aleatório Club
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My friends and I made this.. we found it funny. You might not get it though... But good for you if you do :D *No offence to any Bob's out there...

Sarah: Hello is anyone here called Bob?

Bob: Uh...I'm called Bob.

Sarah: Oh Bob I thought I'd never meet you!

Bob Uh, Uh, Uh okay okay that is fine.

Sarah: I am Sarah.

Bob Oh.. uh, uh, uh hi Sarah

Sarah: Oh Bob! I just realised the time. My mum can't pick me up from the dance!

Bob: Uh Uh um ok

Sarah: Could you take me home...with you?

Bob: Uh uh uh okay that is fine. Dad will pick us up.

Sarah: Oh... your dad... How about just you and me?

Bob: Uh uh ok that...
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#1: LILY'S OPPOSITE SIDE:
This was one of the most popular stories from Alpha and Omega from back in the dia I wrote for it.. 2011 & 2012.. So much incest, rape, swearing, and it has a long paragraph explaining Lily's tits.. That's just weird


#2: JASPER PARK/MATING SEASON:
Another Alpha and Omega.. All about incest, and nothing else


#3: FILLY FOOLING:
A MLP sex story.. Somehow I seem to keep finding nothing but a sex stories


#4: TWIST OF FATE:
Alpha and Omega.. Garth just kills everyone for no reason,and than Kate joins him because.. Just because.


#5: SWEET maçã, apple MASSACRE:
MLP.. Big Mac rapes the CMC's.. And than rapes AJ.. And... That's it.
OK here's part 3 - remember these aren't in any particular order

41.
Name: Tom Ward (Actor)
From: Silent Witness
Character: Dr Harry Cunningham
Attraction: He's just so gorgeous - very manly



42.
Name: Andrew Gower (Actor)
From: Being Human
Character: Nick Cutler
Attraction: His mouth and the way he talks (if you've not seen Being Human - you should watch it just for him lol) - and he looks a little like David Thewlis (although maybe not so much in this picture)



43.
Name: Alex Pettyfer (Actor)
From: Beastly
Character: Kyle
Attraction: Think it's actually the hair for me



44.
Name: James Buckley...
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You know what I hate? When you hold the door open for some aleatório fucker you've never even met in your life and they just walk on por without saying thank you or even acknowledging your god damn presence. Why this irks me so much I dunno. But it just does.

It's kinda like, well, this is what I always wanna say to them but don't:

Um, excuse me, who the hell do you think you are? Do you not see me opening this door for you, wasting segundos of my life for some aleatório dude I've never ever met? It's not gonna kill you to say thanks, it's not gonna shorten your life por even a jiffy and yes that's an...
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1.Turn on your favorito música or tv show,your favorito song makes you want to get done faster but don't get distracted. Also, try to stay away from cell phones or instant messaging you will get to carried away and before you know it you will be texting.



2.Pick up your clothes. Put them into two piles, the dirty and the clean pile. Put the dirty clothes in the hamper and hang or fold your clean clothes and place them in the closet.if you put your clothes in a dresser fold them neatly so there will be mais room in it.


3.Put all your shoes away. You could keep a pair out neatly but put the rest...
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posted by TDAPlayer158
"Alright son, I need your help to build this barn."
"But papa, it's about to rain!"
"Oh crap. Who can help us now?"
"Never fear Montage Man is here! I add 80s background música to make whatever you're doing faster!"
"Take on me! (Take on me!) Take me on! I'll be gone, in a dia or two!"
"That only took ten seconds!"
"Wow! Thanks Montage Man!"
"No problem, man"
"Ayuda! Un niño está robando mi televisor!"
"I don't speak Spanish."
"No problem, man. I can make learn Spanish in ten seconds."
"Give it all you got, don't stop now! You gotta give it all you got! Come on and take it to the top!"
"Ayuda! Un niño...
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posted by kellyclarkson12
My favourite celebrities

1.Michelle Trachtenberg-She is just very cool and acts perfectly in 17 Again and Gossip Girl as Georgina :)))

2.Leighton Meester-She is a wonderful singer,great actress and woman and acts perfectly in Gossip Girl as Blair :)

3.Dreama Walker-She is a wonderful actress in Gossip Girl as Hazel.

4.Kate French-Love her as Nikki Stevens in The l Word :)

5.Rachel Bilson-Can I add more?An amazing woman,perfect actress,wonderful style,amazing way of behaviour and way of life.She is my role model

6.Bethany Joy Galeotti-She is great,acts perfectly as Haley in One árvore Hill,has some great songs and has an amazing character.

7.Maite Perroni-A great woman and a singer!
Comment about wether its good or not !!!!! ~

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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme Song

Kevin: *Plays piano*
David: *Playing bass*
Liam: *Playing drums*
Liz: *Plays guitar*
Mr. Nut: *Sings* Welcome everybody to The Nut House. Thankfully this is not in Laos. Come on everybody into The Nut House. You can wear anything except for a blouse. Come on everybody, step into The Nut House.
Everyone: The Nut House!

Episode 19: Labor Day

Kevin and Liam were planning a special trip to celebrate Labor Day.

Liam: Where should we go?
Kevin: I'd like to try somewhere north for a change. A few friends at work recommended Boston.
Liam: That's a good idea. Ooh, how about Cape Cod? There's a nice...
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#1: KORN - HATER:
It's pretty much saying "haters" can only destroy your life if you allow them too. Something I myself already knew, and its why any time people flame me on Fanpop, I just tell them to continue till they bore themselves and stop on their own..

