with one of my section leaders cos no one else showed up and it was actually pretty awesome. Posted faz 11 dias
Riku114 said …
Also I realized one of the best types of people to have around you in the case you get into an accident or bad situation is someone with like.... anxiety or PTSD cos we are always either mentally braced or physically braced to deal with it.

Cos dude I have pretty much a first aid kit with me whenever I do anything remotely dangerous XD

Like I heard the bike breaks behind me screech like there was an accident turned around and was like "ARE YOU GUYS OKAY I GOT BANDAGES AND SUPPLIES" Posted faz 13 dias
JetBlack__ commented…
I am so doing a meme of this xD faz 12 dias
TheLefteris24 commented…
^ 👌 !!!! faz 12 dias
Riku114 commented…
XD faz 12 dias
Riku114 said …
I was most definately not almost late for class despite being there 20 minutos early because I got too into checking out the birds and psychology books in the bookstore across the rua from my class Posted faz 13 dias
Riku114 said …
Me @ My Brain: Make serotonin and dopamine you lazy fucker Posted faz 13 dias
Riku114 said …
Honestly it feels like I missed three consecutive days of anxiety medicine and while my ability to remember to take medicine the past week has been bad, I do not think I missed three days.

Cause apparently if I miss three days in a row it resets or something and thus I never missed three days in a row since I started taking it like... a ano and a half atrás Posted faz 13 dias
Riku114 commented…
Its honestly been a while since Ive been in a point of instability and my mind messing with itself that I have so strongly marked a dia to 'survive' with it to. faz 13 dias
Riku114 commented…
Like this is all minor compared to before and its pretty bad so like.... serious props to younger me faz 13 dias
Riku114 commented…
She was a beast to deal with all this faz 13 dias
JetBlack__ said …
When you own a Cockatoo someday name it Riku xD Posted faz 14 dias
Riku114 commented…
Why XD faz 13 dias
Riku114 said …
Im honestly not cut out for living with people other than like.... birds and maybe my boyfriend. I could probably also manage living with my PTSD best friend, but unless Im really bonded and/or really really trust them and are comfortable around them, it takes a huge toll on me in the long run

And things get really hard to manage when Im not fully stable because the small things trigger things to start again that I just have to keep to myself and it greatly slows down recovering. Posted faz 14 dias
Riku114 commented…
Cause unless its someone I trust and am comfortable with, I get easily set off when Im not fully stable and I know its usually ridiculous and overresponsive due to being unstable and just end up having to keep it to myself faz 14 dias
Riku114 commented…
But honestly I cant wait to get my own studio. I can handle things so much easier that way. faz 14 dias
Riku114 commented…
I amor my roommates and they are great people but I dont think its that good for me and all faz 14 dias
Riku114 said …
WHY THE FUCK ARE ALL THE UNREQUITED amor ROUTES WORSE THAN THE BAD ROUTES

UNREQUITED amor SOUNDS LIKE THE MEDIUM ONE BUT IN EDO BLOSSOMS ITS THE WORST Posted faz 14 dias
Riku114 commented…
Okay so Okita and Hijikata are pretty neck in neck relatable faz 14 dias
Riku114 said …
I decided that after I finish Okitas route Imma take a break and watch Happy Sugar Love. Ive been wanting to watch it for a while and just remembered it now that its finished XD Posted faz 15 dias
Riku114 commented…
Maybe not actualyl Ill see XD faz 15 dias
Riku114 said …
Id probably think Im some Tumblr self diagnoser with all the diagnoses I have but I really dont bring up most of them :v Im actually really shy about askign about them cause I dont wanna be a self diagnoser to the point my first therapist knew I had PTSD for a while but it technically wasnt official for over a ano XD Posted faz 15 dias
Riku114 commented…
And Im pretty casual with them cause its just a label, something to look into and understand and reflect on, and somethign to aid in planning further recovery progress faz 15 dias
Riku114 said …
Ooof. Apparently the new trumpet section leader this ano in my old highschool band is hospitalized with a collapsed lung and he has a solo for the fieldshow that no one can replace Posted faz 15 dias
Riku114 said …
.... tfw your favorito college professor has a lot of negative "Rate My Professor" ratings despite him being literally one of the best public speakers and most engaging teachers???

