my little pónei, pônei - a amizade é mágica Club
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posted by windwakerguy430
 Road Rage
Road Rage
(Plum Jerkum and Shot Glass stop car in front of car shop)
ameixa Jerkum: Huh, Scrap Metal. What a name
Shot Glass: Lets just find this Road Rage pónei, pônei so he can help us (Shot Glass and ameixa Jerkum walk into shop) (Plum and Shot see pónei, pônei working under car)
ameixa Jerkum: Um... Sir......... Sir........
Shot Glass: Hey, we want some service (Kicks pónei, pônei in leg)
Pony: AHH!!! (Gets out from under car) Oh, you ponies must be the one that cop wanted me to meet
ameixa Jerkum: Yes. I'm ameixa Jerkum and this is my brother, Shot Glass
Pony: Thats fucking awesome, man. I'm Road Rage. What can I help you with
ameixa Jerkum: Well, we heard your good with stealing vehicles and that kind off stuff. Do you think you can use that to help us
Road Rage: Well, I could help you modify a truck and turn it into a killing machine. I just need you guys to snatch it for me
ameixa Jerkum: Aren't you going to do it
Road Rage: Wish I could, bro, but I got to get this car fixed. I'm doing it for a loan shark. You know what those guys do, right
Shot Glass: Yeah, I do. Didn't end so good. Well, for them, it didn't
ameixa Jerkum: So, how are we going to get this truck
Well, you'll be able to find it coming down the rua any moment now. Just cause a road block with the de mesa, flatbed, mesa truck I got stored behind the shop. You guys better get to work. Oh, and one of you will need this (Throws trucker uniform at Shot Glass) Good luck you guys
Shot Glass: Well, I've always wanted to drive a truck. I guess you just need to steal the truck (Goes to back)
ameixa Jerkum: (Gets in car and drives down the street)
Shot Glass: (Gets in truck and drives down street) (Blocks traffic with truck) (Dials number) hey, Plum. Do you see a delivery truck anywhere
ameixa Jerkum: Yeah, I see one. Just distract them long enough while I get the truck
Shot Glass: Got it
Delivery pónei, pônei 1: Oh, now what thew fuck is this shit (Honks horn) Hey, mover the truck, asshole
Shot Glass: (In Southern Accent) Oh, sorry, partner
Delivery pónei, pônei 2: We ain't your partner, bitch
Shot Glass: Got it. We just have some minor troubles with the truck
Delivery pónei, pônei 1: Well, now you got another problem (Gets out of truck)
Shot Glass: Now, lets not do anything either of us will regret okay.
Delivery pónei, pônei 2: Then mover your piece of shit truck out of the way
(Plum gets into truck) (Plum backs truck up)
Delivery pónei, pônei 2: Hey, this is a set up. There stealing the truck
Shot Glass: Well, glad to know one of us is thinking well (Shots one of the ponies) (Pulls trigger) (No fire) oh shit (Reloads)
Delivery pónei, pônei 1: Oh, fuck this (Runs after truck)
ameixa Jerkum: (Still backing up) Oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit (Delivery pónei, pônei pulls open car door) (Delivery pónei, pônei pulls out gun) (Grabs ameixa Jerkum)
Shot Glass: Hey, get off my brother, mother fucker (Fire gun) (Hits and kills pony)
ameixa Jerkum: Thanks, Shot. I owe you
Shot Glass: It was nothing, really. I just really like shooting pieces of shit like these ponies in the head (Plum drives truck back to shop) (Parks car in front of shop)
Road Rage: Oh, fuck yeah. Good work you guys (Opens back of truck) (Pulls out large bag of cocaine and rips it open) (Snorts cocaine) Oh, Fuck yes. Thats good stuff right there
ameixa Jerkum: Are you saying we robbed this truck just to get you fucking drugs
Road Rage: No... Well, not completely. I will modify the truck to be better... right after I hide this stuff. Can't have the cops poking around. But, I'll help you guys out in anyway I can. Especially if there's mais of this to go around. por the way, where are the delivery ponies
Shot Glass: Oh, well they kinda... you know... died
Road Rage: You killed them (snickers) You two are fucking nuts
ameixa Jerkum: No offense, but I think the best way for you to see nuts is looking i a mirror
Road Rage: (Laughing loudly) Its so true
posted by Seanthehedgehog
When Dia das bruxas rolled around, it seemed like the perfect time in the game to take on the dress code. This usually would've gone easy, but Leo got this crazy idea to put in a lot of challenges, and chances for me to earn extra big points.