#2: eminem - BEATUITFUL:
Hard to explain..

#3: LIFE STARTS NOW - THREE DAYS GRACE:

#4:EVERYBODY HURTS: (forget the band):
Stopped sucides of the time.. That's saying something..

#5: PAIN - THREE DAYS GRACE:
Hard to explain..
posted by zanesaaomgfan
I have certain age ranges. I made it up based on the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade. [I was there!]

For kids under 4:

Balloons go up to the North Pole. There, Santa's elves will decide if the person who let go of it should be on the Nice or Naughty List. If Santa's elves thinks you've been nice, you will be on the Nice list forever. If Santa's elves been naughty, you will be on the naughty list until you send a good balloon up. Send a red balloon.

For Kids 5-8:

Balloons go up to God[Or whoever you believe in], the place where he decides if you should stay with him or go down below.

For kids over 9:

Up the sky, eventually, it'll explode.

:D
posted by karpach_13
Death Row in Women’s Prison
Three women are about to be executed. One’’s a brunette, one’’s a redhead, and one’’s a blonde. The guard brings the brunette progressivo, para a frente and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready! Aim…”
Suddenly the brunette yells, “EARTHQUAKE!!!”
Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while [...]

Jamaica
A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section of the plane. The stewardess rushes over to her and tells her she must mover to coach because she doesn’t have a...
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posted by MineTurtle
This ain't mine. I twas originally written por xSHOCKYx, who said 'Pass this on if you amor Jesus'. So here it is.


Science vs. God
"Let me explain the problem science has with jesus Christ." The atheist professor of philosophy pauses before his class and then asks one of his new students to stand.

"You're a Christian, aren't you, son?"

"Yes sir," the student says.

"So you believe in God?"

"Absolutely."

"Is God good?"

"Sure! God's good."

"Is God all-powerful? Can God do anything?"

"Yes."

"Are you good or evil?"

"The Bible says I'm evil."

The professor grins knowingly. "Aha! The Bible!" He considers for a...
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posted by eslisle4254
I found this poem and i felt i needed to post it


Month One

Mommy, I am only 8 inches long, but I have all my organs. I amor the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it, I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your coração beat is my favorito lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy, today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me, you could definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my início though. It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy, I'm a girl !! I hope that makes you happy. I always want you to be happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound...
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1. Turn to a stranger and sing a aleatório song
2. When your on a floor someone wants to get off on make sure they don't get off
3. Say in a new jersey accent "I told my daughter not to give the dog coffee. What does she do? She gives the dog coffee! Now i've got a dead dog! A dumb daughter! And no coffee!"
4. If your with a friend, and there are mais people start a annoying conversation. (I did this one time and all the people in the elevator turned to me, someone even said shut up XD)
5. Pretend your driving in a car, and make motor sounds
6. Whisper into a strangers ear "I am a parol officer! Respect...
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1.When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.

2.Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

3.Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.

4.Call a Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor you're on.

5.Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for a friend. After a while say, "Hi Greg. How's your dia been?", and let the doors close.

6.Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"

7.Bring a camera and take pictures...
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posted by cloudstrifefan
The Nerd Language is a complicated series of numbers and symbols used to show expression,in the Nerdenton.By using The Nerd Language you therefore commit yourself to the intensity of The Nerd Language.It is not to be taken lightly.To make oneself a "nerd",one must stand,put there right hand on their chest,and scream the words:OOGLEY BOOGLEY BOOG.KUMAHWAKI CHOOLAH.Then,they will become a nerd.

The Nerd Language of Nerdenton
A=1
B=#
C=-
D=(
E=@
F=4
G=9
H=_
I=10
J=8
K=+
L=5
M=00
N=%
O=3
P=)
Q=:
R=7
S=^
T=2
U=;
V=!
W="
X=6
Y='
Z=*
posted by beeibe
I found this beautiful artigo and I had to share :)


One dia a father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the firm purpose of showing his son how poor people live.
They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.
On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"
"It was great, Dad."
"Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.
"Oh yeah," said the son.
"So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father.!
The son answered: "I saw that we have one dog and they had...
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posted by Whirlwind586
I know that this sounds really frickin' ridiculous, but I saw an advertisement on this website about their new show on Comedy Central with some dude that said where I lived and what I liked. Normally I wouldn't care if they knew what my favorito things are, but when they say they know what my location is then that is way too far.

I'm not a Facebook/Twitter person that lives an open book. I'm pretty paranoid about security, yet a comedy channel can still hack into my computer and look at my history. I'm afraid now that if I don't watch the latest episode of Tosh .0, they're gonna send people...
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posted by AlOoOosh
Born in Calgary, Canada on March 14, 1991, Rhiannon moved to Melbourne at age four when her engineer father got a job transfer. Originally planning on staying for 18 months, the family extended their visa and embraced Melbourne as their new home.

Outside of school, Rhiannon studied musical theatre, drama and dance, but at age 11 knew that atuação above all else was her ultimate passion.

Rhiannon graduated last ano from The Children’s Performing Company of Australia (after joining at age nine) and performed in musicais such as The Lion King.

Rhiannon was first seen on screens in Neighbors at...
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