And its not only me. Like everyone who sits around me also agrees??? Posted faz 16 dias
Riku114 commented…
How the fuck XD faz 16 dias
Riku114 commented…
Imma give him five stars when I finish the class cos tbh sometimes I just go to his class for the energy and engagement in the class. Hes a wonderful lecturer and its a good escape from life for a bit XD faz 16 dias
Riku114 said …
Honestly glad I have chickens this morning for lab cause my brain is being fucking retarded cause yesterday was long and a bit problematic plus I got half the amount of sleep I usually do >.> Posted faz 16 dias
Riku114 commented…
Starting therapy again after 3 months off and shit is messing with my mind a bit :v faz 16 dias
Riku114 commented…
She was such a precious hen faz 16 dias
Riku114 said …
Also Okita is too relatable too XD Posted faz 16 dias
Riku114 said …
Me: I shoudl actually get a referral for psychiatry before I come close to running out of medication and risk having to go over three days without it. Imma go get that appointment

Me: *goes to the health website*

Website: We have these appointments tomorrow. If they dont work, contact this number for assistance

Me: O-O HOLY SHIT YOU DONT HAVE TO WAIT A WEEK PLUS FOR A DOCTOR APPOINTMENT? IS THIS WHAT NOT SUPER SHITTY MEDICAL SERVICE IS?! Posted faz 16 dias
Riku114 said …
#DowntownDavisDay Posted faz 17 dias
Riku114 said …
I miss my better half XD Posted faz 17 dias
Riku114 commented…
My mentally-healthy lifestyle is harder to manage without him XD faz 17 dias
Riku114 commented…
Cause honestly Im actually like.... 5x mais efficient with my time and mais productive and mais active. I actually study a bit, Im ahead on my homework, and I work well on my projects of interests because I dont spend time just laying down doing nothing or napping or taking pointless walks or other things that are otherwise considered inefficient usage of time faz 17 dias
Riku114 commented…
Personally I just dont have much of anything better to do XD faz 17 dias
Riku114 said …
Bro I need to chill XD

I mean I know I did most of my homework today that I had to do tomorrow so I can make Thursday an almost free day

But like... When I suggest we play something casual and shit like Sims again

Dont go off and be like "Nah we could work on developing characters more" and almost start doing it when you have a damn headache XD Posted faz 17 dias
Riku114 said …
Me: *explaining to my innocent roommate about THAT corner of tumblr*

Her: Doesnt it trigger you ever?

Me: It actually has in the past but yeah

Conversation: *turns to topic of she who should not be mention*

Me: ha..hahah....ha. No brain lets not get like this Posted faz 18 dias
Riku114 commented…
Cntrl Alt eliminar that. I do not need to think about it XD faz 18 dias
Riku114 said …
Roommate: Do you ever write down your feelings or anything?

Me: Do you want to see what it looked like when I did?

Roommate: .... with how you said that, Im honestly scared and will decide to pass on that. Posted faz 18 dias
Riku114 said …
Boi between TwinkleStar mentioning it and Okita's route, Im really remembering how bloodthirsty I used to get when I was really emotionally and mentally unstable. Posted faz 18 dias
Riku114 said …
Honestly as much of a shitty developer that YandereDev is, he hired a good person to create a good theme for the Delinquents and I really honestly amor the theme for its composition and shit Posted faz 19 dias
Riku114 said …
:vvv That feeling when you go to sleep and 20 minutos later your trumpet chat has one of those great night time aleatório bullshit discussions and now you wish you didnt sleep :v XD Posted faz 19 dias
Riku114 said …
Also my new therapist feels OCPD is a mais fitting diagnosis than OCD (excluding the fact Trichotillomania is a subtype of OCD) Posted faz 19 dias
Riku114 commented…
To be honest might look mais into it and discuss it mais with him at some point but I lowkey dont want to accept it XD faz 19 dias
Riku114 commented…
If I do have it (cause we barely talked about it in the run through of who I am on the first meeting) but I dont want to add one mais general branch of disorders to my list XD faz 19 dias
Riku114 commented…
Imma be sad is I become an even larger ball of mental health XD faz 19 dias
Riku114 said …
:3 I served as a pivot point for moving my roommate's dia from depressive as fuck to good again :3

It did cost my Hakuoki time I had scheduled but its nice to see I could help.