At my house

Mom: No costume Rafe?
Rafe: It's middle school. Nopony is going to wear a costume.
Georgia: I'm dressed as a fairy!
Rafe: Great, nopony cares. *leaves*

Even though it seemed like I had no costume, everything I needed was in my backpack.

I went to the bathroom, and changed as soon as I got the chance. I had black shoes, black pants, a black turtleneck,...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Guess what I'm starting this part with? A song!!

link

Nearly everypony in Dia das bruxas Town saw the light in Jack's house, but they couldn't find Jack, and started singing

Something's up with Jack
Something's up with Jack
Don't know if we're ever going to get him back
He's all alone in there locked away inside

Never said a word
Hope he hasn't died
Something's up with Jack
Something's up with Jack

Inside Jack's house, he was also singing

Christmas time is buzzing in my skull
Will it let me be, I cannot tell
There are so many things I cannot grasp
When I think I got it, and then at last through my bony hooves...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Shortly after arco iris, arco-íris Dash's arrival, we turned back to normal.

Sean: Our disguises are gone. Cadence, do you know any spells to make us look like one of them?
Cadence: No I don't.
Sean: Alright. *gets map of castle* We've got a lot of ammo, explosives, and we need to create a lot of confusion if we're getting out of here alive.
Rainbow Dash: What should we do?
Sean: Dash, I want you to place some explosives in this room, most of them should go por the door, for when the enemy tries to open them, they'll die.
Shredder: There's also an armory room, we oughta put one in there.
Rainbow Dash: And one...
continue reading...
Twilight: Not only did I lose my wings, but Celestia put a spell on me to make me sound like a black man!
Rainbow Dash: Wow. You can stay with us until Celestia makes you a princess again.
Twilight: thanks gurl.
Sean: *walks in house* Twilight? What happened to your wings?
Twilight: Man, I done too much stupid shit, and they got taken away.
Sean: Why do you sound black?
Twilight: That's another thing ah got for being idiotic.
Rainbow Dash: Who said you're idiotic? Sure you made a few wrong choices, but that doesn't make you retarted.
Sean: Yeah, I'm pretty sure Albert Einstein made some dumb choices....
continue reading...
Mike: Who do we have to deal with?
Rainbow Dash: I found out another pónei, pônei has been feeding info about our work to other mafias.
Dan: Who is it?
Rainbow Dash: Diamond Tiara.
Dan: I should have known.
Applejack: Let's kill her.
Rainbow Dash: Alright, but we have to do it before she leaves for Ponyville.
Applejack: Then lets kill her now, the sooner the better.

Applejack pulled up to Diamond Tiara's house with Pinkie Pie sitting in the back.

Silverspoon: We're moving back the same time that the CMC is.
Diamond Tiara: I cannot wait to make fun of them again.
Applejack: Howdy you two.
Diamond Tiara:...
continue reading...
That night, I put my plan into action. I went to the blindspot, and went through the fence. No one noticed that I left until tomorrow morning.

Meanwhile, in the tunnels.

Pablo: *digging, but feels dirt falling on him, then looks up* Oh thank god. The roof isn't going to collapse. *Continues digging*
Volk: *Gets bag of dirt full, and gives it to Sigmund*
Sigmund: *Passes bag to Airborne*
Airborne: *Passes bag to arco iris, arco-íris Dash*
Rainbow Dash: *passes bag to Sacred Symphony*
Sacred Symphony: *Passes bag to Shredder*
Shredder: *Passes bag to Jade*
Jade: *Passes bag to Bartholomew*
Bartholomew: *Passes bag...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Con found Lola tied to her bed, and there was tape on her mouth.

Con: *Frees Lola* What happened?
Lola: One of Frank's men came here, and tied me to this chair. He kept asking me where you were, but I didn't say anything.
Con: And that's why he tied you to the bed?
Lola: Yes.
Con: Well it's over. I killed him, and now we got to dump his body somewhere.
Lola: Where are we going to do that?
Con: Tonight. Oh, and I got the groceries. This should be enough for our flight into Equestria.
Lola:Con! *hugs Con* We can't go back to Equestria. Your boss will be looking for you.
Con: He won't know where...
continue reading...
added by NocturnalMirage
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: joyreactor