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Is anyone here who have interest in "Haiku"....

Because, i wanna write Haiku.. .
.
and i wrote it,
Need your conselhos ..
About haiku i wrote!
Here:
A lady
And love
Rainy
.
Dusk a
lady lad
man in
.
I want your advice.. .

 K_lleH-Hell_k posted over a year ago
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poesia Respostas

SRitchieable said:
The trick to haiku is: The haiku has to make sense as a 'sentence' as well as meeting the vowel-count requirement.

A traditional Japanese haiku goes:
Girls planting paddy [ie arroz fields]
Only their song
Free of mud.

As a sentence this reads "Girls planting paddy [have] only their song free of [the] mud [ie the mud of the arroz paddy]." Which makes sense in its own right - if you think it through.

I think the art form has to be considered as one would consider (say) a Japanese paper lantern or paper screen. One can see what a hakiu is talking about - ie arroz paddy planting, amor etc - but one sees it as though one were looking at the subject through a fine (rice) paper screen. It 'simplifies' the scene (how much can one see through rice/tissue paper?) but at the same time this 'simplification' gives one a new way of perceiving the subject.

So - "A lady/ And love/ Rainy" could be tinkered somewhat. It depends what you want to say. Is a lady in amor like the rain or a rainy day? Is amor like rain? If so, how? That's what a haiku tries to capture/communicate. Perhaps:
Rain falls on
A lady; it
Is like love.

Or whatever it is you TRULY want to say.


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 The trick to haiku is: The haiku has to make sense as a 'sentence' as well as meeting the vowel-count requirement. A traditional Japanese haiku goes: Girls planting paddy [ie arroz fields] Only their song Free of mud. As a sentence this reads "Girls planting paddy [have] only their song free of [the] mud [ie the mud of the arroz paddy]." Which makes sense in its own right - if you think it through. I think the art form has to be considered as one would consider (say) a Japanese paper lantern or paper screen. One can see what a hakiu is talking about - ie arroz paddy planting, amor etc - but one sees it as though one were looking at the subject through a fine (rice) paper screen. It 'simplifies' the scene (how much can one see through rice/tissue paper?) but at the same time this 'simplification' gives one a new way of perceiving the subject. So - "A lady/ And love/ Rainy" could be tinkered somewhat. It depends what you want to say. Is a lady in amor like the rain or a rainy day? Is amor like rain? If so, how? That's what a haiku tries to capture/communicate. Perhaps: Rain falls on A lady; it Is like love. Or whatever it is you TRULY want to say.
posted over a year ago 
*
Thank You!!
K_lleH-Hell_k posted over a year ago
RiderOfTempest said:
i always thought that haiku had to have 5 letters in the 1st line, seven in the 2nd, and 5 again in the 3rd.....
then again, i've never studied it properly....

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posted over a year ago 
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Lol, :D
K_lleH-Hell_k posted over a year ago
*
actually its five syllables not letters
RiverIce posted over a year ago
Jace123 said:
I like Haiku its preety nice!
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posted over a year ago 
RiverIce said:
I always thought that Haiku was like
1st line: 5 syllables
2nd line: 7
1st line: 5
like:

The flores I pick
They dance with colors, like me
The as cores never fade

or

amor is a Boulder
You can study it nicely
Or let the rock fall

i like the 2nd one
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 I always thought that Haiku was like 1st line: 5 syllables 2nd line: 7 1st line: 5 like: The flores I pick They dance with colors, like me The as cores never fade or amor is a Boulder You can study it nicely Or let the rock fall i like the 2nd one
posted over a year ago 
audrey34-z said:
A haiku is a short,timed poesia that expression throught a 5-7-5 syllabes.
You have to expell your image that is ephemer.Meaning it doesn't stay too long.

Japão origin, they have to compress their sensation,season into small line. The best option is figure of style,compar it to another object,material or double sense.

Your's is dry,only 4 syllabes to each vers (Tetrasyllabe) and not so expressif.The text give you an illusion of being an haiku since the 2nd one is long to others snce you can do a 7 syllabes one.
But it doesn't mean that you have to stop, the road to a better haiku is long and expression and idea clasing will make you a better writter.
The road may be long but you can do it.
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posted over a year ago 
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