Shes now talking to her aunt about stuff and progressivo, para a frente planning and thats good :3 Posted faz 19 dias
Riku114 said …
Me: Well shit having trouble sleeping

Me: I guess Ill just do the entire week's worth of Econ homework ahead Posted faz 20 dias
Riku114 commented…
Homework shouldnt be as calming as it is XD faz 20 dias
Riku114 commented…
My brain was keeping awake festering on dumb anxieties so I just fed it something else to think about and be busy with XD faz 20 dias
Riku114 commented…
BTW GAD is short for Generalized Anxiety Disorder faz 20 dias
Riku114 said …
I relate to Okita's Tuberculosis rn with how bad my lungs got fucked up por my cold XD Posted faz 21 dias
Riku114 said …
Personally I feel that the older you get, the larger the responsibility it should be for you to provide for the younger generations. Not necessarily so strictly as said, but its part of what makes humans special. We are so capable at passing down information for years to come.

Its the responsibility of older members of society to provide as much learning experience to their youngers so progress can keep moving and everyone's life in net can be easier Posted faz 21 dias
Riku114 commented…
In that way, its an older person's responsibility to guide and help the younger people as much as they can because as someone who is older, you have a higher ability to be stable and have learned how to manage your own life. On the other hand, kids to young adults are shakey on it and just a little aid in that struggle can leave a large impact faz 21 dias
Riku114 commented…
Its a bit why Im always a mother that adopts younger people a lot to be honest. I may only be a ano or two older often, but everyone could use a "big sister" "big brother" or "parent" and such a relationship dynamic can help a lot. faz 21 dias
Riku114 commented…
And Im not saying responsibility like I usually do where its something I know is probably toxic and I feel I have to. I think its just a good rule of thumb. We ourselves might not have our lives together, but mais often than not, I feel they are mais lost in life. Some might not have faced the major things like money, work, and all, but if you think about it, a little kid loosing his favorito toy is super distressing and that in itself is something weve learned to handle and thus its our responsibility to help them and guide them in their way faz 21 dias
TheLefteris24 commented…
Amen to that !!!! faz 21 dias
Riku114 said …
I think I succeeded in taking a break today Posted faz 21 dias
Riku114 commented…
Mainly because my dormmates were out pretty much all dia and thus I was able to finally have a dia to just relax and all so its KINDA cheating, but fuck I did it XD faz 21 dias
Riku114 commented…
So I didnt really overcome my mental health obstacles and stuff like I wanted and what would normally be the situation, but I did at the very least complete the task of giving my brain a break and taking a dia to just relax XD faz 21 dias
TheLefteris24 commented…
A cookie has been earned !!!! faz 21 dias
Riku114 said …
YEp Souji shows potential for beign relatable too as I expected XD Im starting his route now Posted faz 21 dias
Riku114 said …
I honestly amor my boyfriend and how much he accepts my weirdness and bullshit XD He literally just openly accepted and went along with me calling him "my uke" XD Posted faz 21 dias
Riku114 commented…
He is quite honestly just everything I could ever want in a partner and stuff I didnt think were necessarily even possible to actually find XD faz 21 dias
Riku114 said …
BFRBs + Athletes foot REALLY isnt a good combo XD Posted faz 22 dias
Riku114 said …
Me: Okay its 11 AM what are we supposed to be going? *checks calendar*

Me: .... the calendar is blank until 6 PM

Me #2: Ya know we planned to like... ya know, have an easy dia on the weekend?

Me: .... OKAY THEN. LETS GET DOWN TO RELAXING AND HAVING FUN. WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO PLAY OR DO

Me #2: Can you like... not be so extreme and just relax when relaxing Posted faz 22 dias
Riku114 commented…
Deep breaths, relax muscles, lower shoulders, and just do whatever~ faz 22 dias
Riku114 said …
Also I officially #100%ed Hijikata and Saito and I totally have... 26.1 hours on the game XD Im officially 1/6th way done with the game Posted faz 22 dias
Riku114 said …
Im going back to get Hijikatas bad routes before starting another and I just remembered again how much he needs to stfu and stop being me Posted faz 22 dias
Riku114 said …
I really miss my flock tbh. Posted faz 22 dias
Riku114 commented…
Its been way too long since I got to hold a feathery friend. I hope we get to hold the chickens in the chicken lab for my animal science lab seguinte week faz 22 dias
Riku114 commented…
Cos Imma die if I cant hold a feathery friend for one mais week faz 22 dias
Riku114 said …
University: Here you have a $755 Refund Check to pick up

Me: .... i do? What for? I mean Il ltake it but idk why

Me: *going through financial papers and stuff* OH YOU GUYS DIDNT PAY ME MY WHOLE GRANT EARLIER SO THIS IS MONEY I HAD BUT DIDNT KNOW OHHH THATS NICE

Me: Well at least that makes sense. Alright time to account it into my budge-

University: *literally one hora after I picked up that one* You have a refund check to pick up

Me: ???? WHAT FOR??? Posted faz 22 dias
Riku114 commented…
Im getting so much money from the universidade I dont understand why Im getting it. faz 22 dias
Riku114 commented…
Maybe this one is the small student loan or something? Or maybe its the downpayment on dorm paid back or...??? faz 22 dias
Riku114 commented…
Tbh I was $400-500 above my budget I was given and thus adding an unexpected $755 made me around $1200 saved and who knows how much the seguinte one is .-. faz 22 dias
Riku114 said …
Also everyone says Hijikata is originally cold, mean, and an asshole of sorts but like... I never really saw that and I dont know if thats everyone having differnet opinions or a commentary on me since I relate to him XD Posted faz 23 dias
Riku114 said …
Too many good Hijikata Icons. I was gonna go for Dia das bruxas but got distracted. Maybe Ill give him a witch hat Posted faz 23 dias
Riku114 said …
Me: Imma google how to relax

Roommate: You go do that. *goes off to the bathroom*

*two minutos later*

Roommate: did you figure out how to relax?

Me: No

Roommate: .... get off the UC Davis hatchery page, yo uare supposed to be relaxin- no close the email too

Me: .... ..... *legit didnt realize she was not relaxing and now feels dumb* Posted faz 23 dias
Riku114 said …
I officially accepted that I have a genuine friend irl and thus also decided to give her the irl best friend at the same time and thats honestly kinda weird for me.

...

... i dont know if i like this XD Posted faz 23 dias
Riku114 commented…
I feel a lot of you underestimate how horrifically bad I am at actually establishing meaningful connections with people IRL and then actually recognizing and accepting it rather than denying it and negating the 'meaningful' part because I refuse to let it count cos of my discomfort into getting invested into friendships faz 23 dias
Riku114 commented…
But TBH shes one of the only two not-boyfriend, not-therapist, not-oldest-sister people I know IRL that I am even remotely comfortable being my purely natural self and we still are in contact even after having not seen each other in two months and tbh shes pretty cool faz 23 dias
Riku114 commented…
#GayPTSDBuddies faz 23 dias
Riku114 said …
Im annoyed por the amount of M&Ms in my trail mix Posted faz 23 dias
Riku114 commented…
I know Im weird faz 23 dias
Riku114 said …
WELP. I apparently also do dissociative fugue XD The one dissociation thing I claimed to NOT have I apparently have for ffs XD

My new therapist was like "You do A LOT for being dissociated so it sounds a lot like a fugue if you ask me". Apparently you dont have to have that whole complete memory wipe / shock when you come back from a fugue and apparently my selective amnesia and constant casual autopilot-dissociation is likely a mild but still active dissociative fugue ffs XD Posted faz 23 dias
Riku114 commented…
But fuck man I got therapy homework to "relax" rip me faz 23 dias
Rihanna312 said …
https://www.facebook.com/pubity/videos/767156683615418/ Posted faz 24 dias
Riku114 commented…
XD Thats hilarious faz 23 dias
JetBlack__ said …
Wait...who is Nomy? Posted faz 25 dias
JetBlack__ commented…
Guys, check out my new pergunta on the aleatório club xD faz 25 dias
Riku114 commented…
8theGreat XD faz 25 dias
JetBlack__ commented…
I see xD faz 24 dias
Riku114 said …
Nomy: "Doing my job stuff so I might be slow to respond so sorry XD"

Me: "Its cool XD I was just mostly rambling here. And looking at birds"

Nomy: "When are you not looking at birds"

Me: "good point" Posted faz 25 dias
TheLefteris24 commented…
^ A good point indeed lmao !!!! faz 25 dias
Riku114 said …
Lowkey having way too much fun with the thing me and Nomy are casually working on as a side thing together tbh. Posted faz 25 dias
Riku114 said …
YES MY 7-10 PM CHEM LAB GOT CANCELED COS THE UC SYSTEM IS EXPERIENCING A STRIKE. HALLELUJAH. Posted faz 25 dias
Riku114 said …
So I managed to match with a therapist that does have experience with trauma and dissociation so that should be interesting. Posted faz 25 dias
Riku114 said …
So anyways, we did the away game and what not well and stayed up from 10 PM until 3 AM until I had to let my boyfriend go which lowkey really made me kinda sad to see him go since it was honest to god the first time none of my mental health crap was constantly pressuring me (Constantly but not majorly; present but not crushing) and I didnt really wnat him to go.

Woke up the seguinte day, had the banquet and senior speeches and what not Posted faz 26 dias
Riku114 commented…
Then we got on the bus to head back to our universidade but only got like.... 20 miles out before one of the busses started majorly leaking oil and eventually catching on fogo in the form of an engine fire. That ended up making us stranded por a beach. faz 26 dias
Riku114 commented…
Then we all agreed (quite enthusiastically as if we hadn't just been told we were stranded for two hours) to "rally at the beach" which pretty much means to play música and have a band version of a party on the beach. Pretty much did that for three hours straight. Apparently a couple whose son killed himself a week atrás forced themselves out of the house to check out hte de praia, praia and smiled for the first time since because of us, our energy, and overwhelming positivity faz 26 dias
Riku114 commented…
I might upload some vídeos onto youtube XD faz 26 dias
Riku114 said …
IM BACK HOLY SHIT XD

Our bus broke down and we didnt get a bus until midnight and then had a 5 hora drive back XD Plus I had a cold but tbh it was a lot of fun and I needed it XD After I get comida and laundry done I might ramble mais on it if people are interested but it was quite a fun adventure with the band XD

Oh yeah I was at an away game that had us in a hotel over the weekend btw. Posted faz 27 dias
JetBlack__ commented…
that was unexpected news but oi glad you had fun xD yes mais please.. faz 27 dias
GDragon612 commented…
yyyyyyyyyyoooooo finally back!!!, but i am happy too you had alot of fun<3 faz 26 dias
JetBlack__ said …
Riku why u no have time xD Posted faz 28 dias
Riku114 commented…
Cuz Im a bando XD faz 27 dias
JetBlack__ commented…
:D faz 27 dias
GDragon612 commented…
hahahaha XD faz 26 dias
Riku114 said …
Fyi Goodbyes are still 200x harder than just cold turkey or any actual parting Posted faz 28 dias
Riku114 commented…
^This is in relation to the fact I got to see my boyfriend two nights atrás and had to part as well tho on the same dia XD It was harder than I thought it would be faz 27 dias
Riku114 said …
My relatable character list is really hard to rank at this point XD Also I moved a few to an "EX-Relatable" list since I was feeling some really didnt match up to the standard the list held Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
I also now added Tiers so I could place them mais generally into Three Ranked boxes rather than trying to compare two really close ones. faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
The Tiers arent really ranked inside the tier but First is higher than segundo which is higher than third faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
HIJIKATA GOTTA STOP DOING THINGS AND SAYING THINGS SIMILAR TO WHAT IVE DONE AND SAID FUCK OFF Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
ALSO CHIZURU STOP DESCRIBING HIM AS SOME PEOPLE WOULD DESCRIBE ME. YOU TOO CAN FUCK OFF XD faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
I might just go eat my massa, massas alimentícias bar and glare. XD faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
Hilariously hes also nicknamed "Demon Commander" por his friends and subordinates which is very well paralleled por the fact everyone in my old band called me "Satan" XD faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Honestly I'm not too good at showing affection out of the provider method. Providing gifts, money, aid, help, and all that stuff. It doesnt really work well for people that dont want it or people that dont understand that type of affection, but its just the most natural and comfortable one for me.

Im also pretty good at the method of spending quality time, but I also feel that flies over people's head a lot since I have limited time so my 'quality time' often isnt long Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
Im usually busy so cutting out like... half an hora or an hora to just you really says something faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Honest to god my boyfriend is the mais sweet thing ever. Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
*most sweet faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
Im the luckiest to have him in my life faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Ah yes. The 4 AM call time for a football game in Marching Band. Sounds about right. XD Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Lowkey feel a little bad cause people are comparing their schedules to mine and feeling lazy but that REALLY isnt fair. I keep myself busy sometimes as a bad coping mechanism XD Being busy is usually easier for me than being free Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Oh huh. Thats the first time I said that since I turned 18.

I guess Im finally / officially 'legal' now XD Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
FUCK IM NO LONGER #TEAMTEENAGER ON fanpop XD faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
Well.... "Teen"ager comes from the "teen" part so Im still a teen until Im like.... 20 XD So I still kinda am? faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
Its weird tho XD Being on here since I was like 11 almost 12 makes it odd being moved a biiiiit into the older group. TBH not THAT old since there are a lot of older people still on here but yikes XD faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Im 18 and take 6-7 pills every morning. What am I 60? Posted faz 1 mês
JetBlack__ commented…
You are 11 ano old cat xD faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Hijikata is too relatable tbh XD Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Welp that Chem midterm had to be on of the easiest tests Ive taken in a while Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Also I was debating between the conflict in my own values and ideals the fact that one of my closest college friends currently does drugs (which I am firm against myself; but I have had online friends that abused it so now that I think about it I should have no problem with it XD) but from what Ive heard and seen so far, shes rather responsible about it and doesnt push it so I suppose its fine. Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
My firmness on that value of mine hadnt had such a direct pergunta to my decision of people to be around and to choose to be friends with since those that did do it that I was friends with did it after I already took them as longer term friends so something like that was a matter of concern for them rather than decision making on my part faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
But personally, as much as I disagree with the usage of drugs and what not, as long as people arent in my face about it and trying to get me to take part and they themselves arent harming themselves with it or their behavior while on it isnt harming others, then its not really horrible. Everyone's life is their own faz 1 mês
TheLefteris24 commented…
Same as Zeppie and agree !!!! faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Honestly I really like my Microecon professor XD I mean Ive always loved Economy - both Macro and Micro - but he just makes the class great. Both a wonderful professor and just person in general XD Plus with my amor for participating, tendency to sit in the front, and the small conversation I have with him before and after class Im on pretty good terms with him too XD

But lowkey my favorito class to go to (until we get to Poultry in Animal Science prolly) Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Imma wanna die the seguinte two weeks XD

I have 9 hours of band practice this week, then an all weekend marching trip, two labs, and a midterm XD Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
omg

"arrrghh my head"

Youtuber: "Yeah you should just amputate it" Posted faz 1 mês
GDragon612 commented…
ouch XD , get well soon Riku~bun<3 faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
Nah XD That wasnt at me it was a thing in the game he was going through faz 1 mês
GDragon612 commented…
hehe thats good xD faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
extraverted Sensing (Se) (30.2)
good use

introverted Sensing (Si) (25)
average use

extraverted Intuiting (Ne) (29.3)
average use

introverted Intuiting (Ni)      (34.3)
good use

extraverted Thinking (Te) (43.6)
excellent use

introverted Thinking (Ti) (30.3)
good use

extraverted Feeling (Fe) (20.7)
limited use

introverted Feeling (Fi) (27.2)
average use

TEMPERAMENT: Theorist Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
Oh the Temperament was a different wording for the "Rationals" "Idealists" etc etc faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
But yeah that felt like probably the most legit of the tests out of the ones I took faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Fuck I was gonna record it but decided against it and now wanted to post it on my mural but now I cant find it :v

Anyways there was a Hijikata quote along the lines of "If I find myself in capable of doing a task, it is my responsibility to delegate it to someone who can." Posted faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
Personally thats the great thing about communications, having people around you with diverse skills, and - in the larger spectrum for like nations and what not - trade. Time is very limited and one cant spend their whole life learning literally everything (against as much as I talk about it and seem to try to XD) so some things have to be passed up. faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
AND THIS ALL STARTED FROM ME THINKING ABOUT A HIJIKATA QUOTE faz 1 mês
Riku114 commented…
I hate myself XD (not really) faz 1 mês
Riku114 said …
Hijikata is also pretty relatable. Saito is mais specifically relatable while Hijikata is mais generally relatable Posted faz 1 